Mac0908 Posted March 13, 2019 Posted March 13, 2019 This isn't the first time either. Late last year in December I went out with a girl a couple of times. The thread can be found in my history. Long story short she ended up completely ghosting me. It was one of the most shocking blowoffs I had ever experienced seeing as how even though I barely knew her, she came off as extremely genuine, honest, and polite. In any event, I was ghosted. She even ignored one last ditch effort text from me trying to find out what had happened. Then just last night, I'm on Match.com (where we met) and I notice that she views my profile. I know this will be viewed by many as a stupid thread, but it really is a bit fascinating to me. These women, this one in particular 32 years old, just so immature, weird, whatever you want to call it, to BLOW someone off, give absolutely zero explanation whatsoever, then have the gall to creep on your profile again down the road. Call it simple curiosity call it her looking to get some validation that she wasn't really attracted to me after all, whatever. I just call it dealing with a flat out piece of work
preraph Posted March 13, 2019 Posted March 13, 2019 It's idle curiosity. Plus she may not even remember you from before. 4
Normm Posted March 13, 2019 Posted March 13, 2019 Morbid curiousity brought about by boredom cause she is only meeting losers. Maybe she's thinking "I wonder if I screwed up ignoring this guy he might not be a 10 but maybe he doesn't have to be, all these great looking guys turn out to be losers and most don't even look like their pictures". I recall about 10 years ago I went to a New Years Eve party at a local hall with a girl I was seeing for a few weeks. We were at a long table filled with strangers, this one girl diagonally across from me kept staring at me. She looked familiar but I couldn't place it. Finally I got it. I caught her eye and said "I think I messaged you on Match but never heard back". She smiled and said "Yeah, I really wanted to blow you but couldn't get up the nerve". Ok maybe she just smiled and said "Yeah" and I just embellished there but anyway point being she kept staring at me probably more than the not so good looking bald guy sitting next to her. My only take away was that she probably realized she turned me down a bit too hastily. I've been told I look a lot better than my pictures.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted March 13, 2019 Posted March 13, 2019 By accident? It's been years since I did online dating, but don't they give you random matches? Maybe she was just absent-mindedly clicking through.
Normm Posted March 13, 2019 Posted March 13, 2019 Maybe that's why people get blocked on dating sites even if they did nothing wrong. Happened to me once. Messaged a woman, got a very nice reply back to the effect of "you sound like a great guy but not my type, good luck". I worked up a nice response to that, and when I went to send it I discovered I was blocked! I was like "WTF" and chalked it up to her probably being abused after telling other guys "no thanks", I hear it happens all the time. But maybe it's just an efficient way of keeping the volume low. Not interested in a guy? Block him so you don't have to keep seeing the same profiles over and over again. Makes sense. 2
I'veseenbetterlol Posted March 13, 2019 Posted March 13, 2019 It's idle curiosity. Plus she may not even remember you from before. This is prob true. More then likely before looking at your profile, she didn't remember you. Then she prob recognized that she went on a date w/you.
Gretchen12 Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 Anyone can view your profile, even other men. So don't let it bother you.
Author Mac0908 Posted March 14, 2019 Author Posted March 14, 2019 Anyone can view your profile, even other men. So don't let it bother you. Besides the point. Responses on here still crack me up sometimes. "She didn't remember you" lol Several dates just a couple of months ago. Pretty sure she remembers who I am. In any event, I agree on the curiosity factor. That's all this was. 1
mortensorchid Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 You might as well ask what the meaning of life is, because I don't know the answer to that either. I've had guys contact me through Facebook or dating websites who I'd already met before or at least were in contact with through chat months, even years before. They do it because they can. Even when I remind them that we had already met, they either stop communicating then or one will said to me "First dates are so hard, can't we try again?" I'm like "what's the point? you'll blow me off again". So the answer is because they can.
Fair Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 Honestly, what's the big deal? She ghosted you awhile ago and noticed you again and took a peek out of curiosity. If it's just once and not multiple times I doubt if it means anything. Maybe you're just angry at this girl for blowing you off and so you're making a mountain out of a molehill or hoping she'll reach out again, to you. I haven't read all the replies on this thread so I might be missing something here...
