Wondering2426 Posted December 2, 2016 Posted December 2, 2016 I posted about a month back about my recent break uphere: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/600429-ex-left-another-girl-but-has-indecisiveness-issues Since the break up, I have been NC. So for 44 days. No, I did not actually goall out and block him off of Facebook, but I did “unfollow” him and have notlooked at his profile since the break up. NC has done wonders for my healing. Ihave actually been out on a couple dates, but of course nothing serious. It hasbeen nice to meet some new people at least. As well, being with friends hashelped me out tremendously throughout this period! I have also recently becomemotivated enough to start studying for my course. When I am alone and feeling abit down, I come on here and most of the time it always manages to get my moodback up. I have not heard a peep from him in the past month and a half, and Iam sure he is enjoying his time with his new girlfriend. As for me, I have adate tomorrow so we will see where that goes I have also told my mutual friends to not bring up any more information abouthim so I can move on. They were able to do this, fairly easily because none ofthem see him anymore, and it has been great! However, last night my friendmentioned to me that she did see him this week. He brought the subject upsaying he did want to be friends with me, but was afraid and unsure how to start a conversation with meconsidering how everything transpired. She, of course, suggested to just say hi(but lets be honest, no way would I respond to that breadcrumb). What do youthink his motivation really is to do this? I am assuming to ease dumpers guilt. Before you ask, no I will definitely NOT be breaking NC to reach out to him tobe friends just because I heard this. NC has done wonders for me and I am notabout to take a step back in the healing process. Also, I do not think I amready to be friends with him at this present time. If he were to text me atthis point, I don’t think I would completely ignore him per say, but I wouldsay something along the lines that I am not ready to be his friend but possiblysometime in the future I will be. Looking back at the relationship, I do seethat we were more friends than lovers. However, I do not know if you becomemore friends as time goes on in a LTR.. could anyone shed some light on this? Iwould like to know for my next relationship. Another downfall was we alsoalmost had too much in common, if that is possible. We shared the same interestsand hobbies, and even the way we would cope through upsetting situations ispretty much the exact same. That being said – I think that is one reason why Iwouldn’t possibly rule out the idea of friendship but in a long time from now. Also some other questions to stir up some discussion: If you are friends with your ex, how long of a time period has passed since forwere able to be friends? Once you started being friends, did it take a while to become comfortable? What are you reasonings for not becoming friends with an ex? Do you believe that if you can be friends with an ex, that feelings were nevertruly there? As usual, thanks for the advice and listening to my ranting!
Recommended Posts