colette26 Posted May 30, 2016 Posted May 30, 2016 I've been seeing a guy (21) for about a month. I haven't established if we are just casual or something more serious yet. Personally i think its too early to bring out the 'what are we?' question. We had sex for the first time last week. It didn't last long because he was nervous and the rest if self explanatory. Anyway, he slept over last night and I was expecting him to make a move, as I've never really slept in the same bed with a guy who hasn't at least given it a shot. Granted he said he was really tired but from experience if sex is on the cards most guys would push through. We cuddled and kissed quite intimately but that was all. He had to leave early for work the next morning. I'm honestly totally fine with cuddling but I just think that his behaviour is a bit out of the ordinary in the scheme of things. These are the following possibilities I've come up with as to why he didn't try to have sex. 1. Was generally too tired 2. Was worried about not performing again 3. Isn't interested in me sexually anymore/Just wants the attention without the commitment Anyone have any opinions?
Author colette26 Posted May 30, 2016 Author Posted May 30, 2016 Should also probably add that I've known the guy for over a year, but just as friends/acquaintances.
Dis Posted May 30, 2016 Posted May 30, 2016 If I had to guess, he was probably kinda ashamed of his poor performance the last time he came over, and was a bit hesitant to try again at the moment. I second this. It can be a big blow to a guy's ego if he cant get it up. Some guys get really embarrassed and have a hard time getting past it. My advice is...dont push the sex....be patient....when he's ready he'll make a move. While I wouldnt wait forever for it to happen (he needs to have some level of confidence in the bedroom) I would give him some time...esp if he's a keeper 3
Mumbles Posted May 30, 2016 Posted May 30, 2016 I reckon theres an even chance he's just trying to be a gentleman - in the old style SNAG sense. He's pretty young, perhaps doesn't have that much experience yet and quite possibly may think that women are not as sexually driven as men are (I used to think this back in the day). How many opportunities did I miss trying to be the SNAG when I was in my late teens and early twenties? Heaps. The girl just wanted a good shag, and there I was trying to show her that I was interested in her as a person, not just a good fyk. Tell me, did he have a woody poking you in the back all night? I'm trying to make fun of it all, but that simple and rather funny fact will point to a lot. 3
joseb Posted May 30, 2016 Posted May 30, 2016 I second this. It can be a big blow to a guy's ego if he cant get it up. I didn't see that, from my understanding it was the opposite?
Emilia Posted May 30, 2016 Posted May 30, 2016 I think he just needs to get more comfortable with you OP. Give him a bit more time. As long as there is communication, it's all good for the moment.
Otter2569 Posted May 30, 2016 Posted May 30, 2016 I agree with the previous posters that he most likely feels embarrassed and inadequate from his prior attempt at sex. Personally if I was interested on someone it wouldn't matter how tired I was, when I had to work or if the house was on fire...i'd be all over her. If my junk wasn't cooperating (most guys have had that happen at one point or another) I would be waiting outside my doctors door the next morning. 1
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