Why should I have to apologize?

[Phoe]

WHY do you even want this woman?

 

 

Having sex in a cab in the first place, is gross.

 

 

Offering this information up to a current partner in the first place, is realllllly quite unnecessary.

 

 

Now she refuses to talk to you until you do as she says.

 

 

So, what's so great? Go for a more reasonable woman!

[quickA]

WHY do you even want this woman?

 

 

Having sex in a cab in the first place, is gross.

 

 

Offering this information up to a current partner in the first place, is realllllly quite unnecessary.

 

 

Now she refuses to talk to you until you do as she says.

 

 

So, what's so great? Go for a more reasonable woman!

 

i am going to call her now -- not to apologize but to say that if she cant get over this then its her problem

 

i will keep everyone posted on what happens if youre interested

[quickA]

that didnt go well

 

i told her i wasnt going to apologize right away and she told me that the reason why im completely wrong was that, the night she did it in the cab, she was wearing a dress and because of that the driver couldnt see anything

 

i told her that i wasnt saying anything firm, just that maybe she was putting on a show for the driver whether she knew or not

 

she is saying that i have to admit that i am wrong and it isnt possible -- i refuse to do so because even if my original comment was not so great -- everyone knows that if you f**k in a cab there is another person likely watchin

 

i also told her that if she meant to brag about it, i found it gross (to do it in a cab) and she says that im just saying $hit to piss her off and that lots of people our age (late 20s) have done things like that

 

she hung up - so whats next

[Phoe]

that didnt go well

 

i told her i wasnt going to apologize right away and she told me that the reason why im completely wrong was that, the night she did it in the cab, she was wearing a dress and because of that the driver couldnt see anything

 

i told her that i wasnt saying anything firm, just that maybe she was putting on a show for the driver whether she knew or not

 

she is saying that i have to admit that i am wrong and it isnt possible -- i refuse to do so because even if my original comment was not so great -- everyone knows that if you f**k in a cab there is another person likely watchin

 

i also told her that if she meant to brag about it, i found it gross (to do it in a cab) and she says that im just saying $hit to piss her off and that lots of people our age (late 20s) have done things like that

 

she hung up - so whats next

 

 

"You're totally wrong because the night I boned a dude in a cab right next to a stranger, I was wearing a dress."

 

 

umm.

 

 

what's next? I'd move on, personally. yuck

[Diezel]

What's next? Go meet other women. Maybe a woman with class, next time.

[SomeDude16]

that didnt go well

 

i told her i wasnt going to apologize right away and she told me that the reason why im completely wrong was that, the night she did it in the cab, she was wearing a dress and because of that the driver couldnt see anything

 

i told her that i wasnt saying anything firm, just that maybe she was putting on a show for the driver whether she knew or not

 

she is saying that i have to admit that i am wrong and it isnt possible -- i refuse to do so because even if my original comment was not so great -- everyone knows that if you f**k in a cab there is another person likely watchin

 

i also told her that if she meant to brag about it, i found it gross (to do it in a cab) and she says that im just saying $hit to piss her off and that lots of people our age (late 20s) have done things like that

 

she hung up - so whats next

 

I see a few options here:

 

#1(bold option)- Have sex with her in a cab and see f you get caught so you can find out who's right. If she is, you apologize. If not, she apologizes. and you get to have sex.

 

#2(passive option) Give up your identity and manhood and apologize to her. Rewarded with keeping her. Con, she is the dominant one in the relationship

 

#3(smart option)- let her be mad and she can either forget about it/ get over it and move on. Rewarded with keeping your pride. Con, you might lose her.

 

you pick.

[quickA]

"You're totally wrong because the night I boned a dude in a cab right next to a stranger, I was wearing a dress."

 

 

umm.

 

 

what's next? I'd move on, personally. yuck

 

since i have known her she has not been so crazy -- shes been the conservative type (even in the past or thats what she told me) so it was shocking when she told me about this

[quickA]

What's next? Go meet other women. Maybe a woman with class, next time.

 

not to fight, but i am wondering if women do have sex outdoors sometimes? would that make a woman less classy?

[Diezel]

not to fight, but i am wondering if women do have sex outdoors sometimes? would that make a woman less classy?

 

Um, let's break this down for you.

 

#1: She offered up information about her sexual past, in public, with someone in the front seat driving them around. Trust me, the cab driver knows.

