he won't have sex with me unless i give him money ...i'm addicted to him ...

[travelbug1996]

Learn to enjoy your own company. Just be with you.

[don't talk to me]

And he said, "You're just an idiot. Plain and simple. You also have some kind of mental issue. Like you're there but not all the way. I don't understand you sometimes."

 

 

 

 

I feel like that **** is true.

 

what a piece of sh*t!!! how dare he? your biggest fault in that story is being incredibly passive. but his? he is a complete psycho who exploits you and talks trash. how dare he compare you with the awful person he is? don't listen to a word he says. please!

[SpecialJ]

You're doing great. The reason you're struggling with having blocked him is probably partially addiction, to the sex and companionship, but also partially because he's been inconsistently nice/mean to you and also manipulative and emotionally abusive. It makes it much harder to separate when you've been on the receiving end of that for any significant amount of time. I hope you are able to find a good match quickly in regards to a therapist and keep up your courage to stay away from this awful man and rebuild your self-esteem.

[truthtripper]

Meta.morphate, it seems like you have been abused in childhood, otherwise you simply won't gravitate towards such people. The abuse is familiar to you, that's why you crave it. Us creatures of habit find comfort in the familiar, not in the unfamiliar, no matter how wonderfully comfortable the unfamiliar may be. I suffered child abuse and was in denial about it's consequences for most of my life. I also found myself in abusive relationships similar to yours. It was only when I began to make connections with my past, that I gradually learnt to value myself and treat myself with respect. This is the only way you can form healthy relationships.

[aurelius99]

If the roles were reversed here, and she would only have sex with HIM for money, people wouldn't be reacting the same. Everyone knows women have sex for money (though it's more sophisticated and never directly stated that way) but nobody seems to get outraged with that. Are we living in the days of gender equality? Then I say it's not a problem here. Women do it all the time. My ex wife would only have sex if I did home improvements around the house. That's basically the same as prostitution.

[meta.morphate]

I "relapsed" with him, and I've been absent from here because of that ...

 

 

But last night, I punched him in the face and kicked him out of my house and I have never felt so satisfied.

 

 

I've wondered all these years how the situation would end. Would he leave me, would I leave him, would I get into another relationship, would he, would he do something unforgiveable?

 

 

And finally he did.

 

 

And finally I gave him the punch in the face that he's deserved.

 

 

And that's that.

[Zahara]

Seeing how destructive you both are, I don't think a punch will change the situation but only add to the drama that you both thrive on. In the next few days you may possibly start to rethink your actions and start to feel guilt for hurting him and that you wronged him. You may feel this way now because you are fueled with anger. But those emotions will evolve into sadness, hurt, regret, etc., and the temptation to start the cycle again i.e. the need to contact for whatever reason, whether an apology or a fix.

 

Hopefully, you find your way through this and stay committed to your recovery.

Edited September 18, 2017 by Zahara

[meta.morphate]

I hear you. And I think that he probably thinks I'll be sorry, because often times, I do blow up on him as a result of my emotions and not so much his actual actions ... but this time feels different. I'm not sorry. It's been two days and usually the regret and guilt and panic would have set in but so far .. nope. I'm just really not sorry. I feel he deserved it.

 

 

I know I still need to work on myself and get into therapy to avoid getting into a similar relationship again .. I have never had a healthy relationship, but now, I don't feel scared to be alone, without him, because what he did was truly unforgiveable, and there's no part of it that I can twist around to blame on myself, to question if I'm overreacting . He will always have this evil person inside him, but I'm done with it.

[meta.morphate]

he texted me last night after I was sleeping trying to make little threats ... I rolled over and went back to sleep. and I'm not sitting here this morning debating answering or constructing answers in my head.

[stillafool]

Why don't you block him from contacting you and be done with him once and for all? Also when are you going to find a therapist?

[anika99]

What did he do that led to your punching him in the face?

[Zahara]

he texted me last night after I was sleeping trying to make little threats ... I rolled over and went back to sleep. and I'm not sitting here this morning debating answering or constructing answers in my head.

 

Why are you still accessible to him via text? Why haven't you blocked him?

 

He's done many unforgivable things -- why is this the dealbreaker? What did he do?

[Soak]

meta.morphate, i hope you are okay. You haven't checked in for a while.

 

I think you are getting into a dangerous situation. Remember on the other board, we were talking about boundaries. It's not too late to set boundaries.. You don't have to tell him, you only have to know it yourself.

 

It is time to break the 'addiction', because that's all it is. Block his number and do not initiate contact with him. You know the sort of person he is, YOU CAN DO BETTER.