is dating a transsexual gay? Does that make me bisexual?

[EatYourVeggies]

1st-No straight guy would even attempt to get close to a girl with a dong like that..let alone be physically involved.

2nd- if you have to ask then you most certainly are.

 

What they said.

 

What do you call it? I will call it one thing and very certain you will call it another. Who cares.

 

Plus, who really has the time or cares to keep up with all the really scientific sounding or PC terms they call things these days.

Edited February 27, 2016 by EatYourVeggies

[Jabron1]

Gender is a social construct.

 

No, it isn't. I, as a man, have 15 times more testosterone that you do. If you suddenly got 15 times the amount of testosterone, you would be acting completely differently than you currently are. You would be a different person entirely. Society didn't make that happen; nature did.

 

OP, life is too short. Just do whatever makes you happy. The sooner you stop worrying about what other's think, the freer you will be to pursue what makes you happy. That goes for staying with her or dumping her.

 

If she has a penis, and that's a no-no, then I suggest you walk away ASAP. Do it nicely, but do it swiftly. Any messing around will only hurt the both of you.

 

My aunt is transsexual. There are guys that go for that sort of thing. So don't think she needs you to do her a favour by hanging around in a half-hearted way. Let her be happy with someone who's into it.

[preraph]

I don't think you can categorize yourself as gay or bi just because you're attracted to a transsexual. You don't want to have to do with her penis, but want to have sex, so you need to be honest with her about that. Tell her you're not into penis, but you are into her, but not her penis. Talk it out. She probably wishes she didn't have one anyway. So ask her, "What do you like to do as far as having sex?" And find out if there's anything mutually agreeable to both of you. It's wonderful you're so tolerant. Now, don't start worrying about yourself or your sexuality or trying to categorize it. You like her and you're tolerant. And you'll just have to have an honest conversation with her about whether you can both agree on some form of sex.

[ses]

There are plenty of self-identified straight guys who date and are attracted to trans women—it doesn't mean they're gay or bi. If you're uncomfortable with her penis, then break up with her as she deserves someone who's willing to accept and be comfortable with her anatomy. An intersex or trans individual are born the way they are, and you need to either accept her as she is, or let he find someone who can. It doesn't make you a bad person—you're just incompatible with her.

[EatYourVeggies]

There are plenty of self-identified straight guys who date and are attracted to trans women

 

LOL! No there aren't.

 

it doesn't mean they're gay or bi.

 

Yes it does.

 

You won't ever convince one straight guy (who actually is and doesn't just say it) no matter how many times you try.

[justaguy19]

Ok, I dont know if this is a serious post or not, but here are my thoughts:

 

You are normally attracted to females only, right? You are never attracted to males, right? If you answer 'Yes' to both, then you are straight.

 

When it comes to this person, your consciousness sees what it thinks is a female...if this person had not told you they have a penis, then you would have never known the difference. The 'reptile brain' thinks its a woman, therefore, you are attracted to that.

 

But you know that there is a penis under the clothing...as long as you have no sexual desire to do anything with said penis, then you are not bi, or gay...you are straight.

 

This person may have a female mind, but they have a male body, all the way down to the chromosomal level. Its a GUY...but your mind visually cannot tell the difference. Your nose may pick up that its a guy though, at the pheromone level. But you can still be attracted. Your mind is currently 'tricked' into thinking that its a female.

 

It is possible though, that if you two are making out etc, if you fall 'in love', you may be totally ok with doing, uh, 'other' things with her (oral, anal), because you love her. At that point, you will do anything she asks, or wants, because you love her. You wont mind doing the other things, because you just love pleasing her, and letting her please you.

 

I dont know though; I have never been in that scenario. These are all just my guesses. LOL

 

 

 

 

 

I made a terrible mistake. Yeah I thought it made no sense that she'd be transgender or close to it. She has just a weird form of an intersex condition. But she's mostly female. I thought when she said she had a dick it meant she didn't have a pussy. And that I'd have to have gay sex with her if it got to that point. Thankfully that's not the case. The whole intersex thing is really confusing to me. And when I looked it up I got individuals who are were similar to transsexuals. Like caroline cossey or alex macfarlane. But she explained her condition is a bit different than that. She wasbn't even raised a boy and she's never been legally determined of the male sex. She said she personally identifies as neither and that being intersex is significant in her life. But she is mostly female as far physically. I got it all wrong my bad.

[justaguy19]

If you "like her as a person", then why did you say (and I quote):

 

 

 

 

You didn't say "I guess I have got to find a girl like her (but without a penis)"; you were very clear it's just about her looks...i.e., her physical being and her physical presence.

 

 

Since you know you don't find a penis attractive, it's going to be difficult for you to be sexually attracted to her once she's completely naked...which is an important component to normal, healthy, adult relationships.

 

That's why I said you should let her go. You both deserve a normal, healthy, adult relationship.

Well the other goes without saying if I intended to date any girl long term like I intended with her. It's just I actually have never dated a girl as beautiful and perfect as her.

[justaguy19]

OP, is this a guy who identifies as a girl? Or is it a person who was born with both male and female genitalia?

 

Given your age, I would advise you not to be sexually active with anyone and friends with boys and girls both.

 

Given your post, though, it seems you expect to be sexual. If you have any doubts at all you would be wise not to engage in sex with anyone you have doubts about as it could come back to mess with your mind afterwards.

 

You're young and still developing your belief system and your psyche. Don't do anything to cause extra confusion in your life at this age and which may haunt you later on. Being a teenager is difficult enough without throwing in something out of the ordinary, such as getting sexual with a woman who has a penis.

 

When you have sex with a person it is healthy to be certain of what you are doing and give your whole heart and mind to them with no reservations. This is both for your sake and for the sake of the person you're engaging with.

She has an intersex condition she wasn't born a boy. I just perceived what she said to mean that. I don't have issue with it currentlyas I thought she just had male genitalia. I don't have to have gay sex when our relationship gets more intimate so I'm totally fine with her the way she is. No reservations about it. But if it had turned out that she was actually a man I wouldn't date her.

[justaguy19]

You are bi...how do I know?

1st-No straight guy would even attempt to get close to a girl with a dong like that..let alone be physically involved.

2nd- if you have to ask then you most certainly are.

 

I think your problem lies in finding yourself and what you like but if you like her even with being born as a guy and can see pass that, then you shouldn't have to change your mind because you believe you're not gay or bi. The fact of the matter is you don't have to even label what you are or what she is , as long as it's working for you.

If you like her then go for it. The physical part of it not working though I understand..as it's not close to have a real woman's genitals so if you're a sexual person and looking for the real thing, it might not work out..

This really sucks I guess. Wish you good luck.

I'm not physically involved with her I said in the beginning there has been no sex of any kind... And secondly I didn't know and she wasn't born male so I feel like I am attracted to her much more due to the fact that she was also born female.