heavenonearth Posted October 26, 2017 Share Posted October 26, 2017 I would agree with most of the posts above that you should break up with her gently, but go no contact afterwards. Don't give her any false hope that she could still get you back and grow dependent on you. If she ever gets cured for her mental anxiety she will realize you have been doing her a big favor not contacting her. Best of luck. This. When my current boyfriend broke up with his ex, they went No Contact, and only had contact when it was absolutely necessary (bc of logistics or anything).It was actually her choice, as he didnt mind being in touch. But he agreed in hindsight that it was better this way. It gives the dumpee time to heal and move on faster and not be getting any false hope. Link to post Share on other sites
tart6245 Posted October 30, 2017 Share Posted October 30, 2017 Ive been in this place before. She must be going through a lot. Don't leave her at this time in her life. I would suggest going to couples therapy. I tried this a few times with my girlfriend and it didn't help because she felt the therapist was taking my side whenever they would try to give perspective to her feelings. The last session we had, she ended up walking out and telling me she wanted a new therapist because this one was biased. I'm in the same boat as the OP. I don't want to abandon her at her time of need but I also realize I can't fix her problems for her - and perhaps a break up would finally give her the push she needs to improve herself. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted October 30, 2017 Share Posted October 30, 2017 Unless she's your wife, couple's therapy is a bad idea. That's for issues pertaining to two mentally healthy people who are at an impasse they both want to get through. Individual therapy is what is needed and has been needed. Putting your life on hold and living a life of quiet desperation is not the answer. A drowning person will end up drowning you too while you're trying to save them; especially when you don't know what to do to save them because you're not trained in mental illness issues. Leave the saving of her to the professionals and her family. Link to post Share on other sites
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