Mrin Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 Why not have a real and genuine conversation with him on Thursday? This is starting to seem like a sit com. Have a real conversation. Don't fess up to fake profile. But talk about what is going through his head, what is going through yours and what you both want and what that means. Stop playing games. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Bohonia Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 He is still on the dating site looking for options and possibly entertainment. He may simply be one of those people who can't be single. The fact he is mentioning relationships, how your life could have been if he met you sooner is a red flag to me. You two barely know each other. Give him a chance if you wish but no need for the spit for spat stuff either you are into him or you're not. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Yookie Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 Update: he ignored me personally all day, and as of 1 am, he emailed the fake profile and said he decided not to meet her. Ironically, my personal dating site profile expired and is "unavailable" now, if he were looking for it. What do you think he's going to do? As an analyst, it's almost fun to try and figure this out. Perhaps that's why I attract these types of people. Other than make a fake profile (because I doubted him), did I do anything to cause this? I trusted and focused on him until I had a reason not to. I'm going to continue ignoring him. The problem is that we know many of the same people. Any thoughts on how to handle that so it isn't awkward or ruin my chances with someone better? Yes you trusted a guy who couldn't even be honest with his age from jump. Don't ignore early warning signs. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SunnySide0418 Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 He just told my fake profile that he's been dating one girl exclusively and he thinks he is starting to fall for her. I guess that is me. What do you think? I've ignored him for over a day and had a date last night with someone else. Who thinks I should have the conversation in person and who thinks this could be a misunderstanding? Why didn't you then ask (with your fake profile) if he is falling for someone why he is still on the site? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PumpkinLumpkin Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 OMG this is better than an episode of Friends!!! I'm rating this high. What happened??? I"m dying to know! I don't think he knows it's you!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
wizer Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 Why did you go on a date with some one else if you agreed to be exclusive with him? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author venusinlibra Posted April 21, 2015 Author Share Posted April 21, 2015 OMG this is better than an episode of Friends!!! I'm rating this high. What happened??? I"m dying to know! I don't think he knows it's you!! Lol, glad this can provide some entertainment. He told the fake profile he couldn't meet her, is on the dating site all day, then texts me using my first name and saying he's been missing me and stayed off of the site. I ignore him for a few hours before texting, and he replied one minute later that his week is going to get better as it goes on because he'll be closer to Friday when he gets to see me. I joked that he went missing on me and he said he wasn't trying to and asked me out for thursday, the day he cancelled with the fake profile. I told him I might have to go out of town (5 hours away) and he invited himself to go with me and said he'd take off of work. We chatted and he says he loves spending time with me and I replied "same here", then he's ignored me for five hours, but on the dating site for the past three hours. Lol. I still think I should dump him in person. But I actually started feeling bad for him and wondering if he is trying. I'm just too nice, I guess, but when someone does get on my bad side, they are there for life. What do you think? Link to post Share on other sites
PumpkinLumpkin Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 Lol, glad this can provide some entertainment. He told the fake profile he couldn't meet her, is on the dating site all day, then texts me using my first name and saying he's been missing me and stayed off of the site. I ignore him for a few hours before texting, and he replied one minute later that his week is going to get better as it goes on because he'll be closer to Friday when he gets to see me. I joked that he went missing on me and he said he wasn't trying to and asked me out for thursday, the day he cancelled with the fake profile. I told him I might have to go out of town (5 hours away) and he invited himself to go with me and said he'd take off of work. We chatted and he says he loves spending time with me and I replied "same here", then he's ignored me for five hours, but on the dating site for the past three hours. Lol. I still think I should dump him in person. But I actually started feeling bad for him and wondering if he is trying. I'm just too nice, I guess, but when someone does get on my bad side, they are there for life. What do you think? Sometimes I think those dating sites are faulty with how long the person has been logged on. I think you shouldn't take down your real profile until he does. Link to post Share on other sites
