Do women like sex just as much as men?

[ashy555]

I don't think all women like sex as much as men. Reason being not every woman will orgasm to sex where as every man(or most) do orgasm.

[Toodaloo]

It's actually question two that stops me from approaching women. I am actually a tall guy (6 foot) but im skinny with glasses on lol. Looks seem to be very important to women just as important to men in the dating world.

 

And what I meant by wanting to become a god is to just become confident. I get nervous around women. I keep thinking they are judging me, they are going to talk **** behind my back if I approach them or she will call me ugly again lol. So by GOD I just mean CONFIDENT.

 

But you guys are right I need to work on myself. I don't blame anyone else but me for failing this far in the dating world. But I'll get better

 

Right so you have the whole geek thing going on there. That is really fashionable at the moment (thank Big Bang Theory).

 

The whole looks thing is just pointless to talk about. Yes they matter in that any person wants to feel attracted to you but the thing is what turns off one person will turn on another! Fat? Thin? Brunette? Blonde? Large hands? Wonkey noses? Someone will like it and find it hawt! A while ago I had a "thing" for big noses!

 

To get confident you need to practice interacting with people. I strongly recommend you join some sort of Am' dram' group. You will have to mix with all sorts of people there and it will widen your scope and ability to read body language. It will increase your confidence and push you out of your comfort zone.

 

You seem like a half decent chap so in all honesty all I think you need to do is just accept yourself as you are and learn to be comfortable and happy with the person you are. We are all different (thank God) and its those differences that make us special. Don't hide them. Enhance them. Practice at the sports you like and read and educate yourself about the things you enjoy. Go out and live life.

 

Yes I am afraid that in western society it is pretty much down to the man to do the asking but instead of approaching with the intention of getting a date approach with the intention of finding out if that person has those attributes that would make you want to date her... is she kind? is she funny? If she seems to be those things when you talk to her, tell her and then see if she would like to go out.

 

As for rejection. In life we all get rejected all the time. Perhaps its a new job we applied for or perhaps we wanted our mates to go to a concert but they were already booked up so can't go. Rejection is a part of life and is as it is. There is no reason to get stressed or upset about it. A woman may have 101 reasons to say no. Most of the time it actually has nothing to do with you! You may catch her off guard (sometimes we say no simply because we miss that you are asking us out or because we were not expecting it!!! I have done this soooo many times!!! I actually managed to regroup with one and we had a great relationship for a long time!). Sometimes she may not be "in the mood" for example just had a massive row with her boss and you meet in a shop while she is buying tampax, chocolate and a meat cleaver...! It may be that she already has a boyfriend and even if things are bad with him or it is likely to end soon most people feel it unethical to date someone else while they are in a relationship. She may be completely smitten with her man... She may not be quite ready to date again after being dumped last week...

 

So even if you are "rejected" don't worry about it. It is not something to stress about.

 

One of the guys I work with met a woman 2 years ago and got on really well with her. He was terrified that she would reject him so he never asked. One day a conversation on here prompted me to get the "male" view. He told me that if a man fancied a woman he would ask her out. Plain and simple. He then realised what an idiot he was for talking the talk but not walking the walk and asked this girl of his dreams out! They got married earlier this year and are both very happy.

 

The point is if you do not try you will never succeed. If you try you have already increased your chances ten fold.

[Toodaloo]

I don't think all women like sex as much as men. Reason being not every woman will orgasm to sex where as every man(or most) do orgasm.

 

Urm - actually the vast majority do. Women on the whole are highly sensual beings far more so than men.

 

Sadly there are many men out there who are terrible lovers... We tend to talk and pick up tips to help us be better lovers where as many men think that all they have to do is fill the hole and shove about a bit... Porn is not a way to learn how to be a good lover.

 

I say this because I have had to "train" the vast majority of my lovers. Thankfully most have been receptive to that training. Sadly many women just do not have the confidence I do to speak up and say something so they end up staying silent and just well... getting on with what they are given for want of a better phrase.

[todreaminblue]

yes women love sex just as much as men...

 

height and looks are subjective and not as important as who the guy is.....to me anyway

[Lankan_man]

Right so you have the whole geek thing going on there. That is really fashionable at the moment (thank Big Bang Theory).

