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Long Distance Dating - How to get him to commit


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Arieswoman

Living

 

Do I end things before they start?

 

Yes.

 

This is a none-starter.

 

Please don't tell me you've been sleeping with this guy :eek:

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  • 2 weeks later...
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livinglife2019

The guy I was dating long distance became very distant,

I got fed up of sending messages or replying to his and not hearing anything

Back for hours or days on end!

 

I finally decided I deserved better, I simply sent him a message saying

Hey, I'm sure if you haven't already, you'll going to meet someone be it in Spain or wherever your travels take you, that'll be worth taking the risk for I just don't think that person is me.

 

I also said I'd be happy to remain as friends because I do actually have fun when with him! I asked him what he thought about becoming friends but he hasn't replied to anything, he hasn't read the message yet but I can see he has been online on his WhatsApp! Its only being 2 days, but I find not replying or even acknowledging a message is rude! So should I just forget about becoming friends?

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
5 threads merged and moved to LDR ~6
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The guy I was dating long distance became very distant,

I got fed up of sending messages or replying to his and not hearing anything

Back for hours or days on end!

 

I finally decided I deserved better, I simply sent him a message saying

Hey, I'm sure if you haven't already, you'll going to meet someone be it in Spain or wherever your travels take you, that'll be worth taking the risk for I just don't think that person is me.

 

I also said I'd be happy to remain as friends because I do actually have fun when with him! I asked him what he thought about becoming friends but he hasn't replied to anything, he hasn't read the message yet but I can see he has been online on his WhatsApp! Its only being 2 days, but I find not replying or even acknowledging a message is rude! So should I just forget about becoming friends?

 

Is he being rude or ghosting? -- Both, I'd say.

 

If this is how he treats you while in a relationship, he's not likely going to be a good friend either . . .

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Yes forget about it....it will serve no purpose, he doesn't even bother to keep in touch. Make better friends elsewhere.

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The guy I was dating long distance became very distant,

I got fed up of sending messages or replying to his and not hearing anything

Back for hours or days on end!

 

I finally decided I deserved better, I simply sent him a message saying

Hey, I'm sure if you haven't already, you'll going to meet someone be it in Spain or wherever your travels take you, that'll be worth taking the risk for I just don't think that person is me.

 

I also said I'd be happy to remain as friends because I do actually have fun when with him! I asked him what he thought about becoming friends but he hasn't replied to anything, he hasn't read the message yet but I can see he has been online on his WhatsApp! Its only being 2 days, but I find not replying or even acknowledging a message is rude! So should I just forget about becoming friends?

 

Why would you want to be friends with someone that doesn't even care to stay in contact with you when he's dating you?

 

Go have fun with your true friends that enjoy and share that mutuality with you.

 

Suggesting "friends" is likely your fear of letting him go. He can never truly be a friend.

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I think that was a nice way to end it, but don't expect this guy to actually be your friend. He'll still be ignoring your messages, and it will probably get worse while you're "just friends." Delete the conversation (maybe also his number) and move on

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I wouldn't expect any return, even if he eventually reads it. I find it rude and ghosting is rude, not just ignoring you.

 

You reached out one last time, and just take comfort in that you had the respect and decency to formally end it instead of leaving him hanging, although I'm not sure he would have noticed either way. This is a lot for your own peace of mind. I wouldn't expect a friendship to evolve from this.

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ExpatInItaly

OP, this guy has been distancing himself from you for a while now.

 

You need to let it go. He isn't friend material either. Cut your losses so you don't string yourself along any further.

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