Mr. Lucky Posted February 28, 2019 Share Posted February 28, 2019 Example - these people aren't my friends. Since you've said this several times now, why are you surprised they won't make the effort you describe and then be there when you need them? No where have you described what you'd contribute to these relationships... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
ChatroomHero Posted February 28, 2019 Share Posted February 28, 2019 This doesn't make a lot of sense. You have people that don't care about you, but when you start dating someone, they care about impressing that person by pretending to care about you? So they are sitting around actively not caring, yet watching to see when you find a guy so they can impress him? What are you leaving out? If they won't be there for you, why would they care about impressing who you are dating or when you have a man, why would they even notice when you are with a guy or not? Are you dating rich guys and they want his money or something? What do they gain from impressing a guy you are dating? If you can answer that simple question, then what you are asking will make sense and you might get better answers. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 28, 2019 Share Posted February 28, 2019 Fair, those people are not YOUR friends. They are your ex's and they're a weird, weird bunch who care enough about him to suck up to anyone they think he might be on good terms with. But you have got to stop thinking of them or treating them like friends and go find friends of your own if possible. They sound like animals. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 28, 2019 Share Posted February 28, 2019 I agree with preraph Link to post Share on other sites
crispytoast Posted March 1, 2019 Share Posted March 1, 2019 Fair, I'm sorry that you're going through this after you and your partner split. I know how it goes to feel used by people. I wish I had a solution for you but it doesn't really get easier. Always will hurt. I don't think there's any point trying to confront them. Just focus on self-care. Hugs Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted March 1, 2019 Share Posted March 1, 2019 Human nature follows patterns. We are less valuable to people when we have nothing to bring to the table. Look it up on the internet if you don't believe me. Indeed. Friendship is about give and take. If one has nothing to bring to the table and only take, then they will be excluded. It's the internet age. There's no excuse for people not to understand anything anymore. If they cared they'd educate themselves, and no one has any excuse to ask a person who is suffering to take on the burden of trying to make them understand what they're going through, especially since trying to teach most people anything is excruciatingly painful. You're wrong. I don't have anxiety, but my son has autism. Either way, we're talking about conditions which are widely misunderstood due to the different ways it can affect people. If I looked up either condition online, I'd get a range of symptoms and personal anecdotes. Many of these things online may not apply to you. For us, I really do have to explain what's going on - and it's worth the effort because then they become more comfortable with him. Example - these people aren't my friends. At least you know that. It will save you the effort of tearing strips from them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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