Never ends

[Cali408]

My take, tinder and other OLD have given people complete ADHD. Too many choices.

 

It's like tie shopping your bedazzled by all the colors. Or watching porn. There was once a time, you got the video and had to deal with all the scenes. Now, you have it online and there are too many choices.

 

I had a really good friend who I used to inappropriately speak with too much. I noticed once she went OLD, how she changed in our relationship. Too many choices, too much noise, less attention. It's for the best, but I understand it if you're an attractive woman. I didn't want to be in the emotional harem anymore

[Male]

Male

 

You could have just made a complete pillock of yourself in front of one of the good ones.

 

 

I could absolutely care less. They arent good ones in my world.

[toolforgrowth]

I could absolutely care less. They arent good ones in my world.

 

If you don't care, then why are you here posting about it? Your portrayed nonchalance doesn't match the anger and passion behind your words. You clearly care...a lot.

 

Okay, they aren't good ones in your world. Fine. Great. You can always just leave it at that.

 

You get far too emotionally involved in your OLD activities. I think it would do you a world of good to get out from behind your computer screen and meet women in the real world. But since you have basically stated that you essentially already have all the answers, I'm sure you'll disregard that advice (like you have with all the other advice you've been given here) and just keep banging your head against that same wall, each time expecting different results. No skin off my back...it's your head after all.

[Gwwm123]

Another day, another woman that crosses my path thinking I'm the typical idiot that will put up with her inconsiderate behavior.

 

Got a match on Tinder the other day with a very nice looking woman. So I sent her a nice casual greeting. A day goes by and nothing. Typically this isnt a big deal, and I dont jump the gun. But during that time the app clearly showed that she had been on at least 3 separate occasions that I saw. So being the no nonsense type of guy I send her a message telling her...

 

"Thanks for clicking on my pic, then ignoring me".

 

Of course now she replies(funny how that always gets them to reply, but a nice hello, how are you gets ignored). She states shes "been busy" with work.

 

Now I understand theres no set in stone rules saying that a person needs to reply within X amount of time. And no rules saying they have to reply to a message the next time they visit the app. But in my mind, if youre going to "click" on a persons profile, and you get a match with them, why in the hell would you visit the app at least 3 times without taking the time to reply to a message the person sent you?? THATS the whole reason you signed up, to get matches, talk, and meet. But if you have time to visit the app, then you sure as hell have time to take 5 secs and reply to someone that sent you a message. Someone that you clicked on to begin with! Its not like its a dating site, and I am messaging random women, not knowing at all if they are interested. She made a conscious decision to click specifically on my profile in hopes that we were a match.

 

So in response to her "been busy at work" comment, I replied with the following:

 

** Total Bull****. You must not realize that it shows on your profile every time that you use the app. You've been on here multiple times since I sent that message. You made a choice not to respond. You could have taken 5 secs and replied "Hi xxxxxx, really busy at work, but I'll hit you up soon"! But women like you dont have manners like that nowadays. You just expect that guys will hang around no matter what, and put up with your inconsiderate behavior. It's called common courtesy...something a lot of people dont know anything about anymore. **

 

Now I'm sure many of you are thinking "geez, with that attitude you do you really think a woman will want to date you"? Women that deserve respect get my respect. Women that act like that, I will always give them a piece of my mind. And if women out there have guys do it to them, they should make it a point to read them the riot act as well. Too many people in our society just let things go by the wayside, without holding people accountable for their actions. And in the dating world, theres way too much of it.

 

I do think you are putting to much thought into Tinder. Realize women are constantly being barraged with messages, be it on Tinder or a dating website and they will promptly ignore you unless you are overwhelmingly good looking.

 

My advice, don't Tinder, don't date online if you cannot handle the rejection because you will be ignored many many many times or probably always.

[GravityMan]

Male, you are taking dating as a whole (especially Tinder/OLD) way too seriously and way too personally. That's probably a big reason why you aren't having more success. Lighten the heck up, bro. Stop over-thinking this stuff.

 

People tend to be more attractive to others when they have a positive and fun attitude, don't get overly sensitive about petty things, and don't blow things out of proportion.

 

So the lady wasn't interested. It doesn't matter why, or how she communicated her disinterest (which can include ceasing to respond to your messages or giving some excuse, hoping you'll get the hint). Just accept that she wasn't interested, get over it and move on. And learn to recognize and take a hint...it's not that hard.

