How are you coping today?

[Kelley]

Again slept really well last night, I wasn't anxious this morning. I found myself thinking of my ex for a bit though, I think it may have been a song on the radio that triggered it! Got to work and all I have heard all day is about my work mate and her troubled relationship. You know what I'm sooooooo happy being single right now. Also reading LS especially the dating forum I'm thinking is it really worth it? Sure I miss the companionship, the affection, a best friend but is it really worth going through so much for it to potentially end after a few years? I'm just not sure, I think I will stay solo for a while!

[RyanO1991]

Again slept really well last night, I wasn't anxious this morning. I found myself thinking of my ex for a bit though, I think it may have been a song on the radio that triggered it! Got to work and all I have heard all day is about my work mate and her troubled relationship. You know what I'm sooooooo happy being single right now. Also reading LS especially the dating forum I'm thinking is it really worth it? Sure I miss the companionship, the affection, a best friend but is it really worth going through so much for it to potentially end after a few years? I'm just not sure, I think I will stay solo for a while!

 

Glad things are starting to come back together for you, Kelley. Being single definitely makes life simpler. After all, you can still get companionship from your friends.

[Kelley]

Thanks Ryan, that's true Yes will be staying single for some time I reckon, I'm just happier that way for now.

 

Glad things are starting to come back together for you, Kelley. Being single definitely makes life simpler. After all, you can still get companionship from your friends.

[Trinity_84]

A few weeks ago I posted about how I came home and cried after I kissed another guy.

 

Well, I finally reached the point when I could get phsyical with someonw without feeling sad about my ex! 8 months after the BU. I felt sexy and wanted again, and it was amazing!

 

I guess I'm there now, I don't want a relationship but I am finally ready to let my guard down and start dating/sleeping with other people.

Edited October 31, 2016 by Trinity_84

[starswewillnavigate]

Do you want to see the new him or the old him?

 

They're probably two very different people.

 

I really want to see the ex... that stupid "one last time" syndrome.

 

The new guy is totally different - kind, caring, considerate. But then that's maybe because we are in the beginning phase, I'm sure ex was like this at the beginning too.

[starswewillnavigate]

What is the ex saying that is making you hold on? As for the dates, enjoy them the guy wouldn't be seeing you if he didn't like you. Don't worry about the future, enjoy the moment. I wish I was in the right place to date, looking forward to that :-)

 

The ex isn't saying much, his messages are friendly but neutral if that makes sense? So I don't know why I'm clinging onto the idea of him.

 

Had another date with the new guy, really enjoying spending time with him.

[Deadmeat]

2 months since I've last seen my ex. A month since I last checked her fb. Things do get better once you do strict NC.

 

I am in the depression stage of grief and I find myself struggling with anxiety. I keep telling myself that that's a good thing because acceptance (final stage) is just around the corner.

 

I still get this jonesing feeling of wanting to creep her social media. Last I did that (month ago) I saw that she had an online dating profile looking to date. That burned me good. Decided not to check ever again. So why do I want to know?

 

Does any body have any suggestions. Wtf is this?

[DarrenB]

2 months since I've last seen my ex. A month since I last checked her fb. Things do get better once you do strict NC.

 

I am in the depression stage of grief and I find myself struggling with anxiety. I keep telling myself that that's a good thing because acceptance (final stage) is just around the corner.

 

I still get this jonesing feeling of wanting to creep her social media. Last I did that (month ago) I saw that she had an online dating profile looking to date. That burned me good. Decided not to check ever again. So why do I want to know?

 

Does any body have any suggestions. Wtf is this?

 

Sometimes you just got to do it. Sometimes you need to see them with every incentive to move on whilst you don't. You've noticed that it's a sudden killer, but it's prevented you from searching her up for a solid month, so it says alot.

 

When you see a completely new side to a person, you don't ever want to go back. Lesson learnt!

[Deadmeat]

Sometimes you just got to do it. Sometimes you need to see them with every incentive to move on whilst you don't. You've noticed that it's a sudden killer, but it's prevented you from searching her up for a solid month, so it says alot.

