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Using a gaming app to approach women in public


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  • Author
Posted
We all have our preferences. If you refuse to date guys who enjoy a completely harmless hobby that gets people out of the house, and out speaking with other people, that is up to you.

 

I am 37, and I play it. The girl I am seeing, she is the same age, and she plays it. In fact, I am going to take her on a Pokemon GO date, where we take a walk through some nature trails, enjoy the scenery, and catch some Pokemon while we are at it. It makes for a great date, as long as the guy has the right girl to take with him.

 

Really? There are women over 35 that are attracted to men who play Pokemon GO? lol I was figuring it would harm your chances than do any good. Figured it was more of, at the most, a college aged demographic, 18 to 25.

  • Author
Posted
That's an unfortunate name :eek:

 

PokeDates...collect 'em all!! :laugh:

Posted
That's an unfortunate name :eek:

 

:laugh: Yes, it is.

Posted
PokeDates...collect 'em all!! :laugh:

 

Poke 'em all!!!

  • Like 4
Posted
Come on. I play the game and this is effing ridiculous. :laugh: If someone wants want to talk to you while playing they will. If they're not... they don't want to. They really shouldn't need to say 'talk to the hand' for you to get the message.

 

Just trying to figure out why didn't that guy have a clue. He totally missed the sign of her walking off and even followed her.

 

You can see how this could go all sorts of wrong, right? :confused: Could even lead to her being abused - verbally OR physically. Nobody owes a stranger a straight-up comment like that. Moving away isn't a subtle hint, and it really concerns me that you guys think it's 'subtle'! :eek: It's a gigantic, in-your-face hint that 99% of the human population understands past the age of 12. Same as how we all understand that someone raising the middle finger isn't trying to tell you they like you. She didn't exactly push her hair behind her left ear instead of right and expect him to understand that it was code for 'not interested'.

 

Because when we have done this we have been subjected to worse behavior, insults, grabbing, slut shaming and all because we say no to a stranger. This normally happens when someones behavior is "off" and to keep going after 2 very big hints is behaving in an "off" way.

 

Here I thought such things were extreme cases.

 

Not all guys are psycho and can take rejection, but I can understand that women don't want to take the risk. It's a shame that women feel that they can't speak their mind outright, but a few jerks ruin it for everyone.

Posted
Just trying to figure out why didn't that guy have a clue. He totally missed the sign of her walking off and even followed her.

 

Extreme social ineptness is my guess.

 

Here I thought such things were extreme cases.

 

Not all guys are psycho and can take rejection, but I can understand that women don't want to take the risk. It's a shame that women feel that they can't speak their mind outright, but a few jerks ruin it for everyone.

Yeah, you're right that lots of guys, probably even the majority, wouldn't go crazy after a rejection. But yeah, can't really take the risk, especially if you're alone. I wouldn't risk it, personally. It's not my duty to risk my safety for the sake of benefiting socially inept dudes.
  • Like 1
Posted

I'm going to try, "Please Pokemon GO AWAY!"

  • Like 2
Posted
Extreme social ineptness is my guess.

 

Yeah, you're right that lots of guys, probably even the majority, wouldn't go crazy after a rejection. But yeah, can't really take the risk, especially if you're alone. I wouldn't risk it, personally. It's not my duty to risk my safety for the sake of benefiting socially inept dudes.

 

Because that is how many guys who do go psycho on you like to be when they go psycho...

 

Sadly its also the time when socially inept and shy guys make their approaches too...

  • Like 1
Posted
I'm going to try, "Please Pokemon GO AWAY!"

 

Dude would probably take that as a 'sign' she wanted them to be alone, at the rate he was going... :p

  • Like 1
Posted

Why not use the ap called Happn? It pairs you with people you cross paths with in real life. That way you can the avoid the discomfort of approaching them or the embarrassment of them wanting you to not talk to them.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted

It's kind of like which is worse, approaching at all, or approaching and annoying a woman for you approaching to begin with.

 

Though, I wouldn't push if she's just going "Mmm hmm" and not looking at me, but you have to think that's what she's thinking. *Yeah, we found the same rare monster, in the same park, guess we should get married then, right?*

Posted

Folks, since the topic is more about gaming apps like Pokemon as a date-meeting vehicle than about individual dating experiences, moderation merged two threads on a similar topic and left it running in our Dating forum. Please continue discussion of gaming apps and dating in this thread. Thanks!

  • Like 1
Posted

If she's grocery shopping, ask to help her with her bags. If she's standing in line at Starbucks, say something nice and then offer to buy her coffee. That's the type of thing our grandparents did, and that's not really what men do today. You guys approach with weird cheesy lines, with this attitude of being entitled to some ecstatic response, and then get irritated when we blow you off because we're unimpressed.

 

For guys dating gets more like serfdom every day.

Posted

And while lately there was a glimpse of light appearing at the end of the tunnel, after many years a hope for men to get their $hit back together, Pokemon Go emerges and the tunnel...collapses on their heads!

  • Like 5
  • Author
Posted
And while lately there was a glimpse of light appearing at the end of the tunnel, after many years a hope for men to get their $hit back together, Pokemon Go emerges and the tunnel...collapses on their heads!

