seixal Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I had a coworker who was "testing the waters", when I was at a low point in my marriage. Even though there was testing the waters of both sides, if we actually followed through on anything, it still would have been dramatic all around. He wasn't married, but he was living with his girlfriend and his two infants...while I was married. It would have been a mistake to act on anything as it would have presented more problems than benefits. It would have just created a crap-ton of problems and often times people will not leave their current partner or spouse for the person they are cheating with. Bad idea all around. Looking back, I realized if I had acted on a silly impulse, I probably would have ruined my marriage. It has been two years since then and I still feel awkward when I talk to him about casual semantics. So as I said...bad idea. Do you think it is better to stay in an unhappy marriage rather than trying to purse happiness else where? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Morro72 Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Do you think it is better to stay in an unhappy marriage rather than trying to purse happiness else where? Those aren't the alternatives. When my wife and I are unhappy with some aspect of our marriage we generally work on fixing the marriage or fixing ourselves. Maybe we'd be better off pursuing happiness elsewhere, but to be perfectly honest that just seems like a lot of unnecessary effort that neither of us has the time for. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author londonguy007 Posted August 10, 2015 Author Share Posted August 10, 2015 Thanks for the advice. I think to many of you have hit the wrong end of the stick. 1. She is not a coworker. But someone who comes into the workplace twice a week. 2. She is a shy girl who is not a physically tactile person. So I have interpreted her touching gestures as showing interest. 3. I am only a temp worker so it doesn't bother me if u loose my job. (Which I won't ) 4. I'm not interested in a relationship with her but just a bit of fun. Maybe thats all she wants too. Link to post Share on other sites
pink_sugar Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Those aren't the alternatives. When my wife and I are unhappy with some aspect of our marriage we generally work on fixing the marriage or fixing ourselves. Maybe we'd be better off pursuing happiness elsewhere, but to be perfectly honest that just seems like a lot of unnecessary effort that neither of us has the time for. I think it was more about the financial strain we were dealing with at the time that was putting a lot of stress on the marriage. I thought my husband was the reason for that strain, because we couldn't make ends meet. The job market in the area we lived in before was very tight and very competitive. He was depressed and unmotivated to find work as a result of the difficulties finding a decent job. Once we moved from that area, he found a decent paying full time job right away. Since then, things have vastly improved and without the financial strain taking a toll, we were able to find each other again. The temptation that once existed is now gone. The key is to really dive into your issues and fix them...sometimes things might make you lose sight of why you're with someone. You start focusing on all the negative about a person. If you jump into another relationship so quickly, those problems might reappear down the road. Link to post Share on other sites
pink_sugar Posted August 10, 2015 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Thanks for the advice. I think to many of you have hit the wrong end of the stick. 1. She is not a coworker. But someone who comes into the workplace twice a week. 2. She is a shy girl who is not a physically tactile person. So I have interpreted her touching gestures as showing interest. 3. I am only a temp worker so it doesn't bother me if u loose my job. (Which I won 't ) 4. I'm not interested in a relationship with her but just a bit of fun. Maybe thats all she wants too. But the name of the thread says "coworker"? Link to post Share on other sites
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