TheRainbow Posted February 17, 2019 Share Posted February 17, 2019 (edited) He sounds like an *******. As as woman are all ready insecure. I gained 30 pounds in the last six months, and I feel fat, and I'd be even more insecure if m husband were to tell me so. If it has never been an issue since you met him, I would consider if he's using your weight as an excuse to cover up something he is doing. Edited February 17, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 2 Link to post Share on other sites
The Dude Abides Posted February 17, 2019 Share Posted February 17, 2019 Hello OP Another vote here for telling this guy to hit the road. In no way is any of this acceptable and certainly not something a loving spouse should subject his spouse to. The only exception would of course be if there are health concerns and in that case it would be handled with support, love, care and tact. Remember for every guy out there who likes the supermodel physique :rolleyes:on a woman, there is another guy who likes, what my mother used to call, a "full figured woman" This Dude happens to like women who are soft and curvy. Take care of yourself as best you can, and especially your mental and emotional health (you deserve it). And being a woman who is filled out, healthy and happy with herself is sexy enough for many men. None of us are in high school anymore and many of us don't look like it. That's life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
grays Posted February 17, 2019 Share Posted February 17, 2019 I’m so sorry he did this to you. I’ve been there and it’s a horrible feeling. I weighed 120 pounds when I met my ex-h of 25 years, gained weight over the years. But he told me around year 12 that my ass was so big when he met me that he was scared of it and actually spent several sessions talking with his therapist about it. I wish I hadn’t stayed with him one more minute. Never felt sexy or desirable with him after that. But a lot of men do like my ass. Actually just this week had a really hot 6’4” NFL tight end, 15 years younger than me, texting me about how he’s been thinking about my ass! It’s a good one! lol He might think you’re unattractive but that doesn’t mean you are. That’s about him not you. My ex left me right after I had lost a bunch of weight — for a friend of ours. For four months after I found out about them he hemmed and hawed, didn’t know which one of us he wanted because on the one hand he loved me and she didn’t have as good boobs and on the other she was shiny and new. He’s still with her four years later but I have no doubt that he has a list of things, I guess boobs at the top, that he doesn’t like about her, physical and non-physical. And that’s just gonna be who is no matter who he’s with. I hope you don’t stay with this guy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted February 17, 2019 Share Posted February 17, 2019 It sounds like he's gaslighting you. Do you notice any suspicious behaviour on his part recently? Link to post Share on other sites
LastStraw Posted February 17, 2019 Share Posted February 17, 2019 But he told me around year 12 that my ass was so big when he met me that he was scared of it and actually spent several sessions talking with his therapist about it. :lmao: Sorry but dying laughing reading this - WTH ca be so scary about an ass to justify a therapy session lol.. My guess is when you start disliking someone, you find ways to justify that, and body shape is one of the easiest things to blame your declining attraction on... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 17, 2019 Share Posted February 17, 2019 (edited) I’m so sorry he did this to you. I’ve been there and it’s a horrible feeling. I weighed 120 pounds when I met my ex-h of 25 years, gained weight over the years. But he told me around year 12 that my ass was so big when he met me that he was scared of it and actually spent several sessions talking with his therapist about it. sorry you went through all that. You know he doesn't know what love is when his reason for his decisions is about boob size. Please. Edited February 18, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SJS Posted February 20, 2019 Share Posted February 20, 2019 I know how you can lose 200# relatively quickly.... So sorry he hurt you. I agree with the other posters that it sounds like something else is going on and he's trying to deflect the issue onto you. Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted February 20, 2019 Share Posted February 20, 2019 the staring not speaking... does he do this over other matters? you need somebody you can chat with, more of a pal, imho ...ditch him Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted February 20, 2019 Share Posted February 20, 2019 OP, just out of curiosity, how long did you know him before marriage? How did the relationship develop? But, If you are happy with yourself, show him the door . . . Link to post Share on other sites
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