No_Go Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 I'm dating an amazing man who will soon have his birthday. One thing that I noticed about him from the start is he's always used to be in the giving role, especially when it comes to services, his family and his ex's family just plain used him on their own accord and since he's very handy and never says no... his wellbeing always has been the last concern. He's not used to get anything, to the point I can see it makes him uncomfortable. He's in a point of his life where he has it all, no real need of anything, and he's borderline hoarder He's extremely low key in terms of things that he gets for himself, clothes, accessories etc, he seems to be the type that can't care less. I wonder how to make his day memorable without overloading him (he basically expects nothing by default). I'm personally not a sappy person at all and very bad at gift selecting/giving so I feel a bit clueless how to organize it. I've been thinking of taking him on a surprise dinner in a place that I know he enjoys, where actually our romance started so it's memory loaded, but what else? I know very well his interests but I'm pretty clueless in the fields of his major hobbies. How to extract what he may like as a gift without asking directly? I don't want to be over the top because it's just so out of his style but somehow want to make it all about him on the birthday day. Any ideas welcome:)
smackie9 Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 For the man who has everything I suggest you go out and buy some sexy lingerie, and surprise him that way. 3
Gaeta Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 When we have everything we cherish creating new memories. I suggest you take him to a place to eat he enjoys then a romantic night in a hotel room. 1
d0nnivain Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 A nice dinner, some type of dessert with a candle so he can make a wish, something to unwrap even just a $20 shirt then an evening of some loving. Next year when you are celebrating his birthday together for the 2nd time you can be more elaborate. 1
Author No_Go Posted July 9, 2018 Author Posted July 9, 2018 Dinner in the special place and nice lingerie & bedroom activities granted Can't do a hotel room night unfortunately due to lots of pet responsibilities (I currently have 2, he has 4 + several fosters... LOL we're very stuck not to get out of town for over a day anytime soon ) Would that be enough or shall I throw an additional surprise... still thinking what can this be?
Author No_Go Posted July 9, 2018 Author Posted July 9, 2018 No_go how long you've been dating now? Hard to set a 'start date' because it transitioned very smoothly from a friendship, but we started going on dates in the very end of last year, escalated to physical in February. So about half an year, a little over that by the birthday time.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 Local live dinner theatre? Painting class? A day-long road rally for charity? Look around your area for "experiences." 1
d0nnivain Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 Would that be enough or shall I throw an additional surprise... still thinking what can this be? Yes dinner & lingerie should be enough. Again this is your 1st birthday together. Don't go so crazy you can't top it next year or when you get to a decade change. I think a little something to unwrap & a home made dessert should be just fine. 1
Gaeta Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 Dinner in the special place and nice lingerie & bedroom activities granted Can't do a hotel room night unfortunately due to lots of pet responsibilities (I currently have 2, he has 4 + several fosters... LOL we're very stuck not to get out of town for over a day anytime soon ) Would that be enough or shall I throw an additional surprise... still thinking what can this be? Oh I understand! you'll both need to find a pet sitter you trust for those occasional weekends get away. Those weekends are important to keep the relationship exciting. I am very lucky I have my daughter. When we want to go away she stays at my home and her bf comes along. I am overly emotionally involved when it comes to my dog, I only trust her. As for his gift, keep in mind this is fairly new and you don't want to do too much or spend too much, even if you can afford it. 1
JuneL Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 Personally, I appreciate the thoughtfulness more. So, say, if he loves coffee, then you can paint him a coffee mug (you can do this in a pottery place) and fill the mug with some exotic coffee beans that he can't get from the usual places. Of course you can still take him to dinner and enjoy a lovely evening, but that's more generic in my opinion. As another example, I know you're not into cooking, but if you go out of your way to bake me a simply birthday cake from scratch, I would really appreciate your thoughtfulness if I were your bf. 1
Author No_Go Posted July 9, 2018 Author Posted July 9, 2018 I really want to do the home-made cake actually:) I guess still enough time to practice few recipes and it them myself if they fail LOL Personally, I appreciate the thoughtfulness more. So, say, if he loves coffee, then you can paint him a coffee mug (you can do this in a pottery place) and fill the mug with some exotic coffee beans that he can't get from the usual places. Of course you can still take him to dinner and enjoy a lovely evening, but that's more generic in my opinion. As another example, I know you're not into cooking, but if you go out of your way to bake me a simply birthday cake from scratch, I would really appreciate your thoughtfulness if I were your bf.
olivetree Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 I vote for non-consumerism... You like to hike right? It's the summer Go for a nice full day hike, pack a nice lunch for the two of you. Go for dinner at a spot he loves or a new spot you think he'll love. Then give him a massage at home and have some fun in the bedroom. If you want to give him something on top of that, then how about tickets to a concert or a getaway in the future? 1
Author No_Go Posted July 9, 2018 Author Posted July 9, 2018 Thanks - adding cake & something small wrapped to the list, maybe an experience for the weekend after too:) Ouch actually the weekend after I have a 'complication' (guests) but that's a whole other topic ... But yeah, hike/picnic will be great, just need to think of a new place because he's the local one and knows the area much better than me...
