frus69 Posted June 20, 2019 Share Posted June 20, 2019 Yeah - but hear me out though, its more that I didn't leave any mystery and the other part is that I had no game... When I think back - like I put in the call instead of texting her - which was the right thing, but I for example didn't have anything to say about my day etc. I don't know if I can say it here - but I revealed too much. Like how long I haven't had a girlfriend. And how empty my life is. If you aint got much of a life - which girl would want you right? I got to obviously pull my sock up in that department. I feel like doing a full run down on what happened... Cause when I think about it - I probably did succeed at some things with my date, but fell short in other parts that could have pushed it over the fence. Again, it's not something you did. She just wasnt too interested to begin with. If she was interested, your nervousness would be "cute" and you revealing yourself would be "open and honest". But she wasnt that keen so even if you appeared calm and mysterious, she still wouldnt give a damn. If I wasnt interested in a guy, him being mysterious isnt going to make me want to know anything more about him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author shizzle_84 Posted June 20, 2019 Author Share Posted June 20, 2019 You sound really nervous ... so of course, you were out of sorts during the date ... and when the real date unfolded (not the fantasy one you had hoped for) you lost your balance, spoke too much, revealed too much. That happens when you're young and nervous. Now get back out there and ask out a new person ... this time when you go out ... you want to think more ... like ping-pong ... You share a joke. She shares a joke. You share a bit about your story (if you want!). She expresses interest in hearing more. You continue. She seems uninterested, you stop . Keep asking people out until you're with a woman who makes you quite comfortable at the date. That is a successful date! You won't have to work so hard ... you won't be awkward because the person will calm your nerves. And you do know Tinder has shifted ... it's not simply a hookup site (if it ever was) ... Lots of people come there to find people to meet and date. So no asking someone so soon to your house. Thanks man... that’s very kind of you... Link to post Share on other sites
Author shizzle_84 Posted June 20, 2019 Author Share Posted June 20, 2019 Again, it's not something you did. She just wasnt too interested to begin with. If she was interested, your nervousness would be "cute" and you revealing yourself would be "open and honest". But she wasnt that keen so even if you appeared calm and mysterious, she still wouldnt give a damn. If I wasnt interested in a guy, him being mysterious isnt going to make me want to know anything more about him. Hit the nail on the head - I have to say Link to post Share on other sites
Author shizzle_84 Posted June 29, 2019 Author Share Posted June 29, 2019 I don't know what's up with me but I tried calling and messaging her to no effect... She didn't;t pick up - didn't reply... Then today I sent her another message after about 5 days of silence telling her I really enjoy her company and that if she finds any of her days empty - to feel free to message me. I like this girl... Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted June 29, 2019 Share Posted June 29, 2019 I don't know what's up with me but I tried calling and messaging her to no effect... She didn't;t pick up - didn't reply... Then today I sent her another message after about 5 days of silence telling her I really enjoy her company and that if she finds any of her days empty - to feel free to message me. I like this girl... ***CRINGE*** She is not into you, and you know it. Focus on women who are. Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted June 29, 2019 Share Posted June 29, 2019 It sounds like it was all a bit uncertain from the start. She could have been put off by you inviting her back to your place on the first date - may have assumed that all you were interested in was sex - but that invite does not necessarily mean anything. Second date, you were nervous. If you revealed a lot about yourself, then that's one thing, but it means she wasn't doing the talking. Did she get chance to say anything? If a guy talks non-stop on a date, telling me all about himself, in the end I start to feel it's all about him. She probably didn't know how to respond to it all but by the end of the date had had enough of listening and not being taken into consideration herself. She has a child (children demand a lot from you, so you are 'giving' all day and night) and she has a sick mother (if she is telling the truth). She has a lot on her plate and probably needs to be with a fun guy who takes care of her and listens as much as he talks. Dating is a learning experience. When things go wrong on a date, learn from it, change things next time. No point berating yourself for anything. Link to post Share on other sites
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