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Should the Dumpee contact the Dumper?


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Posted

I was just talking to my mom about this today... We both have the same opinion. That the Dumpee shouldn't EVER contact, as he/she was dumped.

 

My ex (girlfriends break during exams; led me to false hope), texted me a month ago saying that when she came home from vacation, she would contact me again, as she wants to try again...

Haven't heard anything from her, for a month now. Should I just keep on with my NC? Things are going good.

Posted

As a general proposition the dumpee is powerless.

 

 

Here since your EX reached out to you about getting back together if you want to get back with her, you two will have to speak. So in this instance, I think you can call.

 

 

permission aside unless the things that broke you up have been fixed, there is no sense trying to reconcile.

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Posted
As a general proposition the dumpee is powerless.

 

 

Here since your EX reached out to you about getting back together if you want to get back with her, you two will have to speak. So in this instance, I think you can call.

 

 

permission aside unless the things that broke you up have been fixed, there is no sense trying to reconcile.

 

 

Well, I don't know if they have been fixed. I have honestly no idea... I just feel like that if I contact her, things will just go downhill again.

Posted
Well, I don't know if they have been fixed. I have honestly no idea... I just feel like that if I contact her, things will just go downhill again.

 

Then that is your answer. Do not contact her again. What is the problem?

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Posted
Then that is your answer. Do not contact her again. What is the problem?

 

True... also.. I've godt reminded of the things which annoys me..

 

I couldn't be with my friends. AND. She wouldn't let me go home to get my medicine. She would get so angry at me. (anti-depressants. I have anxiety)... I also think that is SO wrong? Or is that just me

Posted

Of course it's wrong. It's not love if you don't want all of a person or want that person to change. You deserve someone who can empathize with you about your mental health, not condemn you.

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Posted

True. And the part with friends. I should be able to hang out with my friends right?

Posted

If your exgirlfriend is not texting you, that means you are not top priority. So if you are not top priority, why are you making her yours?

 

NC is NC for a reason. And based on my personal past expereinces, I advice you to never reach out again.

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Posted

Why would she ask me to go again, but never come back to me?

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Posted

Out of the blue, I got a text from her best friend. She said;

"Hey! I shouldn't really be telling you this, but I really like you, and I don't understand why ******** would treat you like this. Anyways. I spoke with her, and she told me, that she is not sure how she is feeling/what she wants... Hope you are doing okay, and that you and her will get back together"...

 

What........

Posted
Out of the blue, I got a text from her best friend. She said;

"Hey! I shouldn't really be telling you this, but I really like you, and I don't understand why ******** would treat you like this. Anyways. I spoke with her, and she told me, that she is not sure how she is feeling/what she wants... Hope you are doing okay, and that you and her will get back together"...

 

What........

 

Wow, I'm sorry no one had responded to this last post... You must be confused to say the least...

 

Words that come to mind when reading what her "friend" said: game playing, confusion, immaturity.

 

I feel like your ex put your friend up to it. They're trying to get a reaction from you. Don't respond. If you must, don't act to emotional because that'll make her/ them think that you will always respond to games. Id send an extremely short text telling them to "chill out with the immature games, because it's repulsive."... Or, don't respond at all!

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Posted

hey man, thanks for the respons!

I haven't replied to it, I've just deleted the message straight away. Im so sick and tired of her playing games. "But I need time..." stuff like that... So immature right? And I deserve way better?

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Posted

Anybody? :(

Posted

If she is having seconds thoughts and is serious about it she will contact you instead of getting her friend to do so. Just stay quiet, in my opinion if someone really wants you or to talk to you they will do it themselves...this thing with her friend seems half arsed.

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Posted

Should I also block all of her family/mutual friends on facebook?

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Posted

Even though me and the rest of her family got on well? And mutual friends. We got on really well... But still. I guess i should block them as well?

Posted

Yeah, son. Block all them em effers. It'll feel goooood.

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Posted

hahahaha. Sorted! :)

Posted

Don't block them. It looks childish. And you guys might still come back. How will you feel then after having blocked them? Wait a little, I'd say.

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Posted
Don't block them. It looks childish. And you guys might still come back. How will you feel then after having blocked them? Wait a little, I'd say.

 

Have you read my story?

Posted
Don't block them. It looks childish. And you guys might still come back. How will you feel then after having blocked them? Wait a little, I'd say.
Don't listen to edgy. Who cares how it looks? Blocking helps YOU. You don't need to worry about what a bunch of people who DO NOT CARE about you, think of you.

 

Do any- and everything in your power to help you move on, provided it doesn't physically hurt anyone!

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Posted
Should I just keep on with my NC? Things are going good.
Read, re-read, and tattoo on your forehead.
Posted

Definitely block her, you don't need to see what's going on with her but don't go outta your way for her family, unless they've done you wrong, but y'know, do what you want. Who cares how it looks, not like your going back there is it?

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Posted

her family and mutual friends are blocked on facebook. :)

What she did to me was wrong in so many ways. Now it's all about ME, ME and... ME.

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