Got a text after 1 week No Contact…What do I do?

[Chi townD]

Why talk to her? For closure? Dude, you should have had closure when the relationship ended. If you meet up to talk then all you're going to hear is what YOU did wrong or what YOU didn't do that caused the demise of the relationship and all of this was your fault that made her force her hand. But "I hope we can still be friends!"

 

 

Not worth your time, dude.

[bada bing]

Why talk to her? For closure? Dude, you should have had closure when the relationship ended. If you meet up to talk then all you're going to hear is what YOU did wrong or what YOU didn't do that caused the demise of the relationship and all of this was your fault that made her force her hand. But "I hope we can still be friends!"

 

 

Not worth your time, dude.

 

Your right, I would hate the "we could be friends speech"…I guess she has ignored me as much as I have ignored her, and I extended the olive branch by asking her to talk and she said "no need too"…

 

See, this is why I need the board and your input to slap me around a bit

[lolablue17]

I ask because I don't even trust my own judgement now being so emotionally confused.

 

Well, there two advises you got.

1. forget about her, don't contact her.

2. Call her.

 

I think the first advise is yesterday's advice. You've tried that. It didn't work out for you and now you're caught in a twilight zone which you find it hard to really move on. So, this advise doesn't relly help now. it's useless.

 

If you call her you're not going to beg. You're gonna say -

 

"Hi baby, I'm sorry but I'm not good at mind games, and I don't understand hints, so let's clear the situation. Did you break up with me? yes Or No. I think that you did, but I want to hear it from you directly".

 

If you talk like that you make an impression of a man who doesn't like BS! It's OK, she won't think you're needy or weak.

[aloneinaz]

What you think?

 

Remember we never actually broke up.

 

What do I think? I think you need to take charge of this situation. She's obviously not into you anymore and feels you've broken up. How do you not communicate, return calls or text and still feel you could be in a relationship with this person?

 

I'm really perplexed on why you'd even consider wanting to continue with this train wreck, drama queen? There's MILLIONS of normal women out there who want a normal, healthy, drama free relationship. Your time would be so better spent on ignoring this one, blocking her on social media so you don't view her @hit she's posting and moving on..

[kismetkismet]

don't put anything on social media. that's silly. But I feel like you should find out whether or not the two of you are broken up! that will give you some closure.. and then stop communicating with her.. none of these confusing little toe in the water things, you know? It's easier to move on when you really just take the plunge and break free.

[bada bing]

I just saw that this posted this 2 days ago…I know, I need to stop looking at her page…but this was interesting…She posts things for me to see, she used to do this a lot with romantic quotes…What do you think about this quote she posted?

 

"All romantic relationships need a bit of madness at times, a bit of commotion, a spark that reminds us that the passion is not dead and the game is not over".

 

It was from a relationship/life coach guru she quoted.

[quattrob]

Honestly don't know why you want to analyze her stuff. It doesn't matter get it into your head. And how is it interesting? All i see is she's got you to do exactly what she wants, which is care and get your attention. Stop caring and stop checking her stuff.

[aloneinaz]

I just saw that this posted this 2 days ago…I know, I need to stop looking at her page…

 

 

"Insanity, doing the same things the same way and expecting a different outcome"...

[Satu]

Just a gentle reminder:

 

*No direct contact in either direction. No sending or receiving of messages. No replies. Block any means she might use to contact you.

*No indirect contact through third parties.

*De-friend or delete from all social media. No monitoring of her on social media.

*No 'little birds' feeding you news.

*Tell people that you don't want to know anything about what she is doing or saying.

 

Take care.

[soulforge2013]

"thanks for answering…we don't need to talk…I just wanted to know that you were doing good, thats all"

 

 

dude she clearly said "we don't need to talk"

 

does this sound like somebody who is dying to sort things out with you?

 

 

ok so you both had an argument.. but when all communication stops, and the other person is making no effort to resolve the matter, because of there arrogance and stubbornness, then why keep reaching out to them?

 

walk away from this... complete an utter no contact.. drop all social media related to her.. stop reading into her silly quotes!

 

one day you may get a message from her, clearly wanting to talk?

 

but this will only happen if you go complete no contact.. do you really want to be with a woman who drops all communication with you, over every little disagreement..

 

i am in the same situation as you.. i had to cut her out of my life

[aloneinaz]

Just a gentle reminder:

 

*No direct contact in either direction. No sending or receiving of messages. No replies. Block any means she might use to contact you.

*No indirect contact through third parties.

