Author MommytoBe Posted April 1, 2015 Author Share Posted April 1, 2015 i finally blocked him and her, like i cant be so stressed and pregnant- its SO bad for the baby and they think its a joke, like i am not a joke. i have always been there for him and supported him through everything and now when i need him, he leaves and blames me for keeping the baby. I wish I could just disconnect. And yes, i dont get how throwing things in my face makes ANYTHING better, its just slowly consuming me. i hate people, lol..... 4 Link to post Share on other sites
ZiggyZoo Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Oh, sweetie...how awful to hear. I can't imagine how upset you must be right now. Cry it out though, you have every right to be hurt by this. Did I read in your other thread that one of them sent you pictures or something? I can't imagine two such nasty, mean people. I am so sorry that you have to go through this. Don't try to figure anything out for today, just react to the news. Tomorrow can be for what to do next. And try to remember that this trash of his isn't getting any prize. He left his pregnant girlfriend, turned his back on her and THEIR baby, and took up with her right away. Any woman with half an ounce of self-respect or brains in her head would have told this jackass to keep walking. But she didn't, and now she's won herself quite a man, indeed. I'm laughing at the two of them, how desperate they both look right now, getting engaged after a whole month, and celebrating by sending the pictures to his broken-hearted, pregnant ex. Who does that? You deserve so much better than this guy, I can't even begin to say how much. He is lacking the basics of any sort of empathy or redeeming qualities at all. Damn... I know you're still totally upset though. Let yourself be. Don't respond to them, hell, block them if you haven't already. But don't give them the satisfaction. If you do have to see them, just remember who he is, and that she's PROUD to be with him. This other chick honestly believes that your ex is the best she can do. Let that sink in. She's been so messed with, she not only condones his behavior, but encourages it. I actually feel sorry for her. As much as it hurts to get your heart broken, at least you're not the type of person who could ever behave like that. Hold your head high about that. You have a heart, they clearly don't. You're already ahead, and you didn't have to do anything. Oh, mama...great big hugs from me for sure. This sucks. It really sucks. I wish they would stop, and am sorry for what they've already done. Ahhh, I tried to keep this positive, but MY pregnancy hormones are so riled right now for you. Hang in there. Oh, hang in there. Cry and look forward to tomorrow. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ZiggyZoo Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 I'm glad you blocked him. And you CAN disconnect, from them anyway. Ugh, big hugs. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MommytoBe Posted April 1, 2015 Author Share Posted April 1, 2015 Thank you all! How is everyone doing? hopefully better than ME!! Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 I do hope that he feels some type of guilt at some point for doing this to me, but my child and I are truly the innocent party in this and we've done nothing wrong. I only tried to protect its life.. He isn't going to feel guilt. But it is only because he's not really capable of it. Think about it - a guy who can use abortion as a threat without caring about your feelings (or his baby!); a guy who can ping pong back and forth between two women. This guy is only about himself. He doesn't care about the baby, about you, or about her. So in "winning" him, she is really the loser, accepting a man who is incapable of truly loving her. You said you don't understand why this happened, because you are a good person. Well, ,first of all, this may end up being a wonderful thing. This baby may just bring you a lot of happiness. But the other thing is you let a man trick you into believing he loved you. And you kept believing him even as his actions said something different. A man who loves you will not go cheat with another woman. He won't threaten you with leaving if you don't abort his child. Whether or not you have faith, I love the Corinthians definition of love... Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. This man is not treating you with love. Remember - love isn't a feeling - it's an action. Treating someone with love means you always care about them, want them to be happy, want them to feel secure and safe and understood. The best thing for the child is probably to have him sign away his parental rights, but if money is an issue and you need the support, then do what is best for you both (you and the child, not you and HIM.) I'm sorry you are dealing with this. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 i dont know why its bothering me but he bought her two rings, proposed to her and bought her a dog.. and of course she had to send that to me. like i can barely function... Well, yay for her. She won a giant turd-man. You should look at your loss as a blessing. They deserve each other. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Strength in Healing Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 You made the right choice by keeping the kid. So now you simply accept the cards you've been dealt and learn how to become an expert poker player. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 Here is something I wrote for myself. Some of it will be helpful for you. Keep checking in here. No suffering in silence. *********************************************** 1. Recognise that you're still in the crisis phase - you are very hurt, disappointed and angry, but the intensity of your feelings will reduce. 2. Don't suppress your feelings, or tell yourself that you shouldn't be feeling what you're feeling - that never helps. 3. Externalise your feelings by writing them down, talking to a trustworthy person, or using any other mode of expression that feels right. 4. Remind yourself frequently that you can and will have a good life without this person. 5. Tell yourself frequently that you can and will love again. 6. Take care of your body: Eat enough and eat healthily. Drink enough water. Thats 1.5 litres a day for a female. Get a bit more rest than you think you need. Do some easy exercise - nothing too strenuous. If you feel physically unwell go to see your doctor. 7. Do not allow yourself to become socially isolated or withdrawn. 8. Establish Total No Contact with your ex. No contact directly, indirectly, or by social media. (This is more complicated due to your pregnancy. Low contact *might* be more appropriate.) 9. Keep up with all your responsibilities and things you have to do. 10. Do not use alcohol or drugs in an attempt to self-medicate. 11. Post here as often as you want to. People here want to help. *************************************************** Love, Satu. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Lokin4AReason Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 forgot poker, you ll just loose money on it ( i know that i would, if i played ) you need to get your mind off of it and focus on you ( and the soon to be little one ). its better not to have that negativity in your life ... ( the dude, what a loser ) also start a dairy and write down the event(s) of the day ( weather, where did you go, etc ... ). and as mentioned, don't suppress your emotion(s) nor your feeling(s) ( it ll hurt you in the long run ). and put yourself in a positive atmosphere ( like family, friends, etc ... ) along w/ signing in on here as much as you want ... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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