 

Even among mature confident adults that have strong social skills, communication is often nonverbal, figurative, indirect and/or subtle. That's life, and it can be a fun/good thing sometimes, and it's an important life skill to have when interacting with people.

[Male]

If you don't care, then why are you here posting about it?

 

I dont care if I scare women away.

 

I do care about how women have a nonchalant "I'll get around to messaging you when I feel like it" type attitude. The reason women act that way is because spineless men let them. Men usually want sex, so they typically put up with a lot of bs when it comes to social interactions with women. Which in turn feeds the flames even more, teaching women that they can set their standards higher and higher, and act however they want, because if the guy doesnt like it, women know they have other options. And this whole social media/smartphone/internet age is just making it worse and worse.

 

Lets compare the Tinder situation to a time before there was internet, before cell phones, back when we had to actually call a woman on the phone. In my mind, clicking "Like" on my profile, and matching with me is really no different than a woman giving me her number back in the day. By her "liking" my profile, that unlocked the messaging feature. That is a clear conscious decision on her part that she was aware of. A decision that she knew very well would elicit a message from me. The same as giving me her number 20 years ago. She expects me to call. But instead I sent a message using the app since we dont have each others number. If I presented my side of it to an "unbiased group of people that arent hell bent on instilling the unwritten rules of dating" I think I would win my case very easily.

[minimariah]

The reason women act that way is because spineless men let them.

 

the reason women act that way is because THEY CAN and because they are FREE to do so - not because MEN allowed them to act a certain way.

 

women can do and act however they want -- they don't need men to allow them anything, understand?

 

Lets compare the Tinder situation to a time before there was internet, before cell phones, back when we had to actually call a woman on the phone. In my mind, clicking "Like" on my profile, and matching with me is really no different than a woman giving me her number back in the day. By her "liking" my profile, that unlocked the messaging feature. That is a clear conscious decision on her part that she was aware of.

 

is she not allowed to change her mind in the process...? i really don't understand what the problem is.

 

she can "like" you and give you her number and CHANGE HER MIND in the meantime -- she does not owe you absolutely anything.

 

If I presented my side of it to an "unbiased group of people that arent hell bent on instilling the unwritten rules of dating" I think I would win my case very easily.

 

it's not about unwritten rules of dating - it is about your disturbing behavior and harrassment, abuse of another woman because she chose NOT to text you back.

 

i'm almost afraid to think about what you'll do when someone decides to dump or divorce you if THIS is how you act when women don't continue getting to know you. you're a perfect example of a male privilege and everything that comes with it. get help before we read about you in the news, okay?

[Price2Play]

Oh my the butthurt is this thread is amazing, over a hook-up app none the less. AFC to the core.

[Male]

the reason women act that way is because THEY CAN and because they are FREE to do so - not because MEN allowed them to act a certain way.

 

women can do and act however they want -- they don't need men to allow them anything, understand?

 

 

I totally understand that. Its their choice.

 

What I'm getting at is the fact that many women nowadays are changing their behavior (consciously and subconsciously) because with all the social media, dating sites, and dating apps, its significantly broadens the pool of men to pick from. When women start getting more and more attention, their standards, their attitudes, and their manners change.

 

Its no different than how a very attractive person grows up learning that the world treats them different because they look good vs a person that grows up less attractive and has to refine their personality to garner they same attention.

 

In pass 10 yrs or less, I think I see a huge change in how women act. Its not that they are becoming independent and strong, its more so that they are becoming stuck up, and *******s, because they know there will always be another guy around the corner that will put up with it.

[toolforgrowth]

I totally understand that. Its their choice.

 

What I'm getting at is the fact that many women nowadays are changing their behavior (consciously and subconsciously) because with all the social media, dating sites, and dating apps, its significantly broadens the pool of men to pick from. When women start getting more and more attention, their standards, their attitudes, and their manners change.

 

 

To an extent, I agree with this. The dating pool for women has definitely broadened. Basically any guy with an internet connection is a potential date. The thing is, I tend to view OLD as the cesspool of dating material for both genders. The best choice you can make would be to drop OLD all together and meet women in the real world. That's truly where I had the most luck.

 

Its no different than how a very attractive person grows up learning that the world treats them different because they look good vs a person that grows up less attractive and has to refine their personality to garner they same attention.

 

 

That applies with both genders. Not every woman is hot. In fact, some of them are downright hideous.

 

In pass 10 yrs or less, I think I see a huge change in how women act. Its not that they are becoming independent and strong, its more so that they are becoming stuck up, and *******s, because they know there will always be another guy around the corner that will put up with it.

