How are you coping today?

[MR27]

Aweful, tomorrow was supposed to be our anniversary and we broke up 2 weeks ago, tomorrow I will feel a lot worse I know, today I miss her more then anything in the world and I just wish I could go back in time and fix all of this and I'm hurt knowing that isn't possible, I haven't eaten properly since we broke up, I just can't bring myself to, one step at a time

[Jellybean24]

Coping really bad lately. It's going on 5 months and I thought I would have made more progress by now. I'm completely stuck on my ex. I don't want to close that chapter of my life. I miss him so much. I've never wanted to hug someone so much. I feel like he would make all the pain just go away if he gave in but he won't. I know the red flags. He keeps in contact with me sometimes, it's very infrequent but when he does I feel good and then it's the days afterwards I can't cope at all. I feel like I will never love a guy the same again. It's been almost five months and the though of being with anyone else but him just doesn't feel right. I'm giving myself until January to get myself together and at least try meet someone new. I literally take one day at a time I can't think of the future anymore. This has been the worst year of my life, I dread Christmas and all future events. There's this dull sense of sadness just hanging over me. I can't stop contact with him because it's too hard and considering how little we talk now there's no point when I will run in to him here and there we have the same friends. I have to control not to text him TG but when he contacts me which is v rare I do reply, it's never personal.

He sent me pictures the other night of him dressed up for Halloween with his friends, I didn't ask for the pic, the day before that he sent me a selfie at work. Why send me pictures. I just want to stop feeling

[Hewie]

Coping was never easy. I do not have any friends that I could truly talk to and if I ever speak, all i get was to be shot at. I just dont feel any sense of belonging at all. Sometimes I think that if i ever leave this group of mutual friends, it would be a better choice, then things would be the same for them. Things would not be so difficult for them. Things would have been much happier for them.

 

Its been 3 months now since she broke up with me. Not a single word from her, nothing at all. All I knew was she is creating drama out of nowhere and trying to get attention with her new boyfriend (which she was already together with him for the first 2 months).

 

Its not easy to cope where every week you get heartache out of nowhere, your mood is down from everything and you try to live by it day by day. Because life still goes on.

 

Memories kept replaying back and whenever I speak of it, like i said, all i get is to be shot down by anyone of them. I walked away because I know that its her decision that she does not want me anymore, its her decision to decide my expiry date.

 

I am trying my very best not to think about anything but heart says otherwise. It is very to cope but I still have to do it, thats what I told myself

[Wally Bee]

So today was suppose to be our first official anniversary even though were together a lot longer. I knew this week was going to be tough, but I was doing fine until i got on my dummy facebook to look something up. I went to my site hoping I wouldn't see anything and I was wrong, I saw her on my page and then the temptation to see if she was still on my flist was too great. She was still there and a glimpse of her smiling face. It shot right through my body, I was doing so well and then I made a stupid mistake and stuck myself with that knife. I am an idiot.

[Snix0805]

Terrible. I keep having severe panic attacks, dreaming about him and just miss him so so much. I wish that he was here, back again, trying to fix things with me but no I am now alone. I keep dreaming about him and waking up to the reality that he's not there anymore is just killing me. The pain and loneliness is so overhwelming.

[foam12]

For reference I was the one who got dumped. It's been 10 days for me and each day is different. Some I wake up and feel at peace with her decision, some days I'm really confused, some days I am pissed at me or her, yesterday was did she even love me, and today I wake up wondering if it was another guy even though I don't think so and that is consistent with my random thoughts of where it all went wrong each day. Regardless, I have gone to the gym each morning and it has helped me get out of bed and then actually make me feel a little better and back at peace with her decision. What a wonderful f'n world...

[MR27]

Today I feel like I can see where I've gone wrong in life and the relationship and what's pushed her away from me but at the same time I really miss her, I had to go to the bank that was round the corner from her house and the urge to just go and knock was really high but the voice in my head told me that I need to give her space and leave her alone or I'll just push her away forever, even though I may have already

[freebird31]

I somewhat feel like I'm going through a breakup again. It's been 5 weeks since we have spoken. And I don't plan to speak with him. So that I can move on and get over him. Sometimes I get the urge to reach out but I won't do it. I don't want to waste any more if my time by prolonging the healing process. Just trying to leg go.

[Radarsat]

I feel destined to be alone forever today. Almost feel the guarantee that I will never find anyone again. I'm 37, bald, fat, short, hairy, not handy, a "dork" as the ladies call me, and extremely shy. I'm ****ed.