TheFinalWord Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 (edited) This isn't the first time either. Late last year in December I went out with a girl a couple of times. The thread can be found in my history. Long story short she ended up completely ghosting me. It was one of the most shocking blowoffs I had ever experienced seeing as how even though I barely knew her, she came off as extremely genuine, honest, and polite. In any event, I was ghosted. She even ignored one last ditch effort text from me trying to find out what had happened. Then just last night, I'm on Match.com (where we met) and I notice that she views my profile. I know this will be viewed by many as a stupid thread, but it really is a bit fascinating to me. These women, this one in particular 32 years old, just so immature, weird, whatever you want to call it, to BLOW someone off, give absolutely zero explanation whatsoever, then have the gall to creep on your profile again down the road. Call it simple curiosity call it her looking to get some validation that she wasn't really attracted to me after all, whatever. I just call it dealing with a flat out piece of work Very similar thing happened to me. Ghosted after several delightful conversations. No explanation, but no pleading on my end. Just dead air. I now thank these people. I haven't had to invest any money time or emotional energy to find out what kind of person this is. This was about 4 weeks ago. Last week, she added me on Snap. I waited a week, accepted, but I never wrote. I thought, okay, maybe she's had a change of heart and she'll write me and apologize and ask for another chance. If it's sincere, I would at least have respect for her. Yesterday, she wrote me again on a dating site, asking me how I'm doing. No explanation of the ghosting. I did not respond. If she can't apologize for ghosting, then I am seeing all I need to know about the type of individual I'm dealing with; ghosters are doing you a favor. When a tough decision needs to be made, instead of facing it, they run. It's not a random accident. I don't buy that for a second. I get online and I don't randomly look at girls profiles that I don't like. Just look at it as being hilarious that she's viewing your profile. The best revenge is to live well. She knows she made a mistake. If she can't own it, humble herself and write you, then that probably explains why she's online. Edited March 14, 2019 by TheFinalWord 2
basil67 Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 I'd say it's likely she doesn't remember speaking with you. When I browse my favourite authors, I sometimes need to read the blurb to remember whether I actually read that book before. The name and cover alone isn't enough. I reckon that if I was on OLD, it would be much the same for me.
Highndry Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 She's realizing how stupid she is because the grass wasn't greener, it was brown and dried up. 1
toomanyquestions123 Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 Because we are curious human beings, doesn't mean we are interested though.
Author Mac0908 Posted March 14, 2019 Author Posted March 14, 2019 She's realizing how stupid she is because the grass wasn't greener, it was brown and dried up. Basically. Good luck to her and all the other joe schmo’s on there
Mrs._December Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 Meh...I've done what she did 1000 times when I was online dating. A picture would go by and I'd click on it, thinking he looked decent and then when I'd get to the profile, I'd discover it was a profile I'd seen before and the guy looks like Lurch from the Adams Family - his thumbnail picture was deceiving. Or, I'd see a picture of a guy I hadn't seen before and click on it, only to discover it was a profile I'd seen several times, but he'd updated or changed his main profile pic again making me think it was someone new. So I'd clicked on it, thus viewing his profile again. It happens all the time, but it doesn't indicate a definite interest. It sure didn't on my part most of the time when I was doing OLD. 4
BluEyeL Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 One possible scenario. One thing I was doing on match back when I was dating (6 years ago). Every monday evening, I was running a search for men with the characteristics I wanted (distance, education etc.) and then all candidates will show up in some kind of list. I would click on the first profile and then click the next button until the last profile, thus viewing ALL of them. Problem is that many on the list were the same men (or most on the list) every week , with fewer new ones. So I guess all of those guys, including guys I've been on dates with and I did't want to continue or they didn't want to continue thought I viewed their profile every week and I must be obsessed with them. In fact, not only I wasn't interested, I was not even reading any of the profiles, just clicking next, so I can show up when they see who looked at their profile and thus increase my visibility. Plus, they thought I was interested in them, which prompted some to message me. Only after they messaged me, I really looked at their profile and decided if I should answer. That's exactly what happened with my husband. He said he messaged me because I showed interest first. I didn't. I clicked next and he thought I looked at his profile.
TheFinalWord Posted March 14, 2019 Posted March 14, 2019 This isn't a random profile. They went on multiple dates then she ghosted.
Author Mac0908 Posted March 15, 2019 Author Posted March 15, 2019 This isn't a random profile. They went on multiple dates then she ghosted. Someone actually read my post in detail! Bravo!! Bonus Points for @thefinalword Whats up man. I remember you from the original thread about this girl. Two cents on her viewing my profile?
crispytoast Posted March 15, 2019 Posted March 15, 2019 I think the fact she viewed your profile is a lot less meaningful than the amount you care about it. It's probably nothing, if it were something she would contact you herself. Were I you, I would forget about it and go about my daily life.
Andy_K Posted March 15, 2019 Posted March 15, 2019 Curiosity. Nothing more. Plenty of times I see OLD profiles of girls I've been on a date with before. Often I'll have a look at their profile to see if they've changed it, added pictures, see if it reflects what they were like when we met, or whatever else. It doesn't mean I lay awake at night thinking about whether I should've seen them again.
basil67 Posted March 15, 2019 Posted March 15, 2019 Someone actually read my post in detail! Bravo!! Bonus Points for @thefinalword Whats up man. I remember you from the original thread about this girl. Two cents on her viewing my profile? I read your post in detail. I can also spend two weeks intimately involved in a book and not recall having read it till I re-read the blurb.
littleblackheart Posted March 15, 2019 Posted March 15, 2019 (edited) So did she click on it once, or has she been stalking you? It's hard to tell, the way you describe it. Either way, maybe think of blocking her yourself, so you don't get dragged back into it? It seems to be affecting you quite a bit, for something so inconsequential. Edited March 15, 2019 by littleblackheart
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