Author No_Go Posted July 9, 2018 Author Posted July 9, 2018 Oh, lucky you! I can perfectly understand how you get emotionally involved with your dog, they become like family members:) My dog is still a puppy so can't really stay alone or go with strangers, and his dog is a gentle giant so not many people can handle him... Cats are easier, mine can stay a weekend home alone, however, one of his is old and sick though and needs special attention. He's usually having dog fosters too and some are aggressive or too shy so again can't be left to the care of an average petsitter... Well, I'm sure we'll figure it out sooner or later. For now vacation getaways are just in the dreamworld - It's not only the pets:) He's freshly divorced, he's not talking about it but I'm sure emotionally still has a lot of healing to go through. On top has a sibling going through very rough situation health wise so needs to stay around... I've also made a massive career switch a couple of months ago, and still speeding up so I'm not sure I can even take a long weekend yet. But in these far from easy circumstances he has been great, so I have no doubt we'll figure it out with getaways and vacations not too long from now. That among other reasons is I want to make whatever birthday date we end up getting as perfect as possible. He has also helped me so much with the house that honestly, even if we weren't dating, I'd feel doing something bigger to say thank you:) Oh I understand! you'll both need to find a pet sitter you trust for those occasional weekends get away. Those weekends are important to keep the relationship exciting. I am very lucky I have my daughter. When we want to go away she stays at my home and her bf comes along. I am overly emotionally involved when it comes to my dog, I only trust her. As for his gift, keep in mind this is fairly new and you don't want to do too much or spend too much, even if you can afford it.
Author No_Go Posted July 9, 2018 Author Posted July 9, 2018 a steak dinner and a movie with sex for dessert LOL that's every man's classic I figured:D 1
coolheadal Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 I'm dating an amazing man who will soon have his birthday. One thing that I noticed about him from the start is he's always used to be in the giving role, especially when it comes to services, his family and his ex's family just plain used him on their own accord and since he's very handy and never says no... his wellbeing always has been the last concern. He's not used to get anything, to the point I can see it makes him uncomfortable. He's in a point of his life where he has it all, no real need of anything, and he's borderline hoarder He's extremely low key in terms of things that he gets for himself, clothes, accessories etc, he seems to be the type that can't care less. I wonder how to make his day memorable without overloading him (he basically expects nothing by default). I'm personally not a sappy person at all and very bad at gift selecting/giving so I feel a bit clueless how to organize it. I've been thinking of taking him on a surprise dinner in a place that I know he enjoys, where actually our romance started so it's memory loaded, but what else? I know very well his interests but I'm pretty clueless in the fields of his major hobbies. How to extract what he may like as a gift without asking directly? I don't want to be over the top because it's just so out of his style but somehow want to make it all about him on the birthday day. Any ideas welcome:) Well why don't you get him award, ribbon or small keep me sake. I use to give those to the women I was with. This means lot more that other gifts. Something to show your man how much he means to you. Need to go to a specialty or engraving shop to get this.. Something a little more personal from you to him a his birthday.
Happy Lemming Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 LOL that's every man's classic I figured:D My birthday is coming up in a couple of months and that's all I want. I've told my girlfriend same as last year and the year before and the year before that, etc. Steak and sex, movie is optional.
Lotsgoingon Posted July 10, 2018 Posted July 10, 2018 I have a new form of a present I can request thanks to LS: Steak and sex. I hope I don't utter that phrase by mistake in a diner. It's quite catchy. 1
Veronica73 Posted July 10, 2018 Posted July 10, 2018 What about a hot air balloon ride? I think "memorable experience" dates are awesome. 1
greymatter Posted July 10, 2018 Posted July 10, 2018 I don't think men are the only ones who can appreciate steak and sex as a birthday lineup. 3
Author No_Go Posted July 10, 2018 Author Posted July 10, 2018 Ahh I'd appreciate steak & sex for my own birthday too Just probably in reverse order because I question the quality of sex post-feast Experiences are great dates, but maybe for the year after. We've done skydiving and it was cool, except how sick I was afterwards. 1
Author No_Go Posted July 10, 2018 Author Posted July 10, 2018 So he's a 'cancer' in the zodiac? What are you? He’s Leo, I’m just planning early I’m a Scorpio. Is that a good match? Funnily 3 men I’ve been into i the recent years (out of 5-6) are born within the same week of July. Can this be a coincidence ?
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