 

When you see a completely new side to a person, you don't ever want to go back. Lesson learnt!

 

Hey Darren. Thanks for posting. I've been following your thread as well. There were a lot of similarities between our scenarios ( contacted ex despite being pushed away and got bured for it). How are you doing nowa days brother?

 

Are you suggesting that I look her up just so I can see her in a different light agan? SorrY, its late, I'm tired and I may be misinterpreting. Haha.

[DarrenB]

Hey Darren. Thanks for posting. I've been following your thread as well. There were a lot of similarities between our scenarios ( contacted ex despite being pushed away and got bured for it). How are you doing nowa days brother?

 

Are you suggesting that I look her up just so I can see her in a different light agan? SorrY, its late, I'm tired and I may be misinterpreting. Haha.

 

All good mate. I see, that's (somewhat) good to hear! hopefully you've acknowledged the do's and don'ts from what I've already experienced and posted myself

 

I'm doing alright cheers, in all honesty. I won't go into much detail as I hate divulging into private/personal life often, but things do get better overtime (It's been over 2 months since the initial breakup). What I will say is, no matter how occupied you are, no matter how much of a front you try to put on, there will always be a void in your mind and heart for them. It's painful to be rejected and discarded, but they have their reasons in the end, sometimes you really just have to accept that it happens. Better now rather than later right... I think it's her birthday today also, so work's keeping me occupied from sending her another set of fancy bouquet of roses (thank god).

 

Yes, I do suggest it. Some may warn you, some will say not to bother, but I feel in doing so, it's some sort of closure from your own behalf. Like I say, when you see someone who's not involved in your life anymore and they proclaim to be so happy and it seems it, your mind suddenly takes an abrupt detour from all the grief and sorrow you feel for them. There's alot of stages when you're in a breakup, I feel realization is (should) be one of them. Ultimately, it should be the last.

 

If you would like to enlighten me on your situation further or would like to grab a bit of advice or guidance; anything in general really, just feel free to PM me bud

Edited November 1, 2016 by DarrenB

[Deadmeat]

All good mate. I see, that's (somewhat) good to hear! hopefully you've acknowledged the do's and don'ts from what I've already experienced and posted myself

 

I'm doing alright cheers, in all honesty. I won't go into much detail as I hate divulging into private/personal life often, but things do get better overtime (It's been over 2 months since the initial breakup). What I will say is, no matter how occupied you are, no matter how much of a front you try to put on, there will always be a void in your mind and heart for them. It's painful to be rejected and discarded, but they have their reasons in the end, sometimes you really just have to accept that it happens. Better now rather than later right... I think it's her birthday today also, so work's keeping me occupied from sending her another set of fancy bouquet of roses (thank god).

 

Yes, I do suggest it. Some may warn you, some will say not to bother, but I feel in doing so, it's some sort of closure from your own behalf. Like I say, when you see someone who's not involved in your life anymore and they proclaim to be so happy and it seems it, your mind suddenly takes an abrupt detour from all the grief and sorrow you feel for them. There's alot of stages when you're in a breakup, I feel realization is (should) be one of them. Ultimately, it should be the last.

 

If you would like to enlighten me on your situation further or would like to grab a bit of advice or guidance; anything in general really, just feel free to PM me bud

 

Thanks friend. I'll take you up on that offer some time.

 

I thought about what you said, and I think I will hold off for now. I'm not sure if I'll be able to handle that just yet and I don't want to set my progress backwards.

 

I also don't want to make any compulsory actions as that's what got us here in the first place, isn't it? I'm going to think this over some more before I do it (if I do it).

 

I do see what you're saying though and agree that it would be the ultimate test. Right now, I just don't feel ready. I am simply questioning this illogical need...want...to check in on her even though I know I won't find anything useful.

