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I never doubted her before....now I cant stop


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  • 2 weeks later...
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For what its worth...here was her last email to me

 

 

" Hello my sweet baby. I love you so much. I struggle to find the words that would convey my deepest feelings for you. You are my life… My beautiful man… My soulmate… The air that I breathe… My reason for living. I wish that I could be with you every minute of the day. It is so hard to be apart from you when my longing for you is so deep. You know you really are the man of my dreams… I am always holding on for the next time that I can see you in person and love you up close ... I feel so vulnerable sometimes. It’s like I always look so forward to seeing you but I fear that the goodbye that is inevitable will break me ...you really do have all of my heart. I try to be so strong for you always. I can never regret the unfolding of my life and my choices ... my children are a result of all of my choices and I am so grateful for them. Secretly though, I wonder sometimes how life might have been had I met you when we were younger.. it is a mute point, however, and so I quickly dismiss all thoughts of it and instead think of how wonderful it is to have you now... and to look forward to our future. In my heart I am as committed to you as if I were your wife ... I honor you completely and my souls is bound to yours...my life, my love, my heart is yours... "

 

 

So - do you think she still just playing me??

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ExpatInItaly

Actions speak louder than words. Do her actions support those words?

 

Look OP, you don't need to convince us that she's not playing you. At the end of the day, it doesn't make a lick of difference what we think. It's what you think. If you think she's honorable and this is all working well, then you don't need to run here to post proof of it.

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Man you shouldn't go putting her name and personal emails all over the internet, wtf,

 

But yeah , god knows why you'd tell her to go on a date , if you can survive between visits then so can she.

Agree about the house time thing too, dunno what the answer would be but putting off being together for even more years after all this time, asking for trouble.

Edited by Chilli
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Unfortunately, I am going to add to your angst. Her e-mails?! Her e-mails read like e-mails a married person sends to the other woman or other man to keep her/him stringing along while the married person remains in a committed relationship with the spouse. It is just enough of a carrot to dangle to keep you around. Ugh. I think she is seeing other people.

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Lotsgoingon

Wow poetic and beautiful note.

 

I'll be honest ... I might be a little freaked out by that note. It's so beautiful and airy. The challenge of relationships is to take in her love and stay grounded.

 

And if you ever feel unworthy of this love, that's a problem. I think that's how you might have gotten to your foolish dating suggestion.

 

Perhaps you felt unworthy of this love? Or paralyzed by it? Or feeling that her love requires some extraordinary gesture?

 

Beautiful note.

 

Ok .. OK ... here are my only quibbles.

 

Personally, the note little too vague for the type of note that really would move me. Her words are so ethereal, so up in the clouds ... I would want the person to speak about specific qualities I have ... that make me a soul mate ... specific and concrete strengths and acts of mine. But that's me.

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