Let me save your dignity, your self respect and you Honor as a Man!Reverse-Psychology

[MissLilly]

Hmm but why did you leave? What was wrong with him?

 

1st one stopped loving me but was comfy in the relationship. He was my husband. He stopped having sex w/ me the last 2 years of our marriage without any explanation, avoided any kind of conversation i tried to start and I loved him LOADS but couldn't live like that. I didn't want to cheat on him and never did, but didn't want to have a roommate only and I was suffering with all that situation. It had to be done.

 

2nd one, boyfriend, abuse verbal and physical.

 

THERE ARE exceptions.

[MissLilly]

Oh and I read somewhere a woman is ready to go when she shuts up and the man finally starts to think the relationship is now perfect because she stopped nagging lol

 

That's true with my marriage.

 

BUT the boyfriend I had after my exH never saw it coming. Because I never told him and after the bad events we still dated normal for 6 more months (he wasn't violent in these last months). I just couldn't forget and out of the blue said I was done, no explanations.

[Jonp219]

1st one stopped loving me but was comfy in the relationship. He was my husband. He stopped having sex w/ me the last 2 years of our marriage without any explanation, avoided any kind of conversation i tried to start and I loved him LOADS but couldn't live like that. I didn't want to cheat on him and never did, but didn't want to have a roommate only and I was suffering with all that situation. It had to be done.

 

2nd one, boyfriend, abuse verbal and physical.

 

THERE ARE exceptions.

 

I'm sorry about the 2nd one, I myself am a verbal abuser with insecurities

My girlfriend of 4 years left me a month ago she just got fed up with my nonsense. I'm in therapy right now, I do yoga every week, and do some mental exercises keep myself in a peaceful state of mind. I regret pushing her away, she told me to get my **** together and I am. Come to think of it, you left your second boyfriend the same way my ex left me...

[RLG]

Hey there RLG...

I don't think that showing her that the only thing you want to hear from her is "i want you back", is that "manly" or attractive. I agree you shouldn't put up with random hollow messages, but if she wants to talk, you should talk to her only if you feel that you can handle it emotionally, regardless of what she has to say...

If you are emotionally healed, it can be really good to talk to her. If you are such a man you'll feel confidant that if you talk to her and IF you'll want her back while talking to her, you'll have the power to stir the conversation into a beginning of reconciliation.

As a female (who is NOT manipulative), I can say that I wouldn't find all the words you wrote above attractive at all. If I wanted someone back, it would have repulsed me. Even begging and pleading is less repulsive then playing games in a blunt way.

Hope you will heal soon, let her go, and wish you all the best!]

 

 

I'm sorry but I think I have to disagree with you . Is not about playing blunt games..actually is not a game is serious s h it .Now:

 

When a woman is gonna break up with her bf chances are she had this idea months before the break up...but she just had da BF around till she could find the next mate or she was waiting for that RIGHT moment.

 

While I get your idea of what are you saying...I don't believe is a good idea to keep talking to an ex gf after she says those words..Even If one were to be fully in control of his emotions..is still not a good idea.

 

She took a decision...Decision that probably she was analyzing long before she went for the kill.(..and in most cases when she goes for the actual moment of doing it:

 

1-She wasn't happy in the relationship months before going for the shot and she felt it was the right thing to do.

2-She has someone else that is making her smile and feel allot better than the current BF.

 

All it can be done in the moment when anyone heard those words is ask her if (we can work this out)tell me what is making you feel unhappy so I can work in that area and make our relationship better.

 

Chances are she is gonna say No, I need space.. I need a break blah blah(because if she really wanted to work within the relationship she wouldn't have gone with that decision in the first place) which means she already DOESN'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT WORKING OUT THE ISSUES IN THE RELATIONSHIP, if not..she could have easily try to talk things out that she doesn't like !!!AKA(making her unhappy) so then HE can work on those issues. Again Chances are she already gave up!!

