ldridge12 Posted December 23, 2015 Posted December 23, 2015 Here's the recap of what happened to me: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/554884-i-messed-up-broke-no-contact-because-i-found-out-something-so-hurtful Outside of this issue, one of the main reasons we broke up is over the summer I was going through a lot with my grandma and my mom both having cancer. One fighting for her life [the former] and the latter just being diagnosed. It sucked. I was just depressed through it all. When I asked for her support and for her [before the breakup] time [visit my grandma in hospice or my mom who was at home recovering from tumor removal surgery], she, who was on summer vacation herself said: "I WILL VISIT YOUR FAMILY ON MY TIME. THIS IS MY SUMMER. MY TIME. AND ILL VISIT THEM WHEN I WANT." I was dumbfounded and appalled by that comment and it led to the breakup and then everything i found in the thread above just threw me over the edge. I lost my grandma a few days ago and within the same weeekend saw my ex girlfriend from a distance for the first time in 3 months. It really flushed me. Made me feel like as seeing her was like seeing a ghost. Sucks. Just wish anyone had advice for dealing with two tough blows at once. Just felt abandoned in this tough period though I will say i've been strong no contact for close to two months now.
luvflower Posted December 24, 2015 Posted December 24, 2015 I'm so sorry for you loss... Both losses. I went through the same thing. I lost two grandparents while my relationship was falling apart. Coping can be pure hell especially if your SO is selfish and has no understanding of how a sick/dying relative demands and exerts so much of your energy,just the same as a crappy relationship. They're both draining on different levels. Focus on being there for your family. Your ex seems to just be very immature and trying to divert your attention to her. Let her be nasty and know that you have to be there for your family and while trying to keep your OWN SANITY ,in the midst of this storm. I know that her support would be great but everyone is different . She sounds a bit cold... Keep posting here especially if it helps... Wishing you the best of healing. Peace
Author ldridge12 Posted December 24, 2015 Author Posted December 24, 2015 I'm so sorry for you loss... Both losses. I went through the same thing. I lost two grandparents while my relationship was falling apart. Coping can be pure hell especially if your SO is selfish and has no understanding of how a sick/dying relative demands and exerts so much of your energy,just the same as a crappy relationship. They're both draining on different levels. Focus on being there for your family. Your ex seems to just be very immature and trying to divert your attention to her. Let her be nasty and know that you have to be there for your family and while trying to keep your OWN SANITY ,in the midst of this storm. I know that her support would be great but everyone is different . She sounds a bit cold... Keep posting here especially if it helps... Wishing you the best of healing. Peace Her behavior was just immature in my eyes she basically overlapped me. It is what it is while at the same time pretty much abandoning me on my time of need with my family. It sucks. It really does but there's not much I can do.
Author ldridge12 Posted December 24, 2015 Author Posted December 24, 2015 I'm so sorry for you loss... Both losses. I went through the same thing. I lost two grandparents while my relationship was falling apart. Coping can be pure hell especially if your SO is selfish and has no understanding of how a sick/dying relative demands and exerts so much of your energy,just the same as a crappy relationship. They're both draining on different levels. Focus on being there for your family. Your ex seems to just be very immature and trying to divert your attention to her. Let her be nasty and know that you have to be there for your family and while trying to keep your OWN SANITY ,in the midst of this storm. I know that her support would be great but everyone is different . She sounds a bit cold... Keep posting here especially if it helps... Wishing you the best of healing. Peace She's furious I took my portion of revenge by exposing her to her friends in that bcc email and people will call it petty and immature but I was just enraged wh n I found out everything.
Recommended Posts