orangetree Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 Only because NOW he isn't seeing other girls doesn't mean that he won't in the near future. This guy obviously doesn't want exclusivity with you and says you can have 'dinner' with other guys too to have an excuse to see other girls. Three months into a relationship he should know if he wants an exclusive relationship with you or not and he obviously doesn't. LEAVE NOW! Link to post Share on other sites
Author mmlee Posted January 29, 2015 Author Share Posted January 29, 2015 I feel pretty crappy. He doesn't even want to see me, saying over text "you are just coming over to break up with me".... i don't know what to do. Guidance please. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 I feel pretty crappy. He doesn't even want to see me, saying over text "you are just coming over to break up with me".... i don't know what to do. Guidance please. You either walk away or you beg him to see you. Or sit and wait. I'm sure he'll let up soon enough and allow you in. You dinged his ego so he's subtly punishing you for it by making you feel bad. Maybe he wants to hear you beg and swear you'll never do that so he can claim some sick control over you. Next time you will know better than to set your terms because he's always been the one to do the dumping. I'm not sure what guidance you need. Your friends, family and a forum are all telling you to leave him. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 I don't know, when it's good, I enjoy his company. And he is good looking? And good on paper? When you posted this, my first thought was that you're young hence find the superficial more appealing. As you get older, what you value starts to change and depth becomes more important. You're 33. And your other thread a few months ago, which I do believe is the guy before this one was also an idiot. Maybe time to take a break from dating. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mmlee Posted January 29, 2015 Author Share Posted January 29, 2015 When you posted this, my first thought was that you're young hence find the superficial more appealing. As you get older, what you value starts to change and depth becomes more important. You're 33. And your other thread a few months ago, which I do believe is the guy before this one was also an idiot. Maybe time to take a break from dating. I haven't dated in the past 4 years, chose to be single. This whole dating thing is brand new to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 I haven't dated in the past 4 years, chose to be single. This whole dating thing is brand new to me. Dating being new to you doesnt justify making and living with bad decisions. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 How was I clingy? Wasn't I the one trying to end it? You were not trying to end it, you were trying to manipulate the situation with passive-aggressiveness. You told him you didn't think you wanted to see him anymore in an attempt to pull him to you thinking that he might have stronger feelings and not allow you to move on. If you were serious about not seeing him anymore, you would not have been swayed by the fact that he was hurt. He was hurt and you played on that by recanting. In that moment he was a little vulnerable and had a knee jerk reaction and became angry because you were displaying similar traits to other women he had dated. Flakiness. This man told you he was not at a point where he knew he wanted to focus on you. You two were not on the same page and you should have flat out ended it there. When you enter into these kinds of relationship "talks", you need to be clear in your head about what you want at the time and listen to the other person. If they are not on that page, you need to be prepared to move on, plain and simple and not be wishy washy. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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