StanMusial Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 Hmmm, sounds like a college road trip. Old married couples? Come on, have a few nickels to rub together, damn. Just say you and hubby have plans and it wouldn't work out. Kinda presumptuous to put you in a spot like that. Kinda pathetic and shameless to impose on someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 A large group of us are going to an out of town wedding. There's a thread on FB talking about the various activities. One of the women is begging people to share a hotel room with her because otherwise she can't afford to go. One couple already has a single woman in with them so they don't want a fourth person. Other women are leaving their husbands home & sharing. DH & I have our own room & we want to keep it that way but now people are calling me selfish & mean because I haven't offered to let this woman stay with us. Bear a few things in mind: 1. I have never met this woman! 2. The hotel room is $115 per night. The airfare is the killer here ($300 when I bought our tickets; closer to $500 now) 3. I think it would be unbelievably awkward to have another woman in the room I was sharing with my husband. Everybody would have to get changed in the bathroom. I have no interest in being inconvenienced by a stranger. I firmly believe that if this woman can't afford the hotel room she ought to just stay home. That said, I'm kind of annoyed that other mutual friends are trying to make this my problem and I have said so. LS, please assure me that I am not the one who is off in this situation. FWIW, everybody in this equation is over 40. We're not taking about broke college kids here, although several people are the parents of broke college kids lol Donnivain, Maybe it's time you get some new friends, cause it seems like every few months some strange group debacle comes up and specifically about hotel rooms too. That's one of my pet peeves, group things that turn into a hassle, I absolutely haaaaate that feeling of trying to do something that's supposed to be fun, chill or enjoyable and it becomes a whole parliamentary process...ugh!!!! Hence, when I do stuff sometimes I just do them alone or with one or two of my low stress friends where no one is particularly bossy or picky so it can be a good experience with minimal comprises. But to have people piping up about my choices and all in my business and always needing to arrange these group things, fccccuk that, that's for the birds! I totally agree with you. I would not as a couple want to share a hotel room with a random woman. If I were going alone MAYBE...but even so, if I choose to have my room to myself that's my prerogative and I would not force anyone to share or think them selfish if they'd rather be alone. If she can't go, she can't go. If she is not in the bridal party, then she can look at pics, she'll be alright! Even on her part, I don't see why she'd even be hell bent on this. I would ask if any single woman wanted a room partner but if no one piped up I would NEVER dream of asking a strange couple to share their room...that would be so odd to me! I would rather stay home than do that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 Who is calling you selfish? Those are the people you should avoiding entirely... I agree! It seems, also remembering the last hotel debacle story of a drunk woman, that some of these people you know are quite petty and immature for grown folks and cause you more stress than anything else and I'd nix them immediately! For adult people to want to shame a couple into sharing a room with a random woman...I mean come on. As thefooloftheyear said, if they feel that strongly about it and the room is just $115, then I'm sure they can all pool together $23 each from different sources until it adds up, they only have to ask like 5 people. Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 Heck, couple or alone....Aside from the whole "personal space" issue, I dont like sharing a bathroom(especially in a relatively confined area with someone I dont know...I barely let my own mother use my personal bathroom... Many years ago, I had to share a room with a guy I barely knew when we didnt book enough for an event we all attended....He was a big heavy, hairy dude,...walked around the room in his underwear, farting and burping...Snored like a bear, then tore the hell out of the bathroom in the morning....Never again!! TFY 2 Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 I mean, I've had to go to different conferences and programs and things like that which were paid for and some of the times the arrangement is that you share a room. It's all worked out fine, BUT that's a different scenario. It's not a vacation and something necessarily fun and I'm not with a partner planning to relax and already know it's just gonna be a place to lay my head for a night or two. Plus the fact that neither of us paid for it or had a choice helps you to put yourself in a different frame of mind about it. But on a vacation or fun trip I'm paying for out of pocket???!! Hell no...I reserve the right for it to be up to MY liking and to have my privacy. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 I think you should go and leave your husband at home, that way the woman won't feel awkward and you can get to know her and you can make a new friend. OR You and your husband could stay at home and donate your room to this woman - awkwardness solved, she gets the room for nothing and you and your husband can always watch the wedding video. Link to post Share on other sites
Author d0nnivain Posted February 27, 2015 Author Share Posted February 27, 2015 Elaine I already paid for mine & my husband's non refundable ticket. I do not like attending weddings alone. I prefer to go with my husband. These other women are leaving their husbands home so they can party like they are single (minus the hook-ups) To me, that is what the bachelorette party I am skipping is for, not the wedding. As a single person I too have shared hotel rooms with "strangers" but that was always at as an alumni attending a sorority convention. Again, as I have said, if I was going to this wedding alone, I would probably cave & let this woman stay with me. But not for 5 days with me & my husband MissBee -- To some extent you are right I have cut contact with these people to a large extent. It's not always my childhood friends who are the source of the drama. It's more the people they have become friends with as adults who I don't care for & whose behavior causes me stress. There are so many things about this wedding that are already making me sorry I booked early. I actually already tried to cancel our tickets but the cost / loss was too much and I know it will really upset the bride. I am trying to remind myself that this is for her & that all I have to do is smile & put up with her dopey, immature friends who seem to bring out the worse in my childhood friends. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 Elaine I already paid for mine & my husband's non refundable ticket. I do not like attending weddings alone. I prefer to go with my husband. These other women are leaving their husbands home so they can party like they are single (minus the hook-ups) To me, that is what the bachelorette party I am skipping is for, not the wedding. . I wasn't being serious. Hence the Of course it is ludicrous, you and your husband shouldn't be asked to share your room with a complete stranger for 5 days.... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author d0nnivain Posted February 27, 2015 Author Share Posted February 27, 2015 I wasn't being serious. Hence the Of course it is ludicrous, you and your husband shouldn't be asked to share your room with a complete stranger for 5 days.... Sorry. Even with emoticons I never "get" sarcasm in writing. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
BikerAccnt Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 Definitely an odd request, and if you aren't comfortable with it then don't. That said, I've slept in a room with another couple (on the floor however) and have shared my room with random "Strangers" My MC is nationwide, and we have yearly rendezvous in different states. Often, people are looking to share rooms to help with expenses. I may not know the person other than they are a club member. And trust me, that doesn't always count for much! As I get older, I share my room much less often. But, it's still your choice, and you have every right to not do it. Link to post Share on other sites
Shepp Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 Weird if you ask me! I'm not fussy about sharing a room, me and my gf have shared with other mates. But sharing with a stranger for 5 days seems very much to the extreme! Certainly not something you'd be socially expected to do by any rate. Not sure why your friends think different. Link to post Share on other sites
Davey L Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 Wife and I have shared with friends before but not strangers. You've paid a lot of money for the trip and you should be able to enjoy the time with your husband. You didn't pay a lot of money so you could have a stranger in your room. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Shining One Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 This concept is so weird to me. I would go to weddings with a bunch of other single guys and we each got our own rooms. We were in our twenties, so it's not like we were well off at that point. Link to post Share on other sites
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