Author What-2-Do Posted April 10, 2017 Author Share Posted April 10, 2017 You are well aware that this marriage is dead yet you refuse to leave. What can anyone do to help since you insist on allowing your wife to take advantage of you like this? Crappy spouses do not deserve to have houses bought for them to live in. Marriage is supposed to be about give and take. I'm sure your wife didn't even acknowledge your anniversary with loving actions such as, I don't know, having sex with you like a real spouse does. People will lose patience with someone who complains but does nothing to change his situation. Tomorrow is my Birthday and next Monday is our anniversary. We've more or less been fighting all day except for when I left to go to the gym. She offered sex tonight and I declined so now she is ultra pissed at me. Another night with her sleeping in the other bedroom. I need to figure out her finances so she doesn't lose her house. I want my son to have the security of a home esp. since we've moved several times in the past few years. I need to figure out my way out and I know this marriage can't be fixed. I posted on FB yesterday about how we haven't gone on a date in 2.5 years and people were blown away by it. She tried replying that it's because she's been sick and even her friends replied that she hasn't been sick for 2.5 years. She's given up on life and is dragging me down with her. This sucks. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 (edited) Complaining about your wife on Facebook like that is an incredibly passive aggressive thing to do. If you were my husband and you did that to me, you would be out on the streets, looking for somewhere to sleep that night... Quit complaining and make a decision. Edited April 10, 2017 by BaileyB 3 Link to post Share on other sites
BettyDraper Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 Tomorrow is my Birthday and next Monday is our anniversary. We've more or less been fighting all day except for when I left to go to the gym. She offered sex tonight and I declined so now she is ultra pissed at me. Another night with her sleeping in the other bedroom. I need to figure out her finances so she doesn't lose her house. I want my son to have the security of a home esp. since we've moved several times in the past few years. I need to figure out my way out and I know this marriage can't be fixed. I posted on FB yesterday about how we haven't gone on a date in 2.5 years and people were blown away by it. She tried replying that it's because she's been sick and even her friends replied that she hasn't been sick for 2.5 years. She's given up on life and is dragging me down with her. This sucks. Posting on Facebook about your marital problems is gauche and solves nothing. You're a grown man and not a child in middle school. I'm getting the impression that you're a weak person. You allow your wife to walk all over you while constantly whining. Part of the reason she doesn't respect you or your marriage is she sees that your behave like a doormat. We women do not find doormats sexy. You mentioned struggling financially in the past. It seems like you enjoy that lifestyle or else you wouldn't buy your wife a home prior to divorcing her. Of course, you're probably not going to leave your wife. You're just going to keep whinging on LS until one of you dies. Sorry W2D. I find it hard to have much compassion for you given your poor decisions and victim mentality. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 She offered sex tonight and I declined so now she is ultra pissed at me. How does this help you ??? Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted April 11, 2017 Share Posted April 11, 2017 Many moons ago you said you were filing for divorce. You're still in the exact same spot as you were before. Nothing has changed. Sad to say but I think you (both) are addicted the drama in your marriage. Or you're just too scared to be alone and on your own. It's easy to stay with what you know and the comforts of your home etc, rather than to push forward and start over again. You did a big mistake by posting about it on your fb page. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author What-2-Do Posted April 12, 2017 Author Share Posted April 12, 2017 UPDATE: Thank you for the tough love it is what I needed. I'm moving out on Saturday morning. You are all right. This relationship is doomed and it is toxic. Time to move on. I'm glad she bought the house because it will give her and my son some stability. I will be stuck helping pay for it but I'm OK with that so long as our son is taken care of. I have a temporary place to live and will be looking for a townhouse in the meanwhile. Hoping I can sign a lease to move in on May 1st. I hate the drama and I'm def. afraid to leave. There are a ton of comforts here like being with my son all the time and that's going to change. I'm afraid how this will impact him as he's had a lot of recent stresses. He doesn't know what's going on between my wife and I because we never argue in front of him or around him. We don't get along but at least we are civil. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BettyDraper Posted April 13, 2017 Share Posted April 13, 2017 UPDATE: Thank you for the tough love it is what I needed. I'm moving out on Saturday morning. You are all right. This relationship is doomed and it is toxic. Time to move on. I'm glad she bought the house because it will give her and my son some stability. I will be stuck helping pay for it but I'm OK with that so long as our son is taken care of. I have a temporary place to live and will be looking for a townhouse in the meanwhile. Hoping I can sign a lease to move in on May 1st. I hate the drama and I'm def. afraid to leave. There are a ton of comforts here like being with my son all the time and that's going to change. I'm afraid how this will impact him as he's had a lot of recent stresses. He doesn't know what's going on between my wife and I because we never argue in front of him or around him. We don't get along but at least we are civil. I thought that you bought the house...? I'm confused. Here's hoping that you and your wife stay apart this time. Your son will be hurt but he will get past his parents' divorce eventually. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted April 13, 2017 Share Posted April 13, 2017 I'm sorry, but it is for the best. Someday, you will look back and see things with more clarity. You will have another relationship with a woman who treats you well, and your son will be well adjusted... and you will know that you made the right decision. Link to post Share on other sites
BluesPower Posted April 13, 2017 Share Posted April 13, 2017 I'm sorry, but it is for the best. Someday, you will look back and see things with more clarity. You will have another relationship with a woman who treats you well, and your son will be well adjusted... and you will know that you made the right decision. Even more than that..OP and Bailey. You will find that a huge weight will be lifted off of your shoulders. It may take a few days, but one day your step will be lighter and you will feel like the world is you oyster, and it is. Please, please do you marry the first woman that you like and is compatible with your sex drive. Please don't. At your age, they will fall in love in a heartbeat and want to get married at the drop of a hat. Enjoy your new life and live a little... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BettyDraper Posted April 14, 2017 Share Posted April 14, 2017 Even more than that..OP and Bailey. You will find that a huge weight will be lifted off of your shoulders. It may take a few days, but one day your step will be lighter and you will feel like the world is you oyster, and it is. Please, please do you marry the first woman that you like and is compatible with your sex drive. Please don't. At your age, they will fall in love in a heartbeat and want to get married at the drop of a hat. Enjoy your new life and live a little... This. W2D, spend at least one year alone and then another year playing the field before you get into an exclusive relationship. Be VERY careful about marrying again. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author What-2-Do Posted April 21, 2017 Author Share Posted April 21, 2017 My business took a nasty hit so that put a huge damper on things. I moved into my dads house with him and will be stuck there for prob. another month. Our 13 year anniversary was on Monday and needless to say nothing was said about it. Whenever she reaches out to me it just pisses me off. I know I'm making the right decision as there is no way this relationship will ever improve. Link to post Share on other sites
Author What-2-Do Posted April 21, 2017 Author Share Posted April 21, 2017 This. W2D, spend at least one year alone and then another year playing the field before you get into an exclusive relationship. Be VERY careful about marrying again. I won't wait a year to start dating again. I will start up shortly but just be up front with anyone I date that I'm not looking for anything serious. I won't be getting married ever again. Marriage is really just a trap. Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 Did you file for divorce yet? Link to post Share on other sites
Author What-2-Do Posted April 21, 2017 Author Share Posted April 21, 2017 Did you file for divorce yet? No, not yet but I will be doing it this week. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mz. Pixie Posted April 24, 2017 Share Posted April 24, 2017 Dang I leave for a bit and come back to this. I'm sorry it's taken this route but I am glad you're finally gaining some self respect. She's a spoiled brat. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BettyDraper Posted April 24, 2017 Share Posted April 24, 2017 I won't wait a year to start dating again. I will start up shortly but just be up front with anyone I date that I'm not looking for anything serious. I won't be getting married ever again. Marriage is really just a trap. Sometimes recently divorced start dating immediately to gain confidence. A friend of mine is doing that. I support her because the dating makes her happy. Marriage is only a trap if you marry the wrong person. Link to post Share on other sites
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