[sorano]

Feel good. So glad I gave up dating, relationships, trying to find a wife or the one, etc etc. I don't have to deal with women or relationships anymore. It's a relief. I. Happy being alone and doing me.

[DarrenB]

Thanks friend. I'll take you up on that offer some time.

 

Yes ofcourse, only do so when you're entirely ready. You don't want to make progression, only to be setback again.

 

Do whatever possible. What's helped me from my dire stress and sadness over time, was to analyse myself, analyse her, the relationship and each action that had occurred. Some people would say simply just to forgive and forget, however I like taking a different approach. I feel to acknowledge the route of one's flaws, instigates a new development for yourself. You'll be able to avoid these mishaps in time from now.

 

Sometimes, it is really hard and difficult to overcome. I'm only young, and obviously I don't know your entire background but, don't waste time on something obsolete. I've wasted valuable teenage years 'stuck in a rut' and alone, afraid to communicate with almost anyone due to feeling like a constant burden. Relationships, friendships, acquaintances, relatives they come and go. What's left till the bitter end is yourself. Treat yourself to a better life rather than attempting to make someone elses better. Someone of whom at this point in time wouldn't give you the time of day. We live to dream and accomplish, not to be pessimists.

 

Always look on the brighter of side of life (cliche, I know). Even if it seems incredibly bleak and it's non-existent, there is always a reason to believe and succeed.

[NIGHT1985]

Going to see a highly reviewed psychologist today. I hope this will be the beginning of the end of my unhealthy obsessions towards my ex and our relationship. I so badly want to truly be free, and live life for myself again

[VeveCakes]

My coping skills suck. I have been broken up just over two months and I think the longest NC I have been is 7 days. My ex has been messaging me for 2 days straight...sending me cute snap chats and of course, I am engaging. I just love and miss him so much! At least the hope of us getting back together has left me...so I guess I am not totally helpless. I just can't help but talk to him...I really really miss him.

[sooshi]

Hugs to you, Veve.

 

I know that you know what the right thing to do is. If you won't do it for you, do it for your horsies. They want you to be happy (and you want you to be happy, too!).

[VeveCakes]

Hugs to you, Veve.

 

I know that you know what the right thing to do is. If you won't do it for you, do it for your horsies. They want you to be happy (and you want you to be happy, too!).

 

So true....my horses are probably tired of being my shoulder to cry on (but I do love their big fuzzy shoulders to cry on ). Thanks

[Kelley]

NC is not for the feint hearted! I know it hurts and the missing just kills you sometimes, but if you stick with it, it does get easier!

 

 

My coping skills suck. I have been broken up just over two months and I think the longest NC I have been is 7 days. My ex has been messaging me for 2 days straight...sending me cute snap chats and of course, I am engaging. I just love and miss him so much! At least the hope of us getting back together has left me...so I guess I am not totally helpless. I just can't help but talk to him...I really really miss him.

[Kelley]

Had a fantastic day, no anxiety, feeling great - that is all

[sorano]

Going to see a highly reviewed psychologist today. I hope this will be the beginning of the end of my unhealthy obsessions towards my ex and our relationship. I so badly want to truly be free, and live life for myself again

 

amen to that

[NIGHT1985]

Well the session went awful. She seemed uninterested and was as if I was talking to a brick wall. I'll see if I can try another therapist next time

[sorano]

sorry to hear bro. Keep trying. If you feel therapy will work keep tryng to find someone that is right for you.

 

I mentioned this so many times on the forum and I know one person bought a book that I recommend. It may or may not help you. But yes, the gym is my therapist. let me explain.

 

when I tell people that the gym is my therapy, it is. If I didn't train, I would flip out and go nuts. I would snap and go ape ****. I am the sweetest guy in the world. I will give you the world. But I need the gym to release those endorphines, hormones, and release the other hormones that ANTI DEPRESSANTS RELEASE.

