Versacehottie Posted June 18, 2018 Share Posted June 18, 2018 Agree with K. So here's the thing: you need to enforce your personal boundaries. Some people are excellent at this--others not so much. Rather than get caught up in other people's interpretations of what is right/wrong (i.e. your bf, your co-worker), just think about yourself and how it makes you feel and if you are being reasonable not hotheaded. I think saying something like "this is not something i want in my life". It helps to literally think of it as a line drawn in the sand. You are determining what you do and don't want in your life. And you reject this behavior of his and his judgment making skills. You can (and lots of ppl here think you should) take it the step further that due to him doing these behaviors he can no longer be in your life as a bf. But first start with the behavior and whether it meets your standards of how you see your life and your relationships going. If not, draw a boundary. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author loney_girl Posted June 18, 2018 Author Share Posted June 18, 2018 Yes well I've officially written off that friend. That other woman from the BBQ is another coworker who I don't know at all. I saw her later on today stop into my friends cubicle and she peeked her head up and looked at me and then they started whispering. I felt like I was back in high school. As for my boyfriend (now ex), I spoke to him today and let him know I felt about this whole situation. He doesn't even remember the situation or who the woman was says she meant nothing and it was a drunken mistake..... I asked him how he would feel if the situation were reversed and he said he would be pissed. He said he was too drunk and got bratty. Says he feels he need a to "pull ****" like that to get my attention. I told him to grow the hell up and that I was done with his ****. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted June 18, 2018 Share Posted June 18, 2018 Yes well I've officially written off that friend. That other woman from the BBQ is another coworker who I don't know at all. I saw her later on today stop into my friends cubicle and she peeked her head up and looked at me and then they started whispering. I felt like I was back in high school. As for my boyfriend (now ex), I spoke to him today and let him know I felt about this whole situation. He doesn't even remember the situation or who the woman was says she meant nothing and it was a drunken mistake..... I asked him how he would feel if the situation were reversed and he said he would be pissed. He said he was too drunk and got bratty. Says he feels he need a to "pull ****" like that to get my attention. I told him to grow the hell up and that I was done with his ****. Good job !!! Please don't go back. There are plenty of young men out there that know how to behave while in a relationship and don't get stupid drunk. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted June 18, 2018 Share Posted June 18, 2018 He doesn't even remember the situation or who the woman was says she meant nothing and it was a drunken mistake..... He said he was too drunk and got bratty. Says he feels he need a to "pull ****" like that to get my attention. He doesn't remember a woman sitting on his lap feeding him chips... I don't believe that. If the problem is that he was too drunk to remember this, then he definitely has a problem with his judgment and alcohol. And, if this is him being "bratty" to get your attention, then he also lacks maturity. You did well to let this guy go... Well done. Link to post Share on other sites
bathtub-row Posted June 18, 2018 Share Posted June 18, 2018 I love the “I was too drunk” excuse. Basically what he’s saying is that all bets are off when he’s drunk and he can’t be trusted. What a child. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JDJ Posted June 18, 2018 Share Posted June 18, 2018 Lonely girl, you can bring a bag of chips to your next party and see who can attract with this method. Guys like chips! And girls between their legs, and being fed...I can see the appeal. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 18, 2018 Share Posted June 18, 2018 Really? You didn't take a picture? I'd be on the phone seeing if anyone else did, because I bet someone somewhere has a photo of that. You can't just ignore that!! At least her told her he had a girlfriend, but lordy, she was already between his legs before that happened. I mean, you MUST give him a rash of crap about that if for no other reason than entertainment purposes. Somewhere in there, ask him how he'd feel if you were drunk and had some guy between your legs. Link to post Share on other sites
LurkerXX Posted June 19, 2018 Share Posted June 19, 2018 Do you live in a small town? Even if you do, pull out all stops possible to find new friends...and leave the cheater boyfriend. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted June 19, 2018 Share Posted June 19, 2018 Yes well I've officially written off that friend. That other woman from the BBQ is another coworker who I don't know at all. I saw her later on today stop into my friends cubicle and she peeked her head up and looked at me and then they started whispering. I felt like I was back in high school. As for my boyfriend (now ex), I spoke to him today and let him know I felt about this whole situation. He doesn't even remember the situation or who the woman was says she meant nothing and it was a drunken mistake..... I asked him how he would feel if the situation were reversed and he said he would be pissed. He said he was too drunk and got bratty. Says he feels he need a to "pull ****" like that to get my attention. I told him to grow the hell up and that I was done with his ****. You also dodged a bullet... this guy has a severe drinking problem. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted June 19, 2018 Share Posted June 19, 2018 (edited) Yes well I've officially written off that friend. That other woman from the BBQ is another coworker who I don't know at all. I saw her later on today stop into my friends cubicle and she peeked her head up and looked at me and then they started whispering. I felt like I was back in high school. I knew it!!!!! Chances are, the chick was her cousin or niece or friend or someone she knows and that's why she seems to be defending her and putting this all on you--that's how that game gets run. As for my boyfriend (now ex), I spoke to him today and let him know I felt about this whole situation. He doesn't even remember the situation or who the woman was says she meant nothing and it was a drunken mistake..... I asked him how he would feel if the situation were reversed and he said he would be pissed. He said he was too drunk and got bratty. Says he feels he need a to "pull ****" like that to get my attention. I told him to grow the hell up and that I was done with his ****. And he's a drunk who plays manipulation games. You've dodged a bullet here, my dear. This would have been a constantly repeating occurrence and it would have aged you before your time. Edited June 19, 2018 by kendahke Link to post Share on other sites
heavenonearth Posted June 19, 2018 Share Posted June 19, 2018 I had an ex who would pull stuff like this ALL THE TIME. Even if there were photos on his phone of girls kissing his cheeks at some party he went to, he would find an excuse. And then he would make me feel bad for even doubting him! Yup. Your NOW ex-boyfriend is a douche bag and he will not change. He cannot take responsibility for his actions. Someone like that is toxic and you need to get rid of him! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
babysacay Posted June 24, 2018 Share Posted June 24, 2018 I had an ex who would pull stuff like this ALL THE TIME. Even if there were photos on his phone of girls kissing his cheeks at some party he went to, he would find an excuse. And then he would make me feel bad for even doubting him! Yup. That sounds like gaslighting! But I agree with this and what everyone else said. He's immature at best and toxic at worst. Either way, you deserve better! Link to post Share on other sites
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