Jump to content

Ex lied about being pregnant? I think the baby is mines.

Corduroy

By Corduroy
in Breaks and Breaking Up

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Corduroy Established Member

Corduroy

Posted
Posted (edited)

A couple of years ago when me and my ex were together, she told me she might be pregnant. She told me told me she wanted me present when she took the test, but took it without me, and just texted me she wasn't pregnant.

 

We broke up a short time after, she said she wants someone who's more mature, has money & can raise a family. She didn't want to struggle like her parents did. When we were arguing one day & she said "you won't be able to take care of our son!" I took it she was talking about our dog, because we joked he was our son.

 

She got into a relationship within weeks to a guy with money & they got married soon after. I got angry and spoke my mind via email & she got a restraining order on me, lying that I was stalking her and her family. So now I'm the bad guy.

 

I forgot about her for over a year, but then I saw her Instagram, and there's a picture of her baby. The kid looks exactly like me at that age. It made me wonder if it was mine, that she left me for a guy with money & said it was his baby. The kid will live a stable life without a broke dad like me. Also she had made me tell all our friends and family that we had a mutual breakup too, which i didn't understand.

 

This has got me thinking because we watched the movie "Blue Valentine" & similar thing happened. She was always sneaky & lying about things.

 

I want to ask her, but there's the restraining order. I'm depressed over this, I don't know what to do, if he's my son, I want to be apart of his life.

Edited by Corduroy
basil67 Established Member

basil67

Posted
Posted

I'm sorry you're in this situation and glad to know that you want to be a part of this boy's life if he's your son. Does the age of the child in the timeline look similar to the age a child conceived by the two of you would be? If you're not sure, ask some friends who are parents for their thoughts.

 

There's no sense asking her for the truth even if there was no restraining order - because it's highly likely that her husband believes the child is his and she won't rock that boat.

 

Anyway, if the child looks to be the right age and looks similar to you, seek legal advice.

  • Author
Corduroy Established Member

Corduroy

Posted
  • Author
Posted
I'm sorry you're in this situation and glad to know that you want to be a part of this boy's life if he's your son. Does the age of the child in the timeline look similar to the age a child conceived by the two of you would be? If you're not sure, ask some friends who are parents for their thoughts.

 

There's no sense asking her for the truth even if there was no restraining order - because it's highly likely that her husband believes the child is his and she won't rock that boat.

 

Anyway, if the child looks to be the right age and looks similar to you, seek legal advice.

 

Well, from the one picture I see, he looks to be over a year old. I don't know when she posted it because it's her icon, and her profile is private. It all makes sense now, the restraining order was a way to keep me away for good, while this new guy takes over.

 

Should I show you a side by side comparison of the kid and me at that age so I can get a second opinion before i get legal advice?

Weathergirl Member

Weathergirl

Posted
Posted

For peace of mind I would seek legal advice. Once you know what can be done, you can decide if you're prepared to take whatever route is required. It also sounds too much of a coincidence. I have a suspicion mind anyway, but I would be thinking the same as you.

 

I mean no offence to anyone, but some women can be very calculating when getting what they want. I would be getting some legal advice

  • Like 1
somegu Member

somegu

Posted
Posted

Just hire a private investigation firm to get some of the kids DNA somehow and test it or get therapy and forget about it.

LastAcorn99 Established Member

LastAcorn99

Posted
Posted

Aww…I’m sorry about this. It must be tough not knowing whether the kid is yours or not. Do you have some common friends from whom you can find out some information? While I can understand your desire to find out the truth, I would suggest you handle this matter with care; you shouldn’t put the kid under unnecessarily scrutiny if it all turns out to be just a wrong suspicion.

elaine567 Established Member

elaine567

Posted
Posted

YOU have to think very carefully about this before you rush headlong into claiming the child is yours.

 

If he is yours, then you will have to start paying for him, if he is yours. then you will have to a start seeing him regularly, and getting involved in his care. Are you prepared to do that? Do you have a job that will allow you to do that?

Are you prepared to get into the middle of his family and have to deal with an ex who may resent you, and a man who may disown him or treat him badly as he will then know he is not his son.

You may at the back of your mind want her to split up with him and you can then play happy families with your ex, but it may not turn out like that at all.

Are you actually prepared for the realities of co-parenthood?

 

If you are a single guy then he will most likely adversely affect you finding another woman as many women do not want to be involved with an ex and the baggage kids bring to any relationship.

 

But most importantly you have to think carefully about what is truly best for him here.

  • Like 1
 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...