[freebird31]

i must have really liked this guy. because i miss him so much. i dont even know what to do. i cant believe this. i always get too involved, too attached to people. this is a recurring pattern now. i no longer can even feel sorry for myself, because i am starting to wonder if i have a part in why i feel this way. I miss this last guy I was dating so much. i remember when i started dating him, in the beginning, i remember feeling like i was the luckiest girl in the world. EVERYTHING finally seemed to make sense. Why it never worked out with my ex. because i met this amazing person. Who understood me better than anyone I know. i grew attached to him. and he is with another woman now, and its been 5 weeks since we have last talked. and i feel so sick inside because i cannot stop thinking about him. why couldnt i be ready before. why did it take me so long to realize. Why did it take me seeing him happy with someone else. i feel phsycally sick when i think of the two of them, and how foolish i was to have not tried harder to make it work. There were so many times i remember wanting to tell him that i wanted to take it to the next step. I was so afraid of wasting his time, and not being ready, and i just kept waiting and waiting until i felt sure. And then he met that girl, and post the pictures of the two of them. and i wanted so badly to tell him, but i was so afraid. i still was so scared, so unsure, still so in love with my ex. and i didnt want to risk ruining hurting him. I let more time pass. it took me SO LONG, too damn long, and now im finally over my ex-boyfriend. i finally feel ready. and Now i am too late. im too late. and every day i just feel so sad and sick. because i truly liked this guy. and WHY couldnt i realize jsut how much i did until it was too late. why. Now i feel like i just need time to get over this guy now. after i just spent so much time and energy trying to get over my first love, now i have to get over this guy. This situation is a little different. but still, it doesnt really make it any easier. i will admit, i was not as heart broken as i was when my first love broke my heart. maybe because he betrayed me a few weeks later by dating another girl. idk. But i still feel this dull ache, and i CANNOT take this feeling away of missing him every day. i miss our conversations, our deep conversations, our intimate talks about life, about our pasts, about everything. i miss him so much.

 

and now i just have to accept that he is happy with someone else. why did things end this way. it was just total wrong timing. i was so messed up and not healed from my ex. i was in no place to get romantically involved with someone new, AT ALL. and then it just happened, i met this guy. and he came out of nowhere. i didnt plan it at all. my friend was the one who made that account for me. and then me and this guy just clicked! we just understood eachother. and now i just keep thinking of us, of what went wrong, of why it couldnt have just worked out. of how i was so lost emotionally, i was so broken, and in a dark place. i dont know.

 

its been 5 weeks since we have spoken. and i fight the urge to reach out and see how he is doing. im foolish i know. im foolish. but this feeling, it feels like a withdraw. like i NEED this, it feels like i need to speak with him. i cant believe i am going through this again. after everything i had to go through with getting over my ex, how did i let this happen. i should have never agreed to do that stupid online app. i NEVER expected to actually meet someone i liked, or had an actual connection with.

 

I dont know. i just miss him. maybe i should try to date other people. even though all i do is compare them to him. at least i know that i am over my first love at least. this is so messy now.

[xera]

Its my second day of nc. Im optimistic!

 

I accomplished one day of no contact!

 

Ive danced in the mirror, listened to david guetta and other edm/dance music.

 

Then i went to the gym to work out! Feels so good to ruffle my feathers! I really feel happy and pretty!

 

I put on my make up, and thought that im really beautiful and she's going to regret leaving me. Hahaha!

 

Im sure she will regret it. At least I know that I made things right for me.

 

I still remember her.. But I try to also remember that she's already happy and she's left me.. So she doesnt need me.. Well, I think ill be okay.

[xera]

I feel destined to be alone forever today. Almost feel the guarantee that I will never find anyone again. I'm 37, bald, fat, short, hairy, not handy, a "dork" as the ladies call me, and extremely shy. I'm ****ed.

 

Then, do something about it. Go to the gym and transform yourself into a hottie. Nothing's impossible.

[xera]

Terrible. I keep having severe panic attacks, dreaming about him and just miss him so so much. I wish that he was here, back again, trying to fix things with me but no I am now alone. I keep dreaming about him and waking up to the reality that he's not there anymore is just killing me. The pain and loneliness is so overhwelming.

 

Well be here for you... Post your story or write them. Were willing to listen to you. you probably need an anti anxiety drug.. Ask a doctor or something...

[StrangerThanFiction]

It's been 6 months since the BU and 6 months of NC. I was doing pretty good up until a couple weeks ago. I find myself thinking about him and missing him a lot lately, even though for the months before this I didn't really miss him at all unless I was hungover, and I chalk that mostly up to drinker's remorse instead of any actual feelings. But now I just don't know. I find myself wondering what's been happening in his life over the last 6 months. I wonder how him and the woman he left me for a doing together. I wonder if his life is better now that I'm not a part of it. I just wonder and not only is it pointless, it's painful. Thinking about him just brings home how lonely I've been lately and I don't know how to remedy that.

[xera]

I broke down and cried to Jesus and Mama mary today. Begging she's come back. I thought I was doing okay, but I just cannot stop thinking of her.

