kendahke Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 This is my experience, too, and I'm a woman. What I do get when I get messages--98% of them are scammers using stolen pictures. They're so obvious and don't try to hide the face that they're scammers. You can't be who you're not; and a engineer with a master's degree doesn't talk like he's fresh off the boat from a foreign country. The next 1% are angry, bitter or having mental issues and I'm not here for that. The last 1% read and ignore my messages. I seriously don't know why I even bother. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 (edited) Women in OLD get dozens or hundreds of messages. Even if you're a good candidate for them, there's a good chance you won't g. Some women. Women in a certain age bracket with a particular pedigree get this. They are a hot commodity and therefore, every other man is also pursuing. It's a numbers game. So the ones who look as if they've got more to offer are going to get the interest. If you don't have more to offer or can't stand out, then... Women in general do not get this treatment. That is a lazy fallacy. Edited August 21, 2017 by kendahke Link to post Share on other sites
Larryville Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 this is case in point why OLD is a waste of time for most people This is the sad case about OLD. ALL of these sites know what the problem is and clearly know that most people are frustrated, and to be honest that works for them because they know that no matter how pissed folks get, or frustrated or how much spam you get.. you’ll be back, most of us keep trying which is exactly why I wish I can go back in time and launch an OLD site. The only industry where failure is a welcomed reality. Link to post Share on other sites
S_A Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 With online dating I've got about a 5% response rate with about 25% of messages not even read. Most of my messages are just ignored. After looking at all the pictures and reading through the profile this is my basic messages: "How's it going username? Sounds like you're really passionate about xyz. How often do you get a chance to do xyz (or some question about it). I'm interested in x,y,z as well and can't wait to hear more about your experience with it." Obviously every case it different, but in general that's what I've been doing. Is there anything obviously wrong with that or is there something major I should add? Hate the opening message. I could give you one but the problem is that the message is not you. And any message I send out would never be a cookie-cutter type like the one you quoted. I'm sure a lot of girls get messages along the lines of what you cited. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 max3732 This is what I told myself about OLD when I was upset that I didn't get more messages or meaningful responses: On OLD you see lots of pictures & have seemingly limitless choices. But on any given day you pass dozens if not hundreds of people. All of those people see you & interact with you (even if it's just the unconscious social norm of not walking into you). Most of them don't stop & talk to you. They look; they walk on by. many don't even smile or say excuse me. OLD is a bit like that. Everyone you see on line won't give you more thought then not literally walking into you. It also creeps me out about this missed connection feature on match.com From the commercial it seems like your phone records your location then sends you the profile of somebody who was in your proximity the day before. Just yuck. Link to post Share on other sites
Larryville Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 What I do get when I get messages--98% of them are scammers using stolen pictures. They're so obvious and don't try to hide the face that they're scammers. I think I mentioned this is another thread, scammers don’t necessarily use pictures of “hot” people, the profiles are very generic, the people being very “normal” but the thing I notice those profiles usually only have (1) picture. On OLD you see lots of pictures & have seemingly limitless choices. However I have mentioned before just because you get on an OLD site does not mean all of those people are available to you. Google: Amy Webb: How I hacked online dating | TED Talk | TED.com If you take every attribute of yourself, height weight, religion, age put ever every characteristic about yourself any one of us really only has actually a few choices of people available to us. If you are a guy 5’ 6” tall any women taller (maybe one of two) won’t date you, they are not available to you, yet a guy will still pursue. Why even pursue women who won’t under any circumstances respond to you? That is where the frustration begins. Everyone you see on line won't give you more thought then not literally walking into you. Because society has become so detached, people have their heads in their cell phones and not looking at the world around them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 Hate the opening message. I could give you one but the problem is that the message is not you. And any message I send out would never be a cookie-cutter type like the one you quoted. I'm sure a lot of girls get messages along the lines of what you cited. Yep. You can always tell if a "template" has been used/edited. Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 I automatically block any guy who sends anything like the above examples. So are examples I don't use those just example.. I would say something about their profile in relationship with me. Hi, free to chat.. I see we have a few things in common. Then I would say a few of them. Telling her she has a nice smile and etc.. Everyone going to reply differently. I am not on OLD anymore I found me someone else real world the old ways do work ask a girl out and she said yes go from there... LOL Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted August 21, 2017 Share Posted August 21, 2017 The "automatic" people on OLD don't help matters. If you get a template message you don't know that the person sent it to every profile out there. They may be shy / not a smooth communicator who worked hard to craft an opening gambit & adopt it for each person. People who "automatically" don't respond to certain things they don't like even if everything else is good, shoot themselves in the foot. I'm not a fan of the shirtless photos or the bragging ones in front of the hot car but if everything else was otherwise interesting, that single less-then-perfect thing is no reason to automatically ignore the person. When I saw the car pictures, I'd go right for them: will you balk if I ask you to ride in my [insert name of what I drive], was my usual opening line. Would you like to see a picture of my car? Almost every guy I said that to confessed it wasn't his car. I had one picture of me in a fancy party dress draped over a Ferrari. Ferrari & Rolls Royce had been sponsors of the event I was at & part of the fun was taking pictures with the cars. The photo wasn't on my profile but I remember sending it to some guy with a lot of car pictures with the message: my car would like to race yours. It was his car & it was his way of weeding out gold diggers. Women who focused solely on the car didn't get a response. He wrote back to me because he got that I was kind of making fun of him for the car pic. We chatted for a while but due to the distance never ended up meeting. He wasn't a bad guy even though he seemed to be leading with his wallet. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted August 24, 2017 Share Posted August 24, 2017 Are women getting so many messages that they don't even click on them? apparently the good looking ones are getting a lot of messages 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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