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Can I trust he wont be aggressive to me again..


ghjyklp1

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truthtripper

OP, I hope you are reading all these responses. Your boyfriend sounds like a very insecure, manipulative person. Those two traits in combination are already bad news, regardless of whether he's physically violent or not.

 

The healthy part of you knows you have to leave him, but the dysfunctional part of you(which believes you deserve the abuse) will make you stay. It all depends on which part is stronger, the healthy part or the dysfunctional part, as to what decision you'll make.

 

You can choose to listen to these posters, or stay with your boyfriend, endure the abuse and hopefully, eventually learn for yourself, the hard way.

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I am sure he is sorry. He knows he risks losing you. He has done this kind of thing several times. He turns abusive and nasty when he drinks. Can you trust him not to do it again? No.

 

I expect you have read up on the 'cycle of abuse'. Tension builds, then sometimes with drink on top, the abusive person goes into a rage and attacks. What will stop him doing this? Self-control? No, he doesn't seem to have that, especially when he drinks. The knowledge that it is wrong? No, he has already done it several times. The realisation that he has a problem? Perhaps, if he seeks help for it and takes the help.

 

Personally, I would not stay with anyone who became physically abusive. They cannot/do not control themselves when angry. Someone who behaves like your partner as crossed the line. Nothing will stop him doing it again.

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