*De-friend or delete from all social media. No monitoring of her on social media.

*No 'little birds' feeding you news.

*Tell people that you don't want to know anything about what she is doing or saying.

 

Take care.

 

You can lead a thirsty horse to water but...

[Lizrd3000]

I just saw that this posted this 2 days ago…I know, I need to stop looking at her page…but this was interesting…She posts things for me to see, she used to do this a lot with romantic quotes…What do you think about this quote she posted?

 

"All romantic relationships need a bit of madness at times, a bit of commotion, a spark that reminds us that the passion is not dead and the game is not over".

 

It was from a relationship/life coach guru she quoted.

Unless she directly contacts you and begs you to come back, EVERYTHING she says is NOT worth listening to. Especially **** quotes she posts on Facebook.

 

 

Why are you so sure it's meant for you? Maybe it's about someone else she likes.

 

 

Also, she's probably just trying to get a reaction out of you.

If she finds out you're stalking her on Facebook, read her posts and you get in contact with her, do you even realize how big of a ego-boost that'll give her? And that's ALL she's thinking about right now. She doesn't want you (at this point atleast), she wants you to acknowledge her.

BUT DON'T DO IT, DON'T BE A BITCH PLS.

[aloneinaz]

Unless she directly contacts you and begs you to come back, EVERYTHING she says is NOT worth listening to. Especially **** quotes she posts on Facebook.

 

 

Why are you so sure it's meant for you? Maybe it's about someone else she likes.

 

 

Also, she's probably just trying to get a reaction out of you.

If she finds out you're stalking her on Facebook, read her posts and you get in contact with her, do you even realize how big of a ego-boost that'll give her? And that's ALL she's thinking about right now. She doesn't want you (at this point atleast), she wants you to acknowledge her.

BUT DON'T DO IT, DON'T BE A BITCH PLS.

 

Nicely stated..

[bada bing]

You guys are right…I just had a weak moment.

 

I've asked to talk twice and she has not accepted. Actually said "its ok we don't need to talk"…that quite rude and immature to be honest.

 

It will just feed her ego…why won't she just leave me alone and let me move on.

[NoLeafClover]

She is an amature..She is posting tweets and other social media...man thats some old crap now. Thats 2012 stuff. Thats like exs calling restricted right after a break up but dont say anything on the phone.

I guess thats what you get when dating a 'basic' chick.

You need to upgrade by removing this basic crap out of your life. You become who you hangout with. The more you dwell the more you involve yourself with crazy.

 

Listen to people here...ignore, forget, move on.

[seminoles84]

Everyone is spot on so far. She's being immature and playing games. You need to go dark and work on yourself. Sounds like you guys are pretty young? Don't keep feeding her ego by being available.. Especially after the last text. Come on man you deserve better. Can't say this enough.. You've got to detox yourself from this relationship. You do that by NC. It'll suck bad at first but it will be worth it.

[eleve82]

Without much back story I'm just going to give you an alternate view based on what was in this post

 

 

You said that the two of you are good communicators. Well I'm sorry but your thread doesn't suggest that- going NC for more than a day or two is passive aggressive and a power play to see who caves on first and frankly I dont see how this is "good communication'. Its neither soley her fault nor yours but both of yours since you both persisted in texting and playing silly games "holding back". A more mature way to deal with this graciously is to call to talk instead of baiting for responses with a "maybe we should talk". Are you really surprised that she is responding like this when you make it clear that you are okay not talking to her for this long? can you honestly say this situation wasn't also your fault? Instead of saying "lets talk after we have both cooled down" you willingly let things sink into ambiguity and now your pride hurts more than your desire to reconcile because she sent you a text telling you it was unnecessary to talk. I'm not sure how much you both truly move each enough to look past your egos. All this pettiness about who blocked who on what or reading or posting 'hidden messages' into Facebook pages is so incredibly meaningless.

 

 

So instead of bashing her for her "heartless" comment about how she didn't beg you to talk, maybe you should just pick up the phone and call her. She telling you that she just wanted to know you were okay is in fact telling you she cares about your wellbeing and her telling you she wished you two could truly understand each other means she probably thinks you two don't appear to be on the same page - it doesn't take a genius to figure out that more NC and you ignoring this text made things worse. any one on this receiving end would also be hurt.

 

 

But frankly if you can go a whole week deliberately holding back from calling her just to prove she is in the 'wrong' or whatever you thought it signified then you might as well just let this die forever. Long term relationships take maturity, patience and nurturing - and you need to be honest about how much of that you have demonstrated.