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Does OLD make us too picky?


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Interesting question. When I go to a party or gathering, I tend to talk to those who happen to be near me, attractive or not. I don't scan the whole room looking for the hottest women and make a beeline to them. Okay maybe I do notice, but realistically I might not ever talk to her because she was busy chatting or I was engaged with talking to other people and there went the night all of a sudden. All about timing.

 

It's not that OLD makes you pickier. It's that it takes no effort to say hi to the most attractive women and a lot of guys have this illusion that she is actually accessible. OLD sites want guys to think this. And so her inbox gets flooded. In the real world, it's impossible for all the guys to talk to one woman in a party so OLD is like defying the laws of physics.

 

A while ago, I messaged a really attractive woman on OLD and it said "Inbox full". I laughed. That shattered the illusion that I had any chance and I never looked at her profile again. If guys really understood this, they might message some of the women whose inbox isn't flooded.

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It doesn't make a difference for me.

 

Whether IRL or online dating, i'm looking for the same things.

 

In fact, with online dating I often tried to force myself to date guys i wasn't into. Now I know better what I need in a man, and I won't force anything.

 

I'd also say i had many of the same problems with online guys and guys IRL.

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I find the problems exactly the same IRLD and OLD.

 

My main one is I can't say 'no' and keep trying if the guy is persistent even if I spot incompatibility signs... so the opposite of too picky.

 

 

It doesn't make a difference for me.

 

Whether IRL or online dating, i'm looking for the same things.

 

In fact, with online dating I often tried to force myself to date guys i wasn't into. Now I know better what I need in a man, and I won't force anything.

 

I'd also say i had many of the same problems with online guys and guys IRL.

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Cookiesandough

I think you're probably right that 'back in the day ' people were a lot more inclined to settle for much less than they do these days where the internet has opened up many more opportunities to meet people.Most people have adapted to the abundance technology has created, and by extension go through dating w/ a more fine toothed comb.

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Have done online dating. It truly is a giant waste of time for a man to do.

 

Unless you are a male model you will barely get any responses back from women.

 

It is the single biggest thing that has made dating even worse than it already was.

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I dont see a big difference between the guys who try to talk to me online and in person.

 

Ive met my share of guys in person who were waaaaaay overshooting. I mean to the point of absurdity. In fact, id say the less attractive a man is the higher he will shoot and more aggressive he is. Interacting with them in person is worse bc they see your kindness as sexual interest.

 

So again, no, i dont think old necessarily makes people more picky. I dont see a big difference.

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staggerlee71

OLD.... Sometimes I feel like there is no difference between picking a puppy or a man. I've read so many profiles where the criteria is sooo specific that superman would have a hard time meting the criteria.

 

How many times have i read: I am looking for a guy who is blonde hair #5.0, 6 5/16 inches tall, size 11 shoe, 34 inch waist etc.

 

Oh, as far as reading womens profiles, they are truly all the same: I like the beach in summer and mountains in winter, I love to go out but also stay in, I like to dress up and wear jeans and a tee., I love to laugh but I am serious too, I love a spontaneous guy but like to make plans...on and on.

 

In fact, swiping pictures might not be all that far off base. At least you know they are attracted to you so its a matter trying to start a discourse. Of

course god forbid your not witty with your opening email. aren't we all on OLD to see if there is a connection? how in the world can you begin that process if you judge the opening email. There are a million reason why that really shouldn't matter.

 

I was just as guilty a few years back but have really opened up to chatting with a wider range of women. I am chatting with one women now who I am not sure about physically but since I decided to open up my more superficial criteria, it turns out she is really cool gal.

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OLD is a business and it is setup to keep you wanting more. It's not meant to find you a perfect match - they don't make money that way.

 

Couple this with the propensity of people to select the best option and it is a good business model. It's like going car shopping at a Ford dealership and seeing a Farrari that you can put a low bid on that might be accepted. It prevents you from buying the Ford Focus you went in for.

 

Women are artificially inflated in looks online which is why most will say "it has been a great experience". Many men are going for women less attractive than they get IRL for just sex and it gives the impression that the women are better looking than they are.

 

This is why you see the negative profiles and "not looking for hookups" on so many - yet they keep using the service in the hope they get that Farrari.

 

I'm no more picky on OLD than IRL. What I want is a girl who is a 6 or 7. What I find are girls who are 9's or who are 3's and think they are 10's. They all "love life" and are busy 24 hrs a day (mostly traveling to exotic places). I don't know if they are really like that or trying to impress guys, but I have yet to find a girl who says she goes to work, comes home and watches tv until bedtime. I would love to find one like that.

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Cookiesandough

Too many guys...

 

Since I got a good profile written I've had too many messages and date requests from too many guys who I'd like to date and I feel overwhelmed and don't know who to choose. Suffering from overchoice and indecision. Feeling stressed. Don't know who to pick so won't pick anyone. I just closed all the apps and right now I'm not sure I'll return.

 

Just thought I'd share what most women experience on there

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bluefeather
Too many guys...

 

Since I got a good profile written I've had too many messages and date requests from too many guys who I'd like to date and I feel overwhelmed and don't know who to choose. Suffering from overchoice and indecision. Feeling stressed. Don't know who to pick so won't pick anyone. I just closed all the apps and right now I'm not sure I'll return.

 

Just thought I'd share what most women experience on there

 

Ikr? I hate that all these girls wanna go out with me. It's like... make a line, ladies.

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l suffered from no choice , nope l met plenty but really , not one of those turned out to be someone l would go for in RL.

There was only one or two of those in that whole damn place out of 1,000s.

What people think is over choice ends up in disheartened burn out after a few years of it from what l've seen, especially for the girls.

l don't think the guys take it too seriously, well l know l didn't anyway it was all a bit ridiculous to me seeing the women l had to choose from on there.

l'd just talk to most of them from boredom because on mine the quality was ridiculous, lack off that is.

 

Seems to be a viscous cycle for the women though because they start of thinking it's a supermarket yet no body is chasing them out in the real world and reality ends up biting on the sites too and burn out for most from convos l had with many.

Although , there is a few around ls that eventually met their match so l guess if your one of the lucky ones and you can stick it out for yrs on end , never know l guess.

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