Rainoflight Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 Guys, you did heard this quite often from friends, relatives and people that post here, but it really GETS BETTER! Here is my story, read if you want: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/512212-my-love-not-enough, i will not talk about this, instead i will talk about how it is after 2 and half months since it happend. As many of you, i was convinced she is the one and gave her all the best in me. I sacrificed a lot for her love, to make her happy and all my personal plans went on the second base in front of he happiness and of course, i was taken for granted. I know it hurts like a mother&%# right now, but listen to me, it will get better. You will spend a lot of nights, days and hours thinking at her, you will have a lot of bipolar reactions, from wanting her back, to never feel for a thew moments that you are over her. I will tell what i did, i am not somekind of expert in this, but i felt the pain many of you feel right now and i will tell you what i did, hoping i can help, at least one of you. I did not block her on any social medias, even if maybe you should. I wanted to show her that i am a strong person, not a coward who will block everything and avoid her. She wrote me many times with stupid topics, i answered like a person that it is not interested in her at all. It was hard, but you can do it. So here it is. 1) First of all, those work on yourselves advices, they really do work. Go to gym, jogging, shopping, just do things for you. 2) Keep your mind occupied. Work, friends, social event. Do that. It doesen't matter if you are not the type, at first you need to do this. Really need too. You must not stay alone at all. 3) After a while, start flirting with women/men. It will help your confidence. I would not suggest jump in the sack with someone else in the first month after the breakup. You will feel really bad, even if the sex will be good. Things are hard, but it will get better, i promise you. Soon you will feel better. As i said, i am writing this after two and a half months, after she came in town and wanted to see me and i refused too do that. You will get tired of all those tears, you will feel tired of all that pain you feel and one morning, when you will wake up, your ex will not be the first thing that pops in your head. I have a long road ahead too, i am still not ready to try for a new relashionship, but finally i am letting go. Finally i understood that me and in this case, many of you, are not to blame, but this is what loves does sometimes. I will end this by saying: You are not alone, none of you. Keep doing what you are doing and you will you pull through this. Do not change who you are, just keep in mind that you were not weak by loving and giving someone your all. This is a sign of the fact that you know what real love is. 9
OneBigIdgit Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 good post. Thanks for caring and taking the time to reach out to others and tell your story. I'm at 2 3/4 months from a breakup that I pretty much caused. She took the action but a couple of changes in lifestyle by me was pretty much all she was asking. Those changes appeared large at the time but now I've made one to show that I can and the other would be do-able if we were to get back together. The pain has lessened, thinking about her hasn't.
Throldur Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 For me.. it's just a waiting game. If she comes back, perfect. If she doesn't.. then I guess that one chance was all I was going to get. It is what it is. I wasn't flawless and it cost me the only thing I ever wanted, the one thing that I dreamed about but didn't think would come true and so accurately to what I desired.
organizedchaos Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 (edited) And to add to this..you can and will meet someone even better. You may think you will never meet someone so amazing/unique/special again. Or that you'll never have a connection like this ever again. Or the sex will never be as good. But you'd be wrong. However you never will if you never let go. Let go. Learn from it. And in time, it will happen again. And it will be even better. I went through everything just about everyone here is posting. But I came out on top and am with a woman even more amazing than my ex and a relationship that is better, healthier, and even more sexually satisfying than before. It happened to me, it can happen to you. Edited April 4, 2015 by organizedchaos 3
Author Rainoflight Posted April 4, 2015 Author Posted April 4, 2015 I used the word "her" in my text, but this (i hope) is something for either you are a man or a woman. It doesn't really matter. What matters is that you are not alone and it will get better. Soon enough. 1
SethDamien Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 I agree with you @Rainoflight, but perhaps its just something more of a sense of power and control over yourself. the feeling that you finally shown your ex whose boss. Last month, my ex called me more than 10 times Last week, she called 5 times 4 days ago, she sent a chat inviting me out for coffee Never gave her an inch of my attention. I didnt block her, but i didnt respond to a single one. It felt really good, and i feel like i can finally move on!, but now, im back to square one. Feeling that loneliness again. Sometimes i wish she'd call me again just so that i can ignore her again... lol
BlackbirdSong Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 I agree with you @Rainoflight, but perhaps its just something more of a sense of power and control over yourself. the feeling that you finally shown your ex whose boss. Last month, my ex called me more than 10 times Last week, she called 5 times 4 days ago, she sent a chat inviting me out for coffee Never gave her an inch of my attention. I didnt block her, but i didnt respond to a single one. It felt really good, and i feel like i can finally move on!, but now, im back to square one. Feeling that loneliness again. Sometimes i wish she'd call me again just so that i can ignore her again... lol Do you think she's trying to reconcile or just feeding you breadcrumbs?
SethDamien Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 Do you think she's trying to reconcile or just feeding you breadcrumbs? breadcrumbs... all of em'. I want to be entirely unavailable so i can save every last bit of dignity i have after all the neediness and begging. 2
Author Rainoflight Posted April 8, 2015 Author Posted April 8, 2015 Seth, You are a fighter, mate. At some point, maybe you will read this again and smile because you will be over it. It is hard, all of us have a long way ahead, but even the biggest love can heal.
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