smackie9 Posted September 6, 2015 Share Posted September 6, 2015 Well OP has she moved down? or did you call it off? Link to post Share on other sites
aliveagain Posted September 6, 2015 Share Posted September 6, 2015 Friend, if they cheat on you in the beginning of your relationship, guess what you can expect for the rest of it? You have all the truth you need, another man was in her bed 4 nights in a row while in a relationship with you. If it was innocent why didn't she tell you about it, why didn't she ask your permission first? If you choose to believe nothing happened, well what can I say? When two grownups climb under the sheets together touching bodies all night I doubt nothing happened. The fact they took pictures of the event shows just how little respect she has for you. She is poor girlfriend material. Link to post Share on other sites
dignifiedgirl Posted September 8, 2015 Share Posted September 8, 2015 Usual cheating GF response. Only admit to what you can prove. So she did not admit to all the sex. To get the truth schedule a polygraph test then tell her she has to take it. Then after you found out she cheated dump her. Usual human cheating reply. OP, hope you are doing better. In the future be very wary of LDRs. I have been living with with my now ex fiance and started off as LDR for a long while. I have sneaking suspicion that LDRs can be a haven for cheating types. Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 Usual human cheating reply. OP, hope you are doing better. In the future be very wary of LDRs. I have been living with with my now ex fiance and started off as LDR for a long while. I have sneaking suspicion that LDRs can be a haven for cheating types. Good luck to you. Do not change my posts when you quote them. You want to do a partial quote that is ok. You want to disagree, ok. Debate, ok. This thread is about cheating GF's. The OP was not cheated on by humans. If the OP was female then it would of been usual cheating BF response. Link to post Share on other sites
giblesp Posted September 10, 2015 Share Posted September 10, 2015 Sorry for the long post. Written on my phone. I found out last week that my SO cheated on me. We have been committed for five months and are in a LDR (3hours). A couple of weeks ago she told me she had not been been feeling well. That she felt we lost some of the communication in our relationship. Well last week I felt something was off I snooped on her phone and found some strange looking messages. Things that she didn't tell me about. Not feeling well from drinking and other trivial information. I didn't say anything and went about my day. The next day I decided to look again and went into her photo album. I found two deleted pictures of another guy laying in her bed from two different days. I woke her up and asked here if here was anything she wanted to tell me a couple of times. She did not come clean. When confronted with actual information she actually came clean. We have gone over almost all of the details. How he spent the night four consecutive nights. How they went for breakfast one of the mornings. We have gone over most of the details and how much interaction there was. She says they never kissed and didn't have sex. I have asked her all the questions I can think of and she has answered everything. She revealed this was someone she kissed in the past. After looking further I also found out that one of the guys she frequently goes out with has feelings for her. I don't think she has any towards him but when we talked about that she brushed it off and said that he was drunk when he confessed his love. That there is no way he could love her. After talking about it some more she admitted to just ignoring the truth and that it was inappropriate. I have felt like **** listening to all the details. She has gone no contact but I don't think she told him not to contact her. I always tried to not be the jealous type but I have now asked she does not go out with any male friends alone. We have an open phone and social media policy, something which I also offered to her since it was one of my request. I'm trying to figure out what else to ask for. Should I try to talk to the other guy? Should I ask her not to delete any messages that he sends her. Do I ask her to notify me anytime a guy ask her out. It's been almost a week and I'm starting to feel better. She has talked with me everything I need to talk. She has given me an answer for all my questions. I still feel like **** and have moments of pure sadness. I have cried myself to sleep too many nights but she has been there to hold me. I tried very hard to give her everything she wanted. I have taken her to a few shows she has really wanted to see. Last night we went to a show with a bunch of my friends. We got really close to the stage and had a great time. Towards the end of the show I just thought about how hard I have worked to make her happy. In that moment she was having the time of her life. Then I was filled with rage. I felt so used, I felt angry. I actually left Her there and went to my car to have a smoke. I texted her that I would wait for her at the car. She found me when she got out and held my hand as we walked towards the car. I didn't say a word to her for the rest of the night. I try not to direct any anger at her but it's there. I can't help it. I just hide it well. I haven't told anyone. I don't know that I want to. I don't want people judging her and out relationship. She sleeps with another man(without anything happening of course!), and now holds you while you cry??!!! WTF!!!! Don't go crying to girls about stuff like this, they will see you as weak and needy. They will go into a mothering role and not view you as a sexual man. Eventually, they will find their way into the arms if another man, which she's already been doing anyway. Decide on a course of action and take it. Go and cry over a beer with your friends, that's what they are there for. You've only been seeing her for a short time, way too soon to commit emotionally. You now see what she's like, do you want a GF that sleeps with another man? If the answer is no, you know what to do. Link to post Share on other sites
casa2015 Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 m.snow.... you're good... best option for sure Link to post Share on other sites
dragon_fly_7 Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 Dump her by now. It's very unlikely that they did nothing within those 4 consecutive days. Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 The OP hasn't been back to this thread since he started it back in the beginning of August. Link to post Share on other sites
Tobin Posted September 17, 2015 Share Posted September 17, 2015 He was given almost unanimous advice to dump her. He's determined to make this work, he's in almost complete denial and has no idea how to go about dealing with his cheating girlfriend, and he's headed towards disaster but doesn't want to be told anything other than "everything will be fine once she moves close to you". Of course he's not going to come back. This is why therapists tend to be so gentle and cautious with their patients. I they told them what they really needed to hear, not only would it bounce off but the patients wouldn't come back for more sessions and they'd be out of business. Link to post Share on other sites
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