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Happy in new relationships or are you still going through the past breakup problems?

rollercoaster11

By rollercoaster11
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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HBK3317 Established Member

HBK3317

Posted
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You don't HAVE to block someone to be in NC. That's just for those who have zero will power or wish to permanently put someone out of their mind. I never blocked my ex but removed her from social media.

 

How do you NC without blocking!? I mean is that not the whole pont of NC! And anyways 99% after breakup won't be able to refrain from at least pretending to have called by mistake if they kept the number in their contacts!

Jonp219 Established Member

Jonp219

Posted
Posted
How do you NC without blocking!? I mean is that not the whole pont of NC! And anyways 99% after breakup won't be able to refrain from at least pretending to have called by mistake if they kept the number in their contacts!

 

I blocked my ex everywhere except her phone number. I'm just not ready to do that...

HBK3317 Established Member

HBK3317

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I blocked my ex everywhere except her phone number. I'm just not ready to do that...

 

Well bro... It will be hard real hard knowing you have that number to resist the urge to give a call... Sms... Missed call... Man Up and delete it. Trust me it's for the best

organizedchaos Established Member

organizedchaos

Posted
Posted
How do you NC without blocking!? I mean is that not the whole pont of NC! And anyways 99% after breakup won't be able to refrain from at least pretending to have called by mistake if they kept the number in their contacts!

 

Easy. You just don't contact them. You remove them from social media and you don't check up on them. That's the whole point of NC. The method by which you do it is up to you. So if blocking is the best way to prevent you from opening the cookie jar, then do it. These aren't rules written in stone tablet.

HBK3317 Established Member

HBK3317

Posted
Posted (edited)
Easy. You just don't contact them. You remove them from social media and you don't check up on them. That's the whole point of NC. The method by which you do it is up to you. So if blocking is the best way to prevent you from opening the cookie jar, then do it. These aren't rules written in stone tablet.

 

I guess for me blocking is the only way the cookie jar remains closed... Even after blocking I get tempted to sometimes unblock and just see...!

 

God damn my **** brains!

 

Just writing me made me want to see her... Aargh! How I long for this to get over! She's moved on! She won't be back! Damn it

Edited by HBK3317
Pressed post button by mistake. Hadn't completed the post
Jonp219 Established Member

Jonp219

Posted
Posted
Well bro... It will be hard real hard knowing you have that number to resist the urge to give a call... Sms... Missed call... Man Up and delete it. Trust me it's for the best

 

Only did that once bro and that was two weeks ago when I last spoke to her. I haven't had the urge to do it since, there's no point in contacting her.

HBK3317 Established Member

HBK3317

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Only did that once bro and that was two weeks ago when I last spoke to her. I haven't had the urge to do it since, there's no point in contacting her.

 

I feel you man... Let's hope this stage passes away asap...

erklat Established Member

erklat

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Bump. Post moar success stories.

HBK3317 Established Member

HBK3317

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Just a little bump :) Keep posting about your experiences who knows we might also see the proverbial light down the tunnel!

Cailinsona Member

Cailinsona

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I had blocked him (I didn't for a long time, because I was hoping he might come back) as it had been so long and I realised that I needed to move on and live my life for myself. I knew that I could be happy without him.

 

I had forgotten to block him on my apple account (I never use it) and he sent me several emails that got more ardent as time went on. I ignored all of them. He eventually called me one day when I was at work (he called from a work phone and as he had got a new job this number wasn't blocked on my phone). I hung up on him, but he kept calling and eventually I agreed to hear him out...

 

It was clear from the efforts he made to contact me that he was serious about reconciling.

 

It's true what everyone tells you here. If your ex is serious in their intentions, they will move mountains to contact you :)

wantnotshould Member

wantnotshould

Posted
Posted
I had blocked him (I didn't for a long time, because I was hoping he might come back) as it had been so long and I realised that I needed to move on and live my life for myself. I knew that I could be happy without him.

 

I had forgotten to block him on my apple account (I never use it) and he sent me several emails that got more ardent as time went on. I ignored all of them. He eventually called me one day when I was at work (he called from a work phone and as he had got a new job this number wasn't blocked on my phone). I hung up on him, but he kept calling and eventually I agreed to hear him out...

 

It was clear from the efforts he made to contact me that he was serious about reconciling.

 

It's true what everyone tells you here. If your ex is serious in their intentions, they will move mountains to contact you :)

 

You have in your hands what a lot of LS wish they had. Please keep updating.

Itspointless Established Member

Itspointless

Posted
Posted
How do you NC without blocking!? I mean is that not the whole pont of NC! And anyways 99% after breakup won't be able to refrain from at least pretending to have called by mistake if they kept the number in their contacts!
Easy. You just don't contact them. You remove them from social media and you don't check up on them. That's the whole point of NC. The method by which you do it is up to you. So if blocking is the best way to prevent you from opening the cookie jar, then do it. These aren't rules written in stone tablet.

I am not an oldtimer yet, coming close to 1.5 years mark. I never blocked her on any medium, I just made sure I couldn't see updates. That is how it is for almost a year now.

 

The strong emotions are not there any-more, I am really happy with that. But thinking of her just makes me really sad, due to the senselessness of everything. I am not searching for someone right now, but perhaps I should, I don't know.

Karin2rinkashi Established Member

Karin2rinkashi

Posted
Posted

It isn't always about being dependent on the other person.

 

In my relationship, through out, she was the one who always needed my help. She was the one who always wanted to hang out more and do more. I was always busy with my life and schedule. I gave her time, but i had my own life, friends, hobbies. She is was one part of my life and then i had another whole segment of my life.

 

So i was not at all dependent on her or seeing her as a reason of my happiness. All i saw was a trustworthy person, someone equal to me, someone i can share my road with. But still it happened to me...

 

I think sometimes it is just the other person who doesn't know what they want. Even if you do all the right things, even if you have a life on the side, it still hurts like a bitch!

  • 2 weeks later...
Cailinsona Member

Cailinsona

Posted
Posted

Thanks wantnotshould for your comments and for being interested in my story.

 

I do feel extremely lucky and very grateful to have this second chance with him.

 

I spent so long waiting and wishing he would contact me before I finally realised that I needed to move on if I was to have any hope of a happy life on my own terms.

 

This time around I know that I can cope, even flourish, if it doesn't last the distance.

 

I am very happy to report that so far our relationship just keeps growing stronger day by day.

 

Good luck to everyone on here who is going through the pain of losing someone they love. Life has a funny way of dragging you along until you eventually come through the other side :)

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