 

So sorry but once again I stand by my word. She took a decision..chances are her ego wont let her take that back, and even if he ask her what can I do..there is nothing to do BECAUSE SHE ALREADY MADE HER CHOICE!!

 

If she wants to talk after she made that call!!.

 

She easily coulda have talked about it after he ask...How Can we work this out? I'm sure she can do talk the issues out right on that very same moment of we r breaking up.. But she wont.So that's why THE MANLY thing to do is accept anything she says and walk out. AND RESPECT HER DECISION!! I'm sure that would show allot of maturity, respect,control, and more.... She will be shocked that she didn't got any reaction out of him.

 

Thats why afterwards NC is the way to go because NC will cause these next reactions:

 

1-She will miss him and rethink twice about her decision and if the relationship is worth saving!!AKA SHE will initiate contact and will want to work things out if she feels the relationship is worth keeping!!

 

2-She will compare X to the new mate(if there is one,which in most cases THERE IS ONE) and see which one is more compatible. She will date the new mate probably a bit more but at the same time she will miss the X and im sure she would be going crazy in her mind the way X handled the break up and how he took it!!

 

Which is why is very important to take the break up calm and in a control manner and accept things and respect her decision with balls of steel.. If she is thinking of someone else doing the wrong steps will only push her to drop him(X) out of her mind and the new mate will start gaining space more and more in her mind ( which is def not the way any X would wanna go).

Disappearing instantly put thoughts on her mind which is damn good because the Idea here is for her to think more about again X than the new mate she is probably dating!!

 

Also:

I think you misunderstood tho..is not like if the dumpee(X) goes full NC he is gonna receive a magic message saying I want you back!!. I never stated like that..this is what most likely will happen afterwards:

 

1-I been thinking about the decision I took, can you come over so we can talk about it.(shes been thinking about the shot she took and feels like the relationship is worth saving)

 

2- I regret the call I made, would you come over..I want us to work this out.( very small chance of this to happen because of EGO, but it could tho)

 

3-I been missing you allot and thinking about us allot too, can you come over I wanna talk about us and our relationship.(she already misses the relationship and doesn't feel as happy she thought without X, she wants to work the issues out)

 

You getting my point here. .She went out..stayed single for a couple days..dated someone..had fun but:

 

If she feels happy and relieved without X!!!(He is done)

If she feels like she cant live without him,, miss the relationship and it just doesn't feel right(she will move mountains to get back with him)

 

PEACE OUT

RLG

Edited March 6, 2015 by RLG

[Jonp219]

I'm sorry but I think I have to disagree with you . Is not about playing blunt games..actually is not a game is serious s h it .Now:

 

When a woman is gonna break up with her bf chances are she had this idea months before the break up...but she just had da BF around till she could find the next mate or she was waiting for that RIGHT moment.

 

While I get your idea of what are you saying...I don't believe is a good idea to keep talking to an ex gf after she says those words..Even If one were to be fully in control of his emotions..is still not a good idea.

 

She took a decision...Decision that probably she was analyzing long before she went for the kill.(..and in most cases when she goes for the actual moment of doing it:

 

1-She wasn't happy in the relationship months before going for the shot and she felt it was the right thing to do.

2-She has someone else that is making her smile and feel allot better than the current BF.

 

All it can be done in the moment when anyone heard those words is ask her if (we can work this out)tell me what is making you feel unhappy so I can work in that area and make our relationship better.

 

Chances are she is gonna say No, I need space.. I need a break blah blah(because if she really wanted to work within the relationship she wouldn't have gone with that decision in the first place) which means she already DOESN'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT WORKING OUT THE ISSUES IN THE RELATIONSHIP, if not..she could have easily try to talk things out that she doesn't like !!!AKA(making her unhappy) so then HE can work on those issues. Again Chances are she already gave up!!

 

So sorry but once again I stand by my word. She took a decision..chances are her ego wont let her take that back, and even if he ask her what can I do..there is nothing to do BECAUSE SHE ALREADY MADE HER CHOICE!!

