deadsoul Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 Sad thing is, I'm so desperate for this cause my husband ignores me. And I'm a young beautiful woman and I feel like a good catch! But he just ignored me and I feel so alone all the time. That's why I sucked into this trap by a man who showed me what it felt like to be loved. But now I'm just more alone. Feels like I'm just not meant to be happy. Leaving husband isn't an easy option, we have 5 young children. How again has he shown you what it felt like to be loved? Because based on everything else you wrote, he hasn't shown you that at all. You are better than this. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ice3784 Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 Please go when u are not too deep yet. Please. Before your husband knows or before his wife founds out. Before its a point of no return that you will hurt urself. I had cried so much as of today im incapable to feel his love anymore even though we are still together. Cos it comes to the extend you dont know does he really cares when he was or is he speaking the truth when he speaks. Leave. While still have the chance. Live with ur husband. Leave while its still good and keep it as a memory for both of you. Before u both **** without emotion and love.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 This man does not care for you and you are right that he is using you to get aroused and taking it home to have sex with his wife. With 5 kids how do you have time for this? If you are in an unhappy marriage you would be better off to use that free time to go back to school or get a job to get out of your situation. Spending time with a man that doesn't care about you is a dead end street. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 What sort of sick person is he to lead you on like this? He is gradually getting more physically involved, getting you turned on, then withdrawing because of his 'conscience'. Yeah right! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
LivingWaterPlease Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 Loneroo, there are a lot of stories about MMs on here but this is one of the sickest MMs I've ever read about. The way you've posted that he behaves seems downright nasty to me. His poor wife. No reason for you to be jealous of this lady who is being treated so awfully. No offense but it might be worth getting into therapy in order to find out why you would accept this type of treatment. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sandylee1 Posted May 11, 2017 Share Posted May 11, 2017 What an ego boost you must be to this OAP. Having a woman 30 years his junior wanting to have sex with him... Must feel wonderful. At the moment, you do the warming up and his wife gets a supercharged husband rearing to go. She's probably having the best sex ever with your help. No wonder you feel lonely about, but how do you have the time to be lonely with 5 kids? Maybe the time you spend with him and would be better used on yourself. Maybe join a gym, take up a hobby... Something relaxing and therapeutic. The time spent with him is wasted. It's sad that you feel lonely with a husband, 5 children and him. Have you tried to communicate how you feel to your husband? If you still love him, try and make that work, because I'm sure being a single mum to 5 kids will really stress you out, if your marriage ends. Link to post Share on other sites
LivingWaterPlease Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 At the moment, you do the warming up and his wife gets a supercharged husband rearing to go. She's probably having the best sex ever with your help. . Meh...unless you call having sex based on a lie best sex, you may be right. Personally this sounds like sick sex to me and absolutely wouldn't be interested, especially with my husband. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 Meh...unless you call having sex based on a lie best sex, you may be right. Personally this sounds like sick sex to me and absolutely wouldn't be interested, especially with my husband. Well of course you wouldn't be interested if you knew about it. It's very doubtful that the wife in this situation knows anything at all about the affair or the OW and since she's in the dark she probably is enjoying the sex. Link to post Share on other sites
LivingWaterPlease Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 (edited) Well of course you wouldn't be interested if you knew about it. It's very doubtful that the wife in this situation knows anything at all about the affair or the OW and since she's in the dark she probably is enjoying the sex. Ya, guess if you're eating ice cream that tastes delicious but is laced with anthrax unbeknownst to you, you could enjoy the ice cream...but, I'd pass, thanks, and most normal people would... Same with the sex this BW is getting, ugh... Seems to me there's more than one reason to enjoy physical intimacy with a person. One reason would be because you love that person. Another reason would be because you're attracted to the person. Ideally with a married couple both reasons would come into play, no pun intended. But, given you don't love your spouse and no longer find your spouse attractive either, yet you don't want to "cheat" legalistically, you could do what this man is doing. Find someone you're attracted to, to rev up your engine before you go home to your wife so you can have a physical sexual release. Imo what this man is doing to his marriage is poisonous and will eat away at whatever is left of it, which seems to me, to be not much, given the info we have about it. Op has no reason to be jealous of the BW. OP, if this guy were with you, he'd be doing perverted things to your relationship with him just as he's doing perverse things to his R with his W unless he finds help. He seems like a very selfish bully to me and I'd be surprised if that aspect of his character isn't exemplified in other areas of his life and marriage besides the sexual. Edited May 12, 2017 by LivingWaterPlease Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted May 14, 2017 Share Posted May 14, 2017 Meh...unless you call having sex based on a lie best sex, you may be right. Personally this sounds like sick sex to me and absolutely wouldn't be interested, especially with my husband. Yeah, but the thing is his wife doesn't know any of this is happening so she is reaping the benefits of it for now. When and if she finds out she will be crushed. I'm sure his wife would pass on this as would anybody else if they knew the truth. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted May 14, 2017 Share Posted May 14, 2017 Seems to me there's more than one reason to enjoy physical intimacy with a person. One reason would be because you love that person. Another reason would be because you're attracted to the person. Ideally with a married couple both reasons would come into play, no pun intended. But, given you don't love your spouse and no longer find your spouse attractive either, yet you don't want to "cheat" legalistically, you could do what this man is doing. Find someone you're attracted to, to rev up your engine before you go home to your wife so you can have a physical sexual release. This situation aside in long marriages some couples do explore other avenues to spice up their sex lives and it's not because they no longer find their spouse attractive. Link to post Share on other sites
misspalmy Posted June 7, 2017 Share Posted June 7, 2017 I ended up telling the wife as it was doing my head in. Least im free now no lies. its loney being the other woman, its loney being single too Link to post Share on other sites
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