KaliLove Posted May 17, 2014 Posted May 17, 2014 I have something of his that he actually really needs back and he sent me a nasty email ordering me to bring it back to him. I told him to either come pick it up, or to ask nicely and stop being such an a-hole. No response. Guess he doesn't want it that badly! Tough luck homeslice..if you want it, you can be a gentleman and not talk to me like I'm a dog. It's too big to mail, and he lives 5 minutes away from me. He's such a stubborn prick! Eww..how could I have ever loved him???
Erlaad Posted May 17, 2014 Posted May 17, 2014 Getting more and more exdreams these weeks. I usually read signs into things but I - will -not - submit. I know I have to forgive her, but that doesn't mean I'll break NC or go back to a person who I know now wasn't right for me. I don't know if she changed, I don't know if she has someone new (I would guess so according to past behaviours) and I do not want to know. I am a happy and complete person by my own self, I do not need her anymore. (*self training mode: on*) - Erl
Gr4veyard Posted May 17, 2014 Posted May 17, 2014 (edited) It has been 3 months. There have been some better days inbetween but now feeling depressed again thinking about him, even though its been a beautiful day today I've just been staying alone inside my house... I finally deleted him off fb. Even though I dont want to hear about him, a tiny part of me hoped for some sort of reaction from him. Of course, nothing. He was the one who didnt want me anymore, he was the one who dumped me, why should he care? I feel so sad that he doesnt care about me anymore after all what he told me before and I still care so much... I dont want to feel this way, why am I still missing him even though I dont want to get back together with him? Why do I still want to be with some person who told me that Im meant to be forever alone? He's a ****ing jerk but I cant stop thinking about the good times we had together and what we could've had... I cant focus on anything because of this... I am trying to plan the future for myself without him... I have always wanted to go as an exchange student to another country. I told him about this dream 2 days before he broke it off with me and his reaction to this made me not want to go anymore... He was eagerly encouraging me to go and I was really suprised because I thought he would be strongly against it, as he usually is when we have to be seperate for a long time. First I was happy about that he is okay with it, later I realised he probably just wanted to get me as far as possible from him already then. I'm afraid I would just be thinking about him all the time if I go and ruining my time there... Ugh I shouldn't have told him. Everything I try to plan leads to me thinking about him again... Edited May 17, 2014 by Gr4veyard
ThatOneGuyThat Posted May 17, 2014 Posted May 17, 2014 My must keep reiterating the fact that I must remain NC. I must not look at her profile and I must not contact her, it will give me no benefit. 2
freebird31 Posted May 17, 2014 Posted May 17, 2014 (edited) I feel like I have so much hate and anger for the girl who was once my "best friend." I seriously feel like I hate her. Seven years of friendship. Of being really close and last year, one year ago she was NEVER there for me during my brutal breakup. And this entire past year she has been so selfish and involved with her own boyfriend. Already confronted her before and she acted so rude. Haven't talked to her in a month now. Since the incident at her bourthday. We made amends and she said sorry, not sure if she even meant it. But we still have not talked in ONE month. Instead she continues to post pictures of her and her boyfriend and unhealthy pathetic relationship. I am so annoyed with her: what a waste of seven years. Of all the seven years of being friends I never needed her more than last year when I got my heart broken and instead she just broke my heart along with him. It's pathetic . And I try to tell myself that maybe I'm better off. But I'm not even happy. Haven't been happy in so long. I don't feel any pain any more. From everything. The break up and the times my "best friend" at the time hurt me. I'm just so tired. I feel so dull all the time. I have no passion or any enthusiasm in my life. And everything that happened I blame her for part of it. Had she just been a good friend like all the times I was ALWAYS there for her, helped her been the first person to help her, everything wouldn't be this way. I just suddenly feel this intense anger towards her. I almost feel like I hate her.:/ It was already hard getting over the breakup with him, I feel like this is a new breakup. Like CMON when do I get a break here. This is BS. I sometimes wish I never met the people who hurt me. I hate them. She was supposed to be my best friend the persons can always count on. She used to be the person id always count on. We were sisters. Our bond was seriously irreplaceable. Funny how it can all be just ripped out of your life. God this year has been too hard. I'm getting over my ex, but i feel like I'm still coping with issues with my "friend" and even if we don't talk anymore it's a whole another break up but this time with a friend of 7 years. My he majority of my life has been nothing but coping with loss. I feel so much anger right now Edited May 17, 2014 by freebird31
Itspointless Posted May 17, 2014 Posted May 17, 2014 I feel pathetic, I still miss her. sometimes I think I am over it for a couple of days, but every time I just fool myself. Everyday she keeps appearing in my mind. I want to forget, I am sick and tired of it. 3
HumiliatedGrapes Posted May 18, 2014 Posted May 18, 2014 I was wondering, did anyone feel awful when they first began dating again? I'm talking about dumpees, not dumpers. Its been three months since he ended the relationship and I have four guys interested in me so far I'm only texting them in a light hearted way (although I'm beginning to feel a connection with one guy) but they're beginning to ask me out on dates. I don't think Im ready for that so I won't, but what really bothers me is I think of my ex when they ask me, I feel guilty... as though I'd be hurting him and that's crazy, right? he broke up with me.. and more to the point, he was unfaithful during our relationship so why am I feeling like this?