 

The whole looks thing is just pointless to talk about. Yes they matter in that any person wants to feel attracted to you but the thing is what turns off one person will turn on another! Fat? Thin? Brunette? Blonde? Large hands? Wonkey noses? Someone will like it and find it hawt! A while ago I had a "thing" for big noses!

 

To get confident you need to practice interacting with people. I strongly recommend you join some sort of Am' dram' group. You will have to mix with all sorts of people there and it will widen your scope and ability to read body language. It will increase your confidence and push you out of your comfort zone.

 

You seem like a half decent chap so in all honesty all I think you need to do is just accept yourself as you are and learn to be comfortable and happy with the person you are. We are all different (thank God) and its those differences that make us special. Don't hide them. Enhance them. Practice at the sports you like and read and educate yourself about the things you enjoy. Go out and live life.

 

Yes I am afraid that in western society it is pretty much down to the man to do the asking but instead of approaching with the intention of getting a date approach with the intention of finding out if that person has those attributes that would make you want to date her... is she kind? is she funny? If she seems to be those things when you talk to her, tell her and then see if she would like to go out.

 

As for rejection. In life we all get rejected all the time. Perhaps its a new job we applied for or perhaps we wanted our mates to go to a concert but they were already booked up so can't go. Rejection is a part of life and is as it is. There is no reason to get stressed or upset about it. A woman may have 101 reasons to say no. Most of the time it actually has nothing to do with you! You may catch her off guard (sometimes we say no simply because we miss that you are asking us out or because we were not expecting it!!! I have done this soooo many times!!! I actually managed to regroup with one and we had a great relationship for a long time!). Sometimes she may not be "in the mood" for example just had a massive row with her boss and you meet in a shop while she is buying tampax, chocolate and a meat cleaver...! It may be that she already has a boyfriend and even if things are bad with him or it is likely to end soon most people feel it unethical to date someone else while they are in a relationship. She may be completely smitten with her man... She may not be quite ready to date again after being dumped last week...

 

So even if you are "rejected" don't worry about it. It is not something to stress about.

 

One of the guys I work with met a woman 2 years ago and got on really well with her. He was terrified that she would reject him so he never asked. One day a conversation on here prompted me to get the "male" view. He told me that if a man fancied a woman he would ask her out. Plain and simple. He then realised what an idiot he was for talking the talk but not walking the walk and asked this girl of his dreams out! They got married earlier this year and are both very happy.

 

The point is if you do not try you will never succeed. If you try you have already increased your chances ten fold.

 

Thank you so much for taking the time to type all this. And I'm already putting all your advice into action. I just joined a bunch clubs about dating, entrepreneurship, careers, travelling, etc.

 

I totally agree that looks do play part but are very subjective. I was just thinking about all the dudes that are uglier than me with the cutest girls. What that girl sees in that man will always be a mystery to most men and women.

 

I think I'm too worried about not finding the right person and falling in love or worried about becoming a 30 year old virgin that has never kissed. I just read a quote: "Falling in love is not finding the right person. Its becoming the right person". Right now I'm not the "right person". I need to be myself and to do that I need to find out who myself is (if that makes any sense).

 

I also agree that women LOVE SEX!! Even though I never had sex before a wise man told me "if you have sex with a woman's mind her legs will open just for you"

 

I can relate to the story you wrote about the guy who just got married. But it didn't end up in marriage for me lol. When I was 15 I had a crush on this girl and she had a crush on me. I'm 25 now and for the past 10 years I've always thought about her but I never asked her out for the fear of being rejected! Even though I knew she liked me!!! So many people told me "she likes you!!"

and I still didn't ask her out. I know I was so pathetic. 10 years later I thought she still likes me lol and I thought it would just magically fall into place.

 

I woke up one day (earlier this month) and got news that she is in love with some other guy and they are going to get married. I thought hearing a news like this would destroy me. BUT THE OPPOSITE HAPPENED!

 

I felt free and I felt like now I have no choice but to take action talk to other girls and do bigger and better things! I felt AMAZING! I felt so motivated. I'm not going to go after her anymore. Im not even going to think about her anymore. Im not going to let my success and happiness be dependent on anyone else anymore.