joseb Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 IF you really want this to turn into a full blown soap opera, you could always arrange to meet him using your fake profile, and then throw a drink in his face in an expensive restaurant, complete with a friend videoing it. You might make some money on you tube too 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author venusinlibra Posted April 21, 2015 Author Share Posted April 21, 2015 Lol, I wouldn't want to become famous for this, but it's a funny idea. All of this started because He wanted to be exclusive and agreed that we shouldn't see others from dating sites. My membership expired, and I need a vacation from dating after this. He is still on the site, though not logging in as often. Once he thought he had me reeled back in yesterday, he went silent, dropping off in mid conversation. I guarantee he will be popping up with one of these "been thinking about you" texts. Thoughts? I still think I need to dump him in person, and that's what I'm waiting for. Can anyone give advice on this? Is there any reason to do it in person? And for future reference, how many dates is enough to expect that we both get off of the dating site? Should I wait until the mam brings up the exclusive conversation first? I was thinking five dates should be my rule, and if he's not ready to be exclusive or get off of the site, then he goes. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Gary S Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 I would refer you back to post 10. If you reject him to his face, you don't know him, he might try to reject you back, or rip your head off. Link to post Share on other sites
DrReplyInRhymes Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 Seems to me like you're also playing games, Creating fake profile for deception along with fake names? You keep excusing yourself as well, justifying it too, Ever consider he found that it was really just you? Don't get me wrong, this guys isn't a prize, Obviously you think you're not the only woman in his eyes, Yet, he cancelled a date after asking to be exclusive with you, And yet, you're the one out on a date with another dude? This is just another reason why online dating seems to be rough, When attention validation is euphoric, and you can't seem to get enough. It seems you put all the blame on him so you don't feel guilty on the other date, because in your own words, he caused you to do all this, but I simply can't relate. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
confusedmandi Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 I swear I think I've dated this guy lol. Or at least his type. They really don't want to be exclusive. They crave the attention of multiple females Once he thinks he has u where he wants u.. Interested.. He pulls away and works on getting other women interested. It's like a game and he pours it on thick and then seems distant and it makes no sense and will drive u crazy. Guaranteed he is doing this with more than just u. When he thinks some other guy is catching ur eye he steps up his game to win u back. It's all about the chase. Cut him loose because he will hurt u. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
wizer Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 Yeah so many games with the fake profiles and all the deception. If you need to go to all that trouble to check up on someone, it's hardly worth it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author venusinlibra Posted April 22, 2015 Author Share Posted April 22, 2015 I ended it. I called and he didn't answer, but he called me back quickly. I tried being nice and set up to meet tomorrow, then I couldn't take it. He said he wants to go out of townowhere with me and I replied that I did not want him to go. I told him I was born at night, not last night. I said that I had a bad feeling from the beginning but wanted to give him a chance. I got him to confirm that we agreed to be exclusive and not talk to others on the dating site. I said a little bird told me that he has been on the dating site. I told him that no other guy had done something like that to me and I consider it cheating. He said he didn't know we weren't allowed to log on. Then I asked why even log on when in a relationship because you can Google pics and buy adult magazines. He said he didn't meet anyone else off of there. He tried every way to justify it, and I said that no other guy would do this because it doesn't get any better than me, and said I'm sure he wouldn't like his daughters being treated like he did me. I told him I know he lied about his age, I don't deserve this, and I'm done and I hung up. Less than five minutes. I already feel better but now have twinges of guilt about if I did the right thing. Did I? Could I have handled it better? He is already back on the dating site, lol. Do you think he is going to come crawling back? If so, how should I handle it? Link to post Share on other sites
SunnySide0418 Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I ended it. I called and he didn't answer, but he called me back quickly. I tried being nice and set up to meet tomorrow, then I couldn't take it. He said he wants to go out of townowhere with me and I replied that I did not want him to go. I told him I was born at night, not last night. I said that I had a bad feeling from the beginning but wanted to give him a chance. I got him to confirm that we agreed to be exclusive and not talk to others on the dating site. I said a little bird told me that he has been on the dating site. I told him that no other guy had done something like that to me and I consider it cheating. He said he didn't know we weren't allowed to log on. Then I asked why even log on when in a relationship because you can Google pics and buy adult magazines. He said he didn't meet anyone else off of there. He tried every way to justify it, and I said that no other guy would do this because it doesn't get any better than me, and said I'm sure he wouldn't like his daughters being treated like he did me. I told him I know he lied about his age, I don't deserve this, and I'm done and I hung up. Less than five minutes. I already feel better but now have twinges of guilt about if I did the right thing. Did I? Could I have handled it better? He is already back on the dating site, lol. Do you think he is going to come crawling back? If so, how should I handle it? It's over .. move on. If he contacts you again simply ignore him. Link to post Share on other sites
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