namastemeow Posted May 18, 2014 Posted May 18, 2014 Day 6 we decided to be friends because we both still love each other, he just cant get over the guilty feeling that he cheated on me while our relationship is not good. I decided that maybe i will not get back together with him in the future. But only god can decide, right? If we're meant to be we will be together. but right now i dont know. I still miss him though. We still live together just as roomate because it needs a long time for me to move all of my stuff to my parents house. i only go to apartment for like 3 or 4 days in a week other than that im in my parents house. To be honest despite any mistakes that he made, i really do miss him, i miss us, i miss taking care of him. His nose keeps bleeding for like 3 days after we decide of breakup. probably because hes so stressed about him cheating. i cant stand to see him like that but he wants some distance from me. im really really sad. i tried to smile in front of him. but then i got sad. really really sad. i cried too many times. part of me wants to let him go part of me want to be with him...
namastemeow Posted May 18, 2014 Posted May 18, 2014 I feel pathetic, I still miss her. sometimes I think I am over it for a couple of days, but every time I just fool myself. Everyday she keeps appearing in my mind. I want to forget, I am sick and tired of it. same here, this feeling sucks. 1
L1ght Posted May 18, 2014 Posted May 18, 2014 I feel good. I love this time of year. I am where I'm supposed to be at this stage in my life.
greenbee81 Posted May 18, 2014 Posted May 18, 2014 The sadness is great today... Don't want to work today.
Haydn Posted May 18, 2014 Posted May 18, 2014 Tell me Fred. It will improve.I really thought it would not. But it does. Slowly. Hang in there friend. One word.. ****. 1
SpiralOut Posted May 18, 2014 Posted May 18, 2014 I saw him last night even though he is bad for me. I feel pathetic.
elseaacych Posted May 18, 2014 Posted May 18, 2014 I wrote another rant on my thread in the break up forum. I don't know if it helped me feel any better. Any more now, I don't think I miss him. I just feel lost and lonely.
AnyaNova Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 Tell me Fred. It will improve.I really thought it would not. But it does. Slowly. Hang in there friend. This is very true! As long as I'm not nutritionally depleted, I'm quite happy and fine again.
freebird31 Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 I miss him. I wonder if he thinks about me too after all this time apart. I'm moving on but doesn't take the feelings of missing him away from time to time.
namastemeow Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 Day 7, Missing him too much. I keep failing at stop messaging him. He said he misses me too but he cheated on me so he has to leave. too many pictures of us in my phone. Too much memories in my brain. i miss him so much i just want him to hug me and never let go. Some time i feel like i have to move on then at some point i just became desperate, devastated, miserable. Knowing that i cant come home to him again hurts so much.
Allyd12 Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 Day 8, miss her so ****ing badly. Keep remembering all the times we spent together camping and all the memories keep playing in my head over and over. Really hurts
jt27 Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 Having a really low day. In fact a low couple of days. I can't stop dreaming about her and keep thinking to myself how I lost the love of my life. It's so depressing. I just want it to be over. 2
RDawg Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 It's Monday. I am coping. Almost eight months gone now. Life feels strange. I am not healed. Much better now after all these months of no contact, but still very, very sad. I am determined to get better though. I am not going to let this define me forever. Funny how we take our happiness for granted when things are going well. I have got much to be grateful for so I will focus on that. 1
this2shallpass Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 he texted me about 15 times and on saturday i answered. BIGGEST MISTAKE of my life. He ignored me again, and just hurt me alll over again.. he is such a bad person that i didnt know he could be..how could i have been so blind. I think he just texted me for his own ego, to make sure i dont forget him and that i would answer him..he did it JUST to be evil. Nothing else.
ThatOneGuyThat Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 I have an extreme urge to check up on her at this moment, find out where she is and what she'd been doing. Perhaps subconsciously check up on their relationship. But I will not let myself down, looking will only give me further hurt. Hurt I do not deserve. I will continue NC. I will stay strong and firm in my choices. 2
JahnJahn Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 Day 2 after giving her a second chance (she did not cheat but said she was unsure about me and she thought/thinks she has feelings for another guy but loves me) and It doesn't seem like anything is changing. I am contemplating giving her space, not talking to her unless she initiates it and keeping myself busy. Feeling a mixture of depression and IDGAF attitude. I feel i deserve better yet I also feel she is the one for me. I am confused. I just had an exam, was clear of mind, did well I think, but after that the feelings came back rushing. Called her after my exam and asked her now that my exam is done does she still want this she said yes, then shes not sure. I told her I wont bother her about it again. A lot of thoughts going through my head: Should I start going to the gym? Should i call her? Should i just leave it and see how it goes? Keep myself occupied? Does she want this...? I dont know how i feel or what to do Arghh. Hoping Day 3 is better.
DannyCA Posted May 19, 2014 Posted May 19, 2014 Feeling pretty damn sh**** I must admit. I was months into NC with my ex and I can honestly say I felt better and better everyday and was quite content with accepting the way things turned out. But she has this habit where she contacts me every 4 or 5 months for the last year plus post BU. I had a feeling she was going to try and contact me because my birthday was coming up and she tried to add me back on facebook. I denied her on FB and kept moving on. Then she had the nerve to text me the night before my birthday. She sent me some super long text. I immediately deleted it without reading it but I did see in the corner of my eye "lets be friends". Thats all I saw out of the essay of a text she sent me. I never replied to her or read the text but it has definitely set me back. I am really pissed off now because even though she doesn't know she got to me she definitely got under my skin and now I am irritated
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