 

So my unqualified advice to men and women is don't attached to someone you don't know very well. Don't build this imaginary relationship with this person in your head without getting to know him/her. You will just become a creepy stalker if you do. Go out there and build a ****ing awesome life. and men/women would just gravitate towards you.

 

Thanks again for all your advice

[takenawayfrom]

1. Do women like sex just as much as men?

 

Pretty sure my girlfriend likes sex more than I do!

 

2. Do looks matter to women?

 

Do looks matter to men? Different people care about different things to different amounts.

 

3. Does height matter to women?

 

I've been out with girls who were both taller and shorter than me, to some women it definitely matters, but others absolutely don't care. My current gf is the same height as me (5'9") and said she would never go out with a guy more than 6' because she hates having to look up that much to kiss.

 

I think however you should stop asking these questions because they are irrelevant, if you want to be better with women you need to not worry about being better with women and just fake confidence with them, do that enough and you'll become confident. Confidence is all that matters.

[LookAtThisPOst]

Funny how the posts here reflect how women like sex just as much as men to, but in the same breath, I wonder why there are so many sexless marriages these days?

 

Those constant, "I gotta headache" moments.

[lgspot]

Think about this:

 

A man and a woman were having drinks when they got into an argument over which gender enjoyed sex more. The man said, Men obviously enjoy sex more than women. Why do you think we’re so obsessed with getting laid?That doesn’t prove anything! the woman countered. Think about this! when your ear itches and you put your finger in it to scratch, then pull it out, which feels better, your ear or your finger?

.

[GunslingerRoland]

It's actually question two that stops me from approaching women. I am actually a tall guy (6 foot) but im skinny with glasses on lol. Looks seem to be very important to women just as important to men in the dating world.

 

That seems like a lousy reason. A lot of women like skinny men, and if you want to get bigger, nothing is stopping you from drinking a couple of high calories shakes a day and joining a gym. You won't necessary become Arnold, but it should make a difference. Also glasses are a lot more stylish these days than they were 30 years ago, I'm not sure that many women are horribly opposed to dating a man simply because they wear glasses. If you don't want them, laser eye surgery or contacts could be options.

 

 

Sounds like you need to just suck it up and get out there.

[Toodaloo]

Funny how the posts here reflect how women like sex just as much as men to, but in the same breath, I wonder why there are so many sexless marriages these days?

 

Those constant, "I gotta headache" moments.

 

All those folks who joke about not having it for months after they got married? Yeah most are joking because its a classic joke...

 

I know my parents are still "active" after far more years than I really want to think about. My Grandparents are still active and went and sought advise on how to keep it "safe" after a heart attack...

 

Sex also releases endorphin's that help get rid of head aches, period cramps, stomach aches...

 

Many women know this.

 

If its a sexless marriage then there are other issues than sex. normally that one partner doesn't feel loved or appreciated any more. That has absolutely nothing to do with whether women like sex or not. that is a question of will women drop their knickers for just anyone - the general answer to that is no.

[RecentChange]

That seems like a lousy reason. A lot of women like skinny men, and if you want to get bigger, nothing is stopping you from drinking a couple of high calories shakes a day and joining a gym. You won't necessary become Arnold, but it should make a difference. Also glasses are a lot more stylish these days than they were 30 years ago, I'm not sure that many women are horribly opposed to dating a man simply because they wear glasses. If you don't want them, laser eye surgery or contacts could be options.

 

Sounds like you need to just suck it up and get out there.

 

Yeah, these are lame excuses - not reasons. I totally have a thing for guys with cute glasses Get some that compliment your look, and are stylish. Seriously they can set you apart from the crowd.

[central]

If its a sexless marriage then there are other issues than sex. normally that one partner doesn't feel loved or appreciated any more. That has absolutely nothing to do with whether women like sex or not. that is a question of will women drop their knickers for just anyone - the general answer to that is no.

 

Women in general may like sex as much as men, but most have considerably higher barriers to entry than do men. <pun intended>

[ashy555]

Urm - actually the vast majority do. Women on the whole are highly sensual beings far more so than men.

 

I have seen different studies who have said only 1 in 3 can. I have seen 50/50. I have seen a study that said 75% struggle etc etc. So i don't know the exact scientific facts. Lets say 50/50 can actually orgasm through penetration. That is still less than 99-100% for men. So I'd definitely say majority of men enjoy it more than majority of women.

