should I prevent my girlfriend from cheating?

[SammySammy]

Prevent someone from cheating. The very idea amuses me so.

 

Especially when you've cheated on them.

 

You can't control who a person decides to be with.

[Satu]

snip

I don't know what to do. Should I stop her from seeing this other guy or whoever the hell it is.. or not? If I don't do or say anything *she's gonna think that it's okay. But if I try to stop her... she's gonna be like well you did that to me in the past... what the fk do I do??!?!?!?!

 

As it's occurring in the context of what you describe as an "open relationship," it is ok.

 

As regards stopping her seeing the other guy, you don't have the right or means of doing so.

 

Sorry to be so blunt.

 

 

Take care.

Edited November 6, 2016 by Satu

[smackie9]

Once you open up that can of worms, you won't be able to close it. You cheated on her and then suggest an open relationship, so a committed monogamous relationship is going to be out of the question. She isn't going to trust you, and I don't think you can trust yourself. I feel you are trying to pull this off because you are jealous at her success finding lovers, enjoying their pleasure and possibly having better sex. It's just eating at you. Funny what happens when the shoe is on the other foot.

[Space Ritual]

Pinkerton,

 

I have to say I don't have much sympathy for you or you situation. Once you ring eh cheating bell in the first place, it can't be unrung.

 

That being said, you are operating under the premise that you can control your girlfriend's actions. As much as we would like to believe that we have control on any and all situations, the fact of the matter is that the only person you can control is yourself.

 

And frankly, had you been able to control yourself initially, chances are you would not find yourself in such a precarious position.

 

So basically you have two options, break up with her or don't.

 

yes it really is just that simple.

[elaine567]

The problem you have here is that 1. you have a woman who you betrayed by cheatng on her, and 6 months is not long enough for her to get over that actually, and 2. you decided to then open up your relationship which I guess just compounded her hurt, and she has responded by playing you at your own game.

 

Now you have a woman who feels comfortable with seeing other men in your "open" relationship. You introduced the concept of polygamy to your gf, and now you are reaping what you sowed.

Whether she will truly want to go back to monogamy with you, who knows?

Sometimes once a box is opened, there is no going back.

The shoe is now on the other foot.

Can you trust her to remain true to you going forward?

I don't know, can you?

[JoeSmith357-1]

Run like hell from this one

[Joga_31]

hey guys

 

so I've been dating this girl on and off for a year or so. during this time, we've broken up a couple of times, she cheated, i cheated.. it's been really crazy.

 

but the weird part is she keeps on telling me that she likes it when i see other girls (as long as she doesn't know). she likes bad boys and likes being rejected is what she said.

 

now I've come to a point where I'm just tired of it, and I just want to be with her. but she's been wanting to break up with me the past couple of weeks. I've prevented it a bunch of times, but she keeps telling me to look for someone else.

 

she told me she went on a date with some guy the other day, and I just lost my mind... i was crying and banging the walls with my hand, and screaming to my pillow it's pathetic... but i never realized how much i loved her.

 

i don't want to lose her. she says she needs space and stuff... but i get so scared of her just dumping me out of the blue. she keeps telling me she loves me so i feel like i have nothing to worry about...

 

but i'm just wondering should i just like, give it some room.. and act like an ******* again (lol cuz she likes that)... i've been a bit sweet recently and she got shocked by it... so i don't know, i need to know how i should act... cuz i wanna be with her.

 

=( dam man, just leave her. She sounds like a you know what.

She is not someone to be in a relationship, she only good for intercourse.

 

I mean how can she directly tell you it's ok to see other woman.

Not a healthy relationship at all man.

[jstar845]

I know that you care about her. It seems like the two of you are not sure what you want in a relationship and with each other. The relationship you have is open. I see both of you deserve to be happy with each other. However, there is some confusion that you two need to clear up. It’s understandable as you stated that you two love each other, but you also stated that she went on a date and it seems she wants to move on. Therefore, you want to hold on to her and she doesn’t want the relationship. I’m wondering have you evaluated what you want in a healthy relationship?. I hope this helps.

Best wishes!

[jstar845]

I know that you care about her. It seems like the two of you are not sure what you want in a relationship and with each other. The relationship you have is open. I see both of you deserve to be happy with each other. However, there is some confusion that you two need to clear up. It’s understandable as you stated that you two love each other, but you also stated that she went on a date and it seems she wants to move on. Therefore, you want to hold on to her and she doesn’t want the relationship. I’m wondering have you evaluated what you want in a healthy relationship?. I hope this helps.

Best wishes!