 

 

I definitely agree that there's a degree of truth to this. However, you've become so sensitive to it that you overreact to anything a woman might do. Kinda like how the radfems get so worked up over every little thing.

 

 

Bro, I don't always answer my text messages, and that's with people I actually like. You're getting way too worked up with this. Frankly, you're giving her all your power, dude. There's a time and a place to stand up for men's rights. Tinder etiquette ain't one of 'em.

[calvincline47]

Another day, another woman that crosses my path thinking I'm the typical idiot that will put up with her inconsiderate behavior.

 

Got a match on Tinder the other day with a very nice looking woman. So I sent her a nice casual greeting. A day goes by and nothing. Typically this isnt a big deal, and I dont jump the gun. But during that time the app clearly showed that she had been on at least 3 separate occasions that I saw. So being the no nonsense type of guy I send her a message telling her...

 

"Thanks for clicking on my pic, then ignoring me".

 

Of course now she replies(funny how that always gets them to reply, but a nice hello, how are you gets ignored). She states shes "been busy" with work.

 

Now I understand theres no set in stone rules saying that a person needs to reply within X amount of time. And no rules saying they have to reply to a message the next time they visit the app. But in my mind, if youre going to "click" on a persons profile, and you get a match with them, why in the hell would you visit the app at least 3 times without taking the time to reply to a message the person sent you?? THATS the whole reason you signed up, to get matches, talk, and meet. But if you have time to visit the app, then you sure as hell have time to take 5 secs and reply to someone that sent you a message. Someone that you clicked on to begin with! Its not like its a dating site, and I am messaging random women, not knowing at all if they are interested. She made a conscious decision to click specifically on my profile in hopes that we were a match.

 

So in response to her "been busy at work" comment, I replied with the following:

 

** Total Bull****. You must not realize that it shows on your profile every time that you use the app. You've been on here multiple times since I sent that message. You made a choice not to respond. You could have taken 5 secs and replied "Hi xxxxxx, really busy at work, but I'll hit you up soon"! But women like you dont have manners like that nowadays. You just expect that guys will hang around no matter what, and put up with your inconsiderate behavior. It's called common courtesy...something a lot of people dont know anything about anymore. **

 

Now I'm sure many of you are thinking "geez, with that attitude you do you really think a woman will want to date you"? Women that deserve respect get my respect. Women that act like that, I will always give them a piece of my mind. And if women out there have guys do it to them, they should make it a point to read them the riot act as well. Too many people in our society just let things go by the wayside, without holding people accountable for their actions. And in the dating world, theres way too much of it.

 

Online dating is NOT a good place to be if you are of average or below average looks as a man.

 

OLD is basically a catalog for women to find their prince charming (and most do very easily).

 

There's no point in complaining about it on here. Women do not understand the struggles of men....and it's pointless to try to explain this to them.

[almond]

You hate women too much to date them - it's just not going to work.

 

I suggest you try men, or just get yourself a dog and call it a day.

[autumnnight]

You need therapy, and you do not need to be dating.

[Male]

You need therapy, and you do not need to be dating.

 

I would probably annoy/argue with the therapist too much and get kicked out

[compulsivedancer]

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/03/style/women-turn-tables-on-online-harassers.html?WT.mc_id=2015-MAY-KWP-AUD_DEV-0501-0531&WT.mc_ev=click&ad-keywords=MAYAUDDEVFB&kwp_0=15735&kwp_4=101162&kwp_1=141788&_r=0

[mrs rubble]

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/03/style/women-turn-tables-on-online-harassers.html?WT.mc_id=2015-MAY-KWP-AUD_DEV-0501-0531&WT.mc_ev=click&ad-keywords=MAYAUDDEVFB&kwp_0=15735&kwp_4=101162&kwp_1=141788&_r=0

Lol!!!

Watch out male!!

[Toodaloo]

I could absolutely care less. They arent good ones in my world.

 

Well stop looking then. No point if they are all crass bitches...

 

Just saying!

 

I have been trying on line dating for a while now and to be blunt I have learnt that I need to take breaks. Its hard work, draining...

 

I am going back to real life and the people around me.

[elaine567]

Had this exchange happened IRL, with a real life exchange say at a supermarket, I guess that woman would have called the police on "Male".

One thing for her to express an interest with a smile say, and quite another for it to turn into a shouting match, when she wasn't showing as much interest, as he wanted.