 

If she wants to talk after she made that call!!.

 

She easily coulda have talked about it after he ask...How Can we work this out? I'm sure she can do talk the issues out right on that very same moment of we r breaking up.. But she wont.So that's why THE MANLY thing to do is accept anything she says and walk out. AND RESPECT HER DECISION!! I'm sure that would show allot of maturity, respect,control, and more.... She will be shocked that she didn't got any reaction out of him.

 

Thats why afterwards NC is the way to go because NC will cause these next reactions:

 

1-She will miss him and rethink twice about her decision and if the relationship is worth saving!!AKA SHE will initiate contact and will want to work things out if she feels the relationship is worth keeping!!

 

2-She will compare X to the new mate(if there is one,which in most cases THERE IS ONE) and see which one is more compatible. She will date the new mate probably a bit more but at the same time she will miss the X and im sure she would be going crazy in her mind the way X handled the break up and how he took it!!

 

Which is why is very important to take the break up calm and in a control manner and accept things and respect her decision with balls of steel.. If she is thinking of someone else doing the wrong steps will only push her to drop him(X) out of her mind and the new mate will start gaining space more and more in her mind ( which is def not the way any X would wanna go).

Disappearing instantly put thoughts on her mind which is damn good because the Idea here is for her to think more about again X than the new mate she is probably dating!!

 

Also:

I think you misunderstood tho..is not like if the dumpee(X) goes full NC he is gonna receive a magic message saying I want you back!!. I never stated like that..this is what most likely will happen afterwards:

 

1-I been thinking about the decision I took, can you come over so we can talk about it.(shes been thinking about the shot she took and feels like the relationship is worth saving)

 

2- I regret the call I made, would you come over..I want us to work this out.( very small chance of this to happen because of EGO, but it could tho)

 

3-I been missing you allot and thinking about us allot too, can you come over I wanna talk about us and our relationship.(she already misses the relationship and doesn't feel as happy she thought without X, she wants to work the issues out)

 

You getting my point here. .She went out..stayed single for a couple days..dated someone..had fun but:

 

If she feels happy and relieved without X!!!(He is done)

If she feels like she cant live without him,, miss the relationship and it just doesn't feel right(she will move mountains to get back with him)

 

PEACE OUT

RLG

 

It's ok to miss her. Your woulds are still fresh and so are mine. We're going to go through this pain for a while my friend, for now let's try to stay busy and focus on our passions and work.

[RLG]

It's ok to miss her. Your woulds are still fresh and so are mine. We're going to go through this pain for a while my friend, for now let's try to stay busy and focus on our passions and work.

 

I wish it was only missing her. I love her. I want her. I wanna grab a bull by the horns and beat the **** out of it. Eat the world and have it at the palm of my hand in order for her too see the I'm right one..the one. But too late because the image she has of me is Def not that one.

[Mi7522]

I wish it was only missing her. I love her. I want her. I wanna grab a bull by the horns and beat the **** out of it. Eat the world and have it at the palm of my hand in order for her too see the I'm right one..the one. But too late because the image she has of me is Def not that one.

 

Dude it's time to focus on you now, you're in a horrible place right and she will never come back to that. You will probably need months of self reflection and working on you before you should even attempt another relationship whether it be with her or someone else.

[Jonp219]

Dude it's time to focus on you now, you're in a horrible place right and she will never come back to that. You will probably need months of self reflection and working on you before you should even attempt another relationship whether it be with her or someone else.

 

Like he said my friend this is our time to evolve.

 

Even if you feel like you can never get her back, at least use her leaving as motivation to help you work on yourself. Just tell yourself, "I'll show her what a real man is like". Then who knows, maybe she'll come crawling back, maybe you'll find someone better, maybe you can surprise her one day. We don't know what the future holds, all we have is the present. Now let's make the best of it.