 

Not sure what you mean. lol

Posted (edited)

To be blunt...if a guy spends too much of his childhood formative years being a shut-in recluse (and this includes playing too many video games...I say this as a gamer myself) and/or spends too much time in virtual-land...then that person is going to fail to develop sufficient and important social skills that are VITAL to have as an adult. That includes learning social/cultural awareness, and it also includes being able to recognize the social cues and body language of others...including whether a woman seems approachable or not. He will be way behind socially (and it may not be easy to "catch up") and will be a child in a man's body. Combine that social ineptness with a natural attraction/lust for a woman...and the resulting stew is likely going to be bad. Especially if the guy has no empathy or respect for women.

 

It's good that Pokemon Go is getting these folks out of the house and in public. But if you do not know how to be presentable in public, and don't know how to engage with the public, including attractive women around your age...you're going to run into serious trouble eventually. That including knowing when to leave someone alone. What the woman in OP's link experienced (along with the number of other incidents surrounding Pokemon Go) doesn't surprise me at all.

 

That said, although Pokemon itself has been very popular worldwide for 20 years, I think Pokemon Go is a fad that will fade away later this year. (Unless Niantic/Nintendo do more with the app to sustain interest.) Most previously reclusive awkward geeks will go back to being recluses. Some other "big hyped thing" will probably come along and capture the attention of the masses, causing them to largely forget about Pokemon Go.

Edited by GravityMan
  • Like 4
Posted

Wait until you can TRADE or BATTLE Pokemon without a Gym...

 

I think that it's a good thing for the extreme gamers to get out of the house, join the human race and TRY to talk to people.

 

Gravity is right about the social cues...what if the opposite is true? What if a girl actually digs a guy who is catching Pokemon, but since he can't tell the difference between her being friendly and her being interested, he mistakes her for simply being platonic?

Posted
Do women really like being approached, at all...even initially, even if the guy doesn't push?

 

There's an easy answer to that...

 

If the guy is attractive, fit, well dressed and appears to be wealthy, then yes.

 

If not, then no. It's that simple. It's an awesome double standard women get away with. Same thing with guys whistling at a girl, if it's a hot dude, it's great for them and they love it. If it's some fat nerd, then it's all about guys objectifying them.

  • Like 1
Posted
There's an easy answer to that...

 

If the guy is attractive, fit, well dressed and appears to be wealthy, then yes.

 

If not, then no. It's that simple. It's an awesome double standard women get away with. Same thing with guys whistling at a girl, if it's a hot dude, it's great for them and they love it. If it's some fat nerd, then it's all about guys objectifying them.

 

I love how some men somehow speak for all women, everywhere. :rolleyes:

  • Like 4
Posted

I think that it's a good thing for the extreme gamers to get out of the house, join the human race and TRY to talk to people.

 

I sorta chuckled at 'extreme gamers' and 'mobile app game' being in the same sentence :p, but in all seriousness that's true. I think the 'hatch the eggs' mechanic is a decent way to gamify walking as well, like a step counter.

 

Gravity is right about the social cues...what if the opposite is true? What if a girl actually digs a guy who is catching Pokemon, but since he can't tell the difference between her being friendly and her being interested, he mistakes her for simply being platonic?

 

Everyone's been there, at least once... :) They can start off as friends and hopefully someone asks the other out later (hopefully not TOO much later).

  • Like 2
Posted
I sorta chuckled at 'extreme gamers' and 'mobile app game' being in the same sentence :p
I had the same reaction. When I think of "extreme gamers", I think of eSports competitors.
  • Like 1
Posted
I had the same reaction. When I think of "extreme gamers", I think of eSports competitors.

 

Yep, ditto. Ironically some of those guys are decent with conversation and interpreting body language (based on watching their interviews), and even have girlfriends, despite playing games for a living!

 

So really, there's no excuse for Pokemon GO dude in the OP's article. ;)

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
Many women in their 30's and up are a little judgemental when it comes to men playing any video games, but not all of them are like that. I think Pokemon GO has quite a few ladies in that age bracket playing. I know the girl I am seeing is into it a little, and I have seen plenty of older people out playing it. When I was out today, I had a dude in his 50's playing in the same park my date and I were in.

 

IMO, any woman who suddenly would not be attracted to a guy because of a harmless hobby is undateable anyway. A woman not dating a man because he likes Pokemon would be like me saying I wouldn't date a girl that plays Monopoly. It's just silly. I have more important things I look for in a partner. Another reason some guys prefer younger ladies. More fun, less judgemental about dumb crap.

 

Yeah, I know what you mean. Funny, I emailed quite a few geek girls on OK Cupid, remarking on their pictures at the local convention and such. I would typically get a little more excited considering I figured I might get response from them because I'd get a little more into talking about said convention and other "geeky interests, only to be ignored.

 

Seems that's not even a motivator to respond, esp. since over 30 geeks are hard to find these days. It's kind of like finding a unicorn.

 

That's what sucks about online dating, had I met them in person, I'm pretty sure I'd gotten the digits and date...it's just that these ladies get inundated with emails they just overlook a lot of them.

 

I think I bumped into one that I had emailed on OK Cupid at a local convention, but I don't think she was interested. She was like, "Didn't I see you at the con last year?" and I was like "Yep" but she didn't "Stop" to talk, she was with a female friend.

 

(It wasn't really the con, it was OK Cupid, but I wasn't going to say that)

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