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BF has a female roommate he slept with in the past


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He needs to learn that if him and the roommate need to progress in their lives then she should to move out and find a different living situation more suitable. There is low income housing, or family or another single mom that could use someone to share accommodations. OP if you accept their arrangement all you are doing is enabling. If anything this woman needs to be motivated to get herself to be more self sufficient . Nothing wrong with him watching the kids if she had to work late or go over to fix the sink, but paying the majority of the expenses and playing daddy isn’t helping anyone. Those kids are already formed a bond and if this goes on for too long the kids will have to go through the trauma of separation when she moves out. It’s not fair to anyone one. Just me but this is not the healthiest situation for those kids. I agree with the other poster, you need to lead this with an ultimatum that you can’t date him unless she finds other accommodations. Simple as that.

Edited by smackie9
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LadybugLucy

They are playing house, and her kids are seeing it. My first thought is, that both your guy friend and the roommate are not thinking about the kids. Do they consider your guy friend their mom’s boyfriend? Do the kids and mom all really share a room, or does mommy sleep in the room with your guy friend? If the guy friend brings you over, how are you introduced to the kids?

 

I know you mentioned they are not his kids. However, as adults we all share a responsibility to provide a great example to the little ones we are in contact with. It just seems like the kids’ emotions and feelings may not even be considered by the adults.

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Please note: the kids are not his.

 

Doesn't matter---they're still innocent in all of this and don't deserve to be called out of their names.

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I wouldn't call it another chance. Just sex and fishing, nothing else. I like him and he knows exactly how I feel about the sitch. I've also made it clear that I'm going to date other people. I'm not going to stress over it anymore. People are going to do what they going to do. It'll fizzle out and I won't be surprised. He's not meeting my family or my friends so it's definitely a FWB.

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  • 2 weeks later...
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smackie9 - totally. It's done. I tried for a few weeks but I just couldn't do it, not even the FWB. I got too attached to let it be casual. Oh well, movin' on.

 

Thanks everyone for their insight. I appreciate it.

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