 

Pick up the book spark. In europe and some doctors here, instead of prescribing medicine or sending them to a therapist, they tell there patients to workout and do a lot of cardio. aerobics. Lots and lots of aerobics. Aerobics releases all those good chemicals that drugs do. it even rewires the brain, fights depression, sharpens your mind, fights memory loss and improves conductivity of the chemicals in the brain. which is what medicine does. They actually treat kids with adhd, depression and also found that they improved in school work.

 

Think about this. when was the last time you saw a lethargic, unhappy aerobics instructor. I never have. Never. You will be surprised what aerobics combined with weight training can do. Its medically proven by doctors and documented. No false hope. Give it a shot. It helps me big time.

[sorano]

Lately people have been asking me how do I have the energy to work 9 hrs a day in a stressful and I mean stressful job here in new york, and workout. skin is brighter, muscles are coming back fast and rapid, and focused energy. so I tell them what supplements I take. IMO, these supplements, along with aerobics and weight training, can combat and help with these terrible break ups and really heal the body. overall sense of well being. who doesnt want to feel great? And your performance in the bed room will increase as well. win win.

 

vitamins, cortisol blocker bc stress and break ups increase cortisol which can destroy your body and mood. It literally eats you inside out. Horrible hormone. Proper diet and supplements. I know a lot of you have turned to the gym to cope with a heart break. Heart break is just the worse. But anyway here is my list.

 

blackstone labs hype

blackstone labs resurgance

toco 8 (One of the best supplements ever)

sustain alpha ( you guys are going to love this and so will your dates hehe)

micronized creatine monohydrate 5 grams a day every single day with dextrose powder.

Gnc mega men

JYM post workout formula

alpha amino

blackstone labs dust

JYM protein shake for post workout

blackstone labs shake " 3 whey" for breakfast

 

 

supplements that I cycle on and off are...

beast super test powder

blackstone labs growth

blackstone labs epicat

blackstone labs pct

1000mgs tribulus

500mgs maca

vitamin D injections

vitamin b12 injections

HCG injections ( yes made from pregnant womens piss lol ) with b12

If you want to get a little wild, throw some testosterone cypionate at medicinal doses. 200mgs a week. Very beneficial.

 

Then to come off the testosterone, take CLOMID and nolvadex, which are serms to bring back natural test and testicle size.

 

enjoy!!!

[Logo]

I feel like I'm pretty much over the relationship.

 

I was angry today for some reason. I get easily irritated lately, but I keep it inside. Women used to check me out all the time. Now, I don't see them doing the same. Is it my sleep deprivation? Is it my feelings of vulnerability after the breakup?

 

I don't know why my self confidence has been hurt lately. I felt more confident after the break, but I was preoccupied with my grief.

 

Tomorrow will be better. I know.

[Raina314]

Fom an outside perspective I'm doing great. I'm 23, a homeowner, have a good paying job, just got a freelancing gig as a translator (which has always been my dream), went to Russia twice this year (once as a tourist and once for my friend's wedding, both also long-term dreams that came true), took up sailing, tennis, and have been going to soirees and balls at the embassies downtown. Every time I go out and meet new people I make new friends and usually get asked out by guys. But I don't like any of them. I feel like my capacity for loving has been permanently damaged.

 

My ex messaged me for the first time in September and opened up to me about some issues he's been having with a mutual friend and asked for my help. He never opens up to others about personal issues and I was shocked. But it also made me realize I still love him.

 

I've been seeing a counselor and it kinda helped, but I've finally realized that even the best therapist can't make you fall out of love. I don't know what it'll take. I've worked on myself as much as a person can. I believe in myself. I know I can take care of myself. I know that I'm responsible, intelligent, strong, kind, mature, thoughtful, attractive, interesting and fun and I don't *need* anyone else. But some days I wake up and miss feeling him next to me and having someone around I actually want to hug and kiss and be affectionate with. When I try to stop thinking loving thoughts about him, I feel bitter and thorny towards everything. I feel that way towards new guys regardless, and feel certain I won't fall for anyone again. I feel like my feelings for my ex are the only thing that keep my capacity for romantic love alive in any form.