 

BUT everyone is different, so who knows for sure!

[anika99]

I have seen different studies who have said only 1 in 3 can. I have seen 50/50. I have seen a study that said 75% struggle etc etc. So i don't know the exact scientific facts. Lets say 50/50 can actually orgasm through penetration. That is still less than 99-100% for men. So I'd definitely say majority of men enjoy it more than majority of women.

 

BUT everyone is different, so who knows for sure!

 

Yes there are many women who cannot orgasm by vaginal penetration alone. I am one of those woman. I will orgasm during intercourse but only if my clitorous is getting some attention too. However having sex doesn't just mean sticking a penis in a vagina. Foreplay, oral, stroking, kissing, licking, touching are all components of having sex. Therefore I love sex and orgasm almost 100% of the time. I need clitoral stimulation to orgasm but being penetrated during clitoral stimulation produces mind blowing amazing orgasms so of course I look forward to that and love doing it.

[Phoenician]

I don't think all women like sex as much as men. Reason being not every woman will orgasm to sex where as every man(or most) do orgasm.

 

Women who have not experienced good sex due to any reason : ( social , religious, bad relationship,etc ...) will not like sex , Others will be normal .

[Toodaloo]

I have seen different studies who have said only 1 in 3 can. I have seen 50/50. I have seen a study that said 75% struggle etc etc. So i don't know the exact scientific facts. Lets say 50/50 can actually orgasm through penetration. That is still less than 99-100% for men. So I'd definitely say majority of men enjoy it more than majority of women.

 

BUT everyone is different, so who knows for sure!

 

And these comments just highlight the issue.

 

As I have said before many men are bad lovers with out meaning to be and think that all they have to do is poke it in the hole... hence so many women just lay back and start working out their finances or what to cook for supper tomorrow instead of being in the moment and enjoying it...

 

I orgasm most times... if he isn't doing it right, I show him... I tend to climax faster, harder and more often than he does. Once I have trained them up its like this with the majority of my lovers. But most do need training up first.

 

If it is a case of just poking a penis into a hole then I am afraid I would rather read my book thanks.

[joseb]

And these comments just highlight the issue.

 

As I have said before many men are bad lovers with out meaning to be and think that all they have to do is poke it in the hole... hence so many women just lay back and start working out their finances or what to cook for supper tomorrow instead of being in the moment and enjoying it...

 

I orgasm most times... if he isn't doing it right, I show him... I tend to climax faster, harder and more often than he does. Once I have trained them up its like this with the majority of my lovers. But most do need training up first.

 

If it is a case of just poking a penis into a hole then I am afraid I would rather read my book thanks.

 

Am I the only one that slightly disturbed by all the 'training' talk? We are not dogs!

 

And it's great that you know what you want and can impart that to guys (please don't say train).

But that's not to say that they are bad lovers at all necessarily - just that the particular things you like or the way you like it isn't how their previous gfs liked it.

Every woman is different - annoyingly so!

Just because you 'trained' these guys to perform for you does not mean that the next girl they sleep with will be any the better for it.

In fact, they may really have a hard time of it.

 

The last girl I was with was really glad I wasn't jumping through hoops - the guy before had this bag of tricks he though were great but turned her off completely. He insisted that she had to like the things he was doing because his ex did!

[csj77]

Funny how the posts here reflect how women like sex just as much as men to, but in the same breath, I wonder why there are so many sexless marriages these days?

 

Those constant, "I gotta headache" moments.

 

How do you know this is what happens behind closed doors? Are you married? And is your wife giving you this excuse?

Unless you've been in the room, you can't say women have "headaches".

[Toodaloo]

Am I the only one that slightly disturbed by all the 'training' talk? We are not dogs!

 

And it's great that you know what you want and can impart that to guys (please don't say train).

But that's not to say that they are bad lovers at all necessarily - just that the particular things you like or the way you like it isn't how their previous gfs liked it.

Every woman is different - annoyingly so!

Just because you 'trained' these guys to perform for you does not mean that the next girl they sleep with will be any the better for it.

In fact, they may really have a hard time of it.

 

The last girl I was with was really glad I wasn't jumping through hoops - the guy before had this bag of tricks he though were great but turned her off completely. He insisted that she had to like the things he was doing because his ex did!

