Author E-Squared Posted February 19, 2015 Author Share Posted February 19, 2015 I can say that I remember a few female friends that I had when I was in middle school were mostly on the platonic level and I don't think I viewed them as anything more. Hell, there was even a female friend who was a coworker that a lot of people swore that she had the hots for me, but the friend often told people that there was nothing going between us. Some people even said that I was too blind to see it, but I tried to tell them that we were only friends. I don't know if I was in denial or what. Link to post Share on other sites
Winston_Smith Posted February 19, 2015 Share Posted February 19, 2015 I love my female friends! Women, I find, tend to be better than men when it comes to nurturing friendships. They're dependable, caring and just more fun to talk with. The only time it ever becomes a problem in my experience is when that girl friend gets a boyfriend, one that she finds sexually attractive, but with whom she shares nothing else in common. That means I get to take her out to eat her favorite foods, watch movies she wants to watch, do activities she's into, etc., because the boyfriend could care less about her interests. Meanwhile, he gets to sleep with her and I go home alone. Link to post Share on other sites
AVarma Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 I think the only way a man and woman can be friends is if a relationship is not possible, for ex. because one or both of them are attached. If they're both single I can't imagine it lasting for long. Eventually their compatibility will mean they will end up dating. Other people certainly won't believe they're friends and will probably ask why they're not together. Link to post Share on other sites
NJ123 Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 I love my female friends! Women, I find, tend to be better than men when it comes to nurturing friendships. They're dependable, caring and just more fun to talk with. The only time it ever becomes a problem in my experience is when that girl friend gets a boyfriend, one that she finds sexually attractive, but with whom she shares nothing else in common. That means I get to take her out to eat her favorite foods, watch movies she wants to watch, do activities she's into, etc., because the boyfriend could care less about her interests. Meanwhile, he gets to sleep with her and I go home alone. And why do you want to be that guy for? If you have feelings for them, it's probably better to just cut them out of your life instead of letting something like that happen. A horrible position to be in for a guy, unless there's no sexual attraction to her whatsoever. Link to post Share on other sites
EveAFlame Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 I have male friends. I doubt that any of them see me in a sexual way. I certainly don't see them that way. We go out to eat, hang out, help each other. I think it is TOTALLY possible. It rubs me the wrong way when people blather on about friendzones. If a girl is using a guy as an "emotional tampon" then she's not really his friend is she? And if he's just being friendly, hoping to eventually get into her pants well then he's not a friend to her. They are opportunists manipulating people to get what they want. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SincereOnlineGuy Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 Why do some people feel that it is never possible and that people of the opposite sex shouldn't be friends? I am friendly with some women and I don't exhibit any romantic or sexual interest in some. I have a few female friends who I hardly ever show any sort of romantic or sexual interest in. Some guy in another thread, who I can see is sexist, said that I should only have friends in the same gender. Why is that? Not to mention that he said that women are good for something pleasurable. Now I know he was being sexist on that one. What do you think? No one says it isn't "possible" ! Where did you get that?? Males have zero interest in so doing (excepting workplace, neighborhood, family friends, etc) with women said men wouldn't rather be banging. That's it ... {per-i-od} Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 New new view on women friends, is that if if they aren't giving you oral, there's no point in keeping her around. Link to post Share on other sites
AVarma Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 New new view on women friends, is that if if they aren't giving you oral, there's no point in keeping her around. Line of the year right here. Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 My two current closest friends are men and both are in serious relationships. Things are completely platonic but...if they were single I have a feeling things would be different. Link to post Share on other sites
ASG Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 I have always had male friends. SOmetimes they were hoping for something more, but more often than not, they've been in serious relationships and if they lust after me, it is very well disguised and our relationship is strictly platonic. These days I rely quite heavily on my work husband. We hang out a lot! And his wife joins us frequently. I love her to bits and it's mutual! I love my girl friends, but my boy friends also have a special place! Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 My new view on women friends, is that if they aren't giving you oral, there's no point in keeping them around. Line of the year right here. It's the best way I can think of to avoid being friendzoned. I know that if I'm friends with a girl, eventually I'll want to date her. I've also never been able to turn a friend into a girlfriend or sleep with girls who were my friends, so I know that trying to make those things happen is futile. So in order to avoid that sick feeling of having a friendship fall apart because I liked a girl and she didn't like me back and the constant feeling of being frustrated because I'm not doing what I really want with her, it's better to just not have any women as friends I spend time with if I'm not dating them or sleeping with them. Link to post Share on other sites
hotpotato Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 It's the best way I can think of to avoid being friendzoned. I know that if I'm friends with a girl, eventually I'll want to date her. I've also never been able to turn a friend into a girlfriend or sleep with girls who were my friends, so I know that trying to make those things happen is futile. So in order to avoid that sick feeling of having a friendship fall apart because I liked a girl and she didn't like me back and the constant feeling of being frustrated because I'm not doing what I really want with her, it's better to just not have any women as friends I spend time with if I'm not dating them or sleeping with them. Ive thought about adopting the a similar ideology-if I dont want to eff a man he wont be my friend. Its kinda sad, but I find that men usually dont want to be friends. If we have a mutual attraction there is less drama. Really the men would be suitors and not friends, but this is how many guy friends view themselves anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 wasting your time, money and energy on women you are not sleeping with is illogical and makes no sense in my book. if you want to have female aquaintences (sp?) that is fine. since they are not friends they become potential women to date. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 Ive thought about adopting the a similar ideology-if I dont want to eff a man he wont be my friend. Its kinda sad, but I find that men usually dont want to be friends. If we have a mutual attraction there is less drama. Really the men would be suitors and not friends, but this is how many guy friends view themselves anyway. Yeah, I do think it's sad too. I really do like having women as friends. The problem is that if I enjoy a woman's company enough to want her as a friend I'll most likely also want to date her. As long as the woman is halfway decent looking, I can't think of any reason why I wouldn't want to date a woman who is a friend. I can't mentally separate "cute friend" from "potential girlfriend." Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted February 20, 2015 Share Posted February 20, 2015 It would seem odd to me that a man and woman can't be friends. I understand being respectful of people in relationships and either being friends with both or only in a very limited way if only with one. It seems though that the consensus of this thread for men is that female friends or women in general are only good for one thing. If you can't have sex with them, they are of no value. Link to post Share on other sites
Eagle's-bargain Posted February 22, 2015 Share Posted February 22, 2015 Why do some people feel that it is never possible and that people of the opposite sex shouldn't be friends? I am friendly with some women and I don't exhibit any romantic or sexual interest in some. I have a few female friends who I hardly ever show any sort of romantic or sexual interest in. What do you think? What constitutes a friend? I have made it a point to consider women I am friendly with, to call them my "professional colleague". Why? Because I've been hurt before by a "friend" who was a woman. If there are no similarities professionally it doesn't work with hetrosexuals. My friendships are close, often like a family member. I would do things for a friend that I would probably hesitate doing with a GF of six months. Imagine how a GF would feel if my woman friend was being treated in a different manner. Or if my idea of going out on the weekend with my friend to drink didn't include my GF, but included my woman friend. I've tried it, and it does not work. If at anytime someone has more than just a friend attraction, it's game over. Link to post Share on other sites
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