 

Ill be sending her my drawings and my last love letter to her via snail mail.

 

 

I really love her. More than anyone.. I am willing to fight for her until the end and love her until the end.

 

I don't know why I had to take her for granted. I am so sorry for myself.

[LLQ1986]

I broke down and cried to Jesus and Mama mary today. Begging she's come back. I thought I was doing okay, but I just cannot stop thinking of her.

 

Ill be sending her my drawings and my last love letter to her via snail mail.

 

 

I really love her. More than anyone.. I am willing to fight for her until the end and love her until the end.

 

I don't know why I had to take her for granted. I am so sorry for myself.

 

Stay strong! You can send those to her but they are gonna be your last. You need to go NC immediately right after and work on yourself. It's tough I know but trust me it's all gonna be alright one day.

[Cora]

I would say I'm coping ok today. You know ever since he left me I've always been afraid to change even a single thing in my life. I wanted everything to stay exactly the same as I remembered it when he was in my life. I guess I was afraid if things changed I'd somehow forget him or maybe I still held out hope that he'd come back to me if everything was the same before he left. Just silly things like that.

 

Well, I'm finally starting to move forward in my life instead of just standing still. Things are changing and a lot has happened since he's left. I got my hair cut for the first time in a long time, I got a new job, I've had major surgery, I've turned a year older, I'm going places, doing things and facing things I haven't since I was a child. It's all rather refreshing really.

 

Of course I still have days where he will cross my mind. And I may even still get a little saddened about what was, what's no more and what could of been. Some days a tear or two might roll down my cheek, but for the most part I'm ok. I realize he wasn't the right person for me. No matter how badly I wanted him to be. Sometimes the heart wants what it can't have. It does take time, but I do believe everything will eventually be ok again....

[LLQ1986]

I miss him so much today. I wanted to talk to him badly and I know I can't

[jrode23]

I rarely check Instagram, but tonight I happened to open the app. I saw a post from someone whom I know through my ex (they must have been out together). It was a picture of a restaurant receipt, signed by my ex (and with my ex's phone number) and I just laughed. She's giving out her number to random waiters.

 

Needless to say, just making me feel less and less upset about the breakup.

[freebird31]

I feel okay. I can keep going. At the end of the day, I know I have ME and that is more important than ANYTHING else. I got through one of the hardest things I have ever had to go through, that was when my first love broke my heart, SHATTERED it actually into a million pieces. Its funny, when we were together I truly truly thought the feelings were mutual. I didnt realize how they were not. And i remember after we broke up, and we saw each other for the last time. And i remember I asked him "well, what if i meet someone else?" He didnt even blink. He just calmy told me "that is what is supposed to happen." And i'll never forget it. At the time I was so confused. And for the few years after even I was confused. But the only thing that makes sense to me now is accepting that my ex didnt share the same feelings as i did for him. And at the time, knowing this would have KILLED me inside. It killed me to even think that was a possibility. But now, after 2 and half years, i can finally just accept that. And it is not as big a deal as it once was. Because I am so different from that girl. Im so different and it took me a long time to get here, and i needed every single second of that time to really heal, and i can bet that with the more time that passes, this will just be COMPLETELY irrelevant to my life. Because, honestly it is starting to just become irrlevant. I no longer think of my ex as i onced used to. To me, he is just a stranger to me. That does not mean I will forget the memories or that I will no longer be fond of him or the memories. I will treasure them forever. It was a sweet and innocent kind of love that i got to experience and boy did it teach me a lot.

 

But i can live without him. I can move on now finally.

 

I wouldnt have met the last guy i met if it wasnt for the break up. And i wouldnt have ever realized what it felt like to be valued by someone else. It felt so good. My ex had been doing it wrong the ENTIRE time, and i had NO idea. It feels so good to know that someone can truly care about me, and value me, and just love all of me, and be captivated by who I am and moved by me, and is interested to know more and more. I LOVED every second of it. And although it didnt work out with him, its okay. Because he gave me a sweet sweet gift that i will FOREVER be grateful for. He showed me what it felt like to be adored and appreciated. And I will never settle for anything less than that ever! Not after being exposed to how wonderful it feels.

 

It has been a long and rough road. But I have to remember that I am only 23 years old, I have my whole life ahead of me. I still am working on pursuing my career, and becoming the woman I envision. I still have plenty of time to love again and meet someone who can hopefully sweep me off my feet.

 

i will be okay. Even when it feels like its so hard and i miss the last guy I was talking to. I cant let it bring me down. because i was able to get over my ex. So i can get through this too.

[kxpxsc3]

It's been 24 hours since I implemented strict NC. After 5 months of low contact and keeping him on social media (and looking too) he is has been completely eliminated from my life. I felt too stuck in one place and nothing was changing. It feels a little weird to have closed that door, but a part of me is also relieved. I just couldn't torture myself any longer.