 

Oh I don't know JoseB when you train a dog you give them a treat when they get it right... Same goes with men. Training, teaching, learning its all the same thing.

 

I believe that women are far more open to learning a new partners likes and dislikes. Far more so than men.

 

The last girl you were with clearly had my attitude! Good on her for making sure she enjoyed those moments!

 

What I "train" the men I am with to do is "listen" for the subtle cues, the catching of breath etc that all mean "please continue right there!". I "train" them to communicate. I "train" them to show me what they like and to listen to what I like. Its what makes it so explosive.

 

Hate to say it but we also change with mood. That time you were rough with us last night and we loved it doesn't mean it will work tomorrow when we need some tenderness and gentle touches...

 

Note taken that the leather studded collar is not for you...

[Springsummer]

Depends on the woman, I suppose. I'm a woman who is way more turned on by brains. I've had gorgeous men who couldn't string together a cohesive thought who couldn't keep my interest for more than a few days and have had long-term relationships with brilliant men that many wouldn't give a second glance at.

 

I just learnt there is word for that: 'sapiosexual'.

[understand50]

In a word "YES". Any man who believes otherwise is deluding himself.

[jen1447]

Am I the only one that slightly disturbed by all the 'training' talk? We are not dogs!

 

And it's great that you know what you want and can impart that to guys (please don't say train).

But that's not to say that they are bad lovers at all necessarily - just that the particular things you like or the way you like it isn't how their previous gfs liked it.

Every woman is different - annoyingly so!

Just because you 'trained' these guys to perform for you does not mean that the next girl they sleep with will be any the better for it.

In fact, they may really have a hard time of it.

 

The last girl I was with was really glad I wasn't jumping through hoops - the guy before had this bag of tricks he though were great but turned her off completely. He insisted that she had to like the things he was doing because his ex did!

 

You can take exception to the word "training" but that's essentially what all couples who have good sex do w each other - communicate what works and practice it to a high level.

 

A good lover is someone who's open-minded and able to be 'trained,' not someone who has a list of moves or techniques and uses them like a routine. That's actually a really dumb lover bc it's not innovative or responsive at all, just methodical.

 

What Toodles would impart to her lovers that would be useful down the line via her 'training' isn't to use moves x-y-z that worked for her but to learn to be adaptive and sexually communicative in general. Believe it or not, many men simply aren't very instinctively effective that way.

[MightyPen]

I think the women on these boards actually like sex MORE than the men do. I'm not sure if this would hold true in a larger sample size, or if perhaps the nature of these boards either: 1) allows people to be most honest and open about their desires, 2) encourages people to exaggerate to make themselves look better, or 3) draws people who have more intense sexual drives in the first place.

 

Someone should write a paper on this.

[The_Onceler]

It's the looks part that I am insecure about. I don't think any woman has found me to be attractive ever. So I can only rely on my personality.

 

I recall being witness to this conversation, way back in my college days, between my room mate and one of our professors (a woman). We had another professor who was pregnant, and particularly unattractive. Regarding her:

 

Room mate: I can't even believe she got pregnant!

Professor: Why not - your parents taught you about the birds and the bees, right?

 

Room mate: Yeah, but she's so UGLY - who would want to get with her?

Professor: (thinks for a moment) An ugly guy?

[Toodaloo]

I think the women on these boards actually like sex MORE than the men do. I'm not sure if this would hold true in a larger sample size, or if perhaps the nature of these boards either: 1) allows people to be most honest and open about their desires, 2) encourages people to exaggerate to make themselves look better, or 3) draws people who have more intense sexual drives in the first place.

 

Someone should write a paper on this.

 

On the whole my female friends say this about their sex lives...

 

If my partner were more attentive I would want more but I just can't be bothered with it. Its a chore.

 

Those I have encouraged to speak to their partners and loaned a few of my sex books to for them to read or leave about so their partners (out of sheer curiosity because that is what men do when women leave a sex book around) read them. It opened up discussion and their sex lives got a whole lot better and stayed better.

 

Embarrassingly I also include my parents in this... They are far more "active" and also both much happier since my mother was brave enough to speak up.

 

It is not a new phenomenon. Its been going on for years hence why we have the cliches and stereotype sayings about marriage and sex.