 

I just hope and pray that things look up from here. But I am trying to enjoy the little things such as having a coffee in the morning, knowing that nothing will disturb my peace.

[Dot1]

Today I am struggling to cope. Since we broke up I got to rock bottom and pulled myself up. Lost 24 pounds, took up running, got a promotion, made so many new friends, I've started anew.

 

But the past few days have been rough. I broke down in work on Friday, I left the office and just cried (manly I know), on Saturday I looked at her Facebook, nothing on there to make me upset as such (I.e no one else) but I just missed her.

 

I think I've got to a point where I want to move forward with my life as shown above because everything is great, but my best friend and the person who saved me is no longer there.

 

I suppose I'm writing here instead of,giving into temptation of contacting her, but what if she is waiting for me to contact and thinks I've moved on and that's why she isn't contacting??? Writing that down shows me how silly that thought is, if she loved me she would find a way to contact me.

 

I wish I could make it right. However I did ask her to marry me in my desperation of wanting her back previously and I suppose can't get much more committed than that.

 

Bit of a ramble but overall not coping today

[Cora]

This morning has been rough. I've been so busy and preoccupied for the majority of this week to even think about him, but today I stupidly looked at his Facebook page for the first time in awhile. Brought the pain that I thought was gone right back to the surface again. Apparently he is still with the woman he left me for. They are doing so much together and look so happy. They have been together almost 7 months now. Hard to believe since it seems like only yesterday he was a part of my life. So I guess things are pretty serious between the two of them. Looks like they'll be spending the holidays together. He's moved on while time has stood still for me. I'm much better now than I was several months ago and I'd be completely fine if it were not for all the little reminders of him.

 

I'll see a car on the road that looks just like his, I'll hear his name, I'll pass by the restaurant we had dinner at on NYE, I'll hear his favorite song on the radio, or I'll see a movie on tv that we watched together or that I know he loves, I'll see his favorite football team playing, or I'll be in his part of town on the way to somewhere. Just so many damn reminders!!! It doesn't help that his now girlfriend lives in my neighborhood so I could potentially see him around. I hope I never do because I know that will hurt more than I could imagine. I think it's getting harder for me the closer the holidays get. We shared our first kiss on NYE. Sigh...but he will be kissing her now.

 

I will be ok. I just have to stay away from social media in the future. It's the devil! Especially when you're trying to get over someone. So when you have the urge to take a peek, don't do it!!! It's not even worth it and will only make you feel like ****. I was fine yesterday. Today...not so much. All because I could not resist the urge to take a peek.

[Echoes_and_Silence]

It's been two months, but the pain is still fresh.

 

I wish there were some way we could have no contact. But we work together, and I see her every day. It wasn't some fling, either: I really loved this woman. I'm still depressed on the weekends, but not as bad. My heart skips a beat when I see a car like hers. My heart breaks when I say "hi" to her and she walks past me without saying anything to me. I know she hadn't been happy for a long time, but I didn't think I had hurt her that bad. She went from holding my hand to not giving me the time of day. I thought we could be adults about this, but I feel like neither of us are.

 

I miss her to death and I took her for granted. If I hadn't, if I had calmed down and praised her instead of being jealous of her, things could have kept going. It is awful to know that the only reason things are the way they are now is because of the way I acted, and no longer having the opportunity to fix it.

 

I still break down when I hear songs from the CD she made me. Even then she knew, having interspersed the happy songs with songs about breakup.

 

I know what's healthy: not to think about her, to recognize what I did wrong and to take the lessons from it, to move on. I can't help but keep looking back and regretting my behavior, and feeling hurt/angry/sad about how she's cold-shouldered me since. I think I enjoy being sad, because I simply am not moving on. I will never meet anyone as sweet as her or as compatible with me. Maybe in other ways, more important ways, but not in so many.

 

I have wasted so much time reading self-help articles online. I need out.

[freebird31]

My friends don't understand what I am going through. I feel like an awful person and everyone will judge me. I am still hung up on the last guy I was talking to. It's been 6 weeks NC. And I feel like I'm going through a legit break up. I feel so down and depressed and every second that goes by I miss him so much. I have to FIGHT myself to not reach out, to him. He has a girlfriend. But you don't understand how hard this is to fight. I need to stop and gain some self control before I do something I regret. I never expected to be in this position nor consider acting upon it. But my feelings for him are REAL. I miss him every day. I so badly want to reach out and tell him how much I miss him. This is so hard. Trying to detach. this is borderline almost cheating in a way. He already told me he misses me too once. And now I can never forget those words. I'm lingering on to this false hope that they will break up. I got attached again. This is so bad. Maybe he's a bad guy because why would he say he misses me while he has a GF. My mind is so fogged right now by my feelings for him. I need to get a grip but the withdrawals are so real right now.