 

#2: She asks you to apologize over her own situation, because you made a joke.

 

#3: Plenty of women have sex outdoors, IN PRIVATE. Not in a moving vehicle while someone else is driving, specially a STRANGER. It demonstrates a clear lack of boundaries.

[quickA]

Um, let's break this down for you.

 

#1: She offered up information about her sexual past, in public, with someone in the front seat driving them around. Trust me, the cab driver knows.

 

#2: She asks you to apologize over her own situation, because you made a joke.

 

#3: Plenty of women have sex outdoors, IN PRIVATE. Not in a moving vehicle while someone else is driving, specially a STRANGER. It demonstrates a clear lack of boundaries.

 

i agree with what your are saying, she was just arguing that because she had a dress on (that is she wasnt naked ) everything was kept hidden and therefore no one could have seen anything -- which i guess she equals to just having sex in public like others

[Zahara]

i agree with what your are saying, she was just arguing that because she had a dress on (that is she wasnt naked ) everything was kept hidden and therefore no one could have seen anything -- which i guess she equals to just having sex in public like others

 

There's a difference between...say, having sex in a park, in the dark with no one else around versus having sex in a cab while the driver is only inches away from you.

 

If she had no issues with a stranger inches away from her, hearing her moaning/groaning and possibly seeing at least her face in all its glow through the rear mirror -- I don't understand the extreme reaction towards your comment.

 

You busted her ego when she was hoping for a different response from you. That is why she is pissed.

 

I don't know why you're not repulsed. It's just gross.

[quickA]

There's a difference between...say, having sex in a park, in the dark with no one else around versus having sex in a cab while the driver is only inches away from you.

 

If she had no issues with a stranger inches away from her, hearing her moaning/groaning and possibly seeing at least her face in all its glow through the rear mirror -- I don't understand the extreme reaction towards your comment.

 

You busted her ego when she was hoping for a different response from you. That is why she is pissed.

I don't know why you're not repulsed. It's just gross.

 

i never knew she did something like this before, she is very conservative -- had two bfs before me, never had one night stands, that type of girl -- i dont know what she expected me to say when she told me this

[contact1]

I'ma have to start carrying a black light whenever I take a cab now

[Trenton100]

that didnt go well

 

i told her i wasnt going to apologize right away and she told me that the reason why im completely wrong was that, the night she did it in the cab, she was wearing a dress and because of that the driver couldnt see anything

 

i told her that i wasnt saying anything firm, just that maybe she was putting on a show for the driver whether she knew or not

 

she is saying that i have to admit that i am wrong and it isnt possible -- i refuse to do so because even if my original comment was not so great -- everyone knows that if you f**k in a cab there is another person likely watchin

 

i also told her that if she meant to brag about it, i found it gross (to do it in a cab) and she says that im just saying $hit to piss her off and that lots of people our age (late 20s) have done things like that

 

she hung up - so whats next

 

Nothing is next.

[todreaminblue]

but i dont understand how i can offend her by saying what i did -- i didnt make anything up - i just said that it was possible that the driver saw something

 

and ya she said she was going to wait until i apologized before talking again

 

 

honestly .....i dont understand how she can be upset when she told you she porked a guy in the back seat of a cab...to claim offense...... but she did get offended ....i think if you want the matter to be dropped you have to deal with the offense she feels..... whether or not she should be offended doesnt really matter...what matters if you want this situation to be resolved....i feel she wont back down.....deb

[Zahara]

i never knew she did something like this before, she is very conservative -- had two bfs before me, never had one night stands, that type of girl -- i dont know what she expected me to say when she told me this

 

She's conservative just because she told you? I find it hard to believe that someone can go from conservative to sex in a cab with a stranger inches away from her. That's one extreme to another. I have to wonder if your perception of her isn't what it truly is.

[SomeDude16]

Tell her, "Ill pick you up in 30 min at your place with a cab. Wear the same dress and we will see who is right"..... seriously, do it.

[PaperCrane]

I'ma have to start carrying a black light whenever I take a cab now

 

Nooooo, do not do that. A buddy of mine and I took out blacklights one night on the town just to see where stuff ends up.

 

Let's just say if I could bathe in sanitizer I would. Your world will never be the same again.

[venusishername]

hello all, this is my first post and i was hoping to hear your thoughts

 

i have been dating this 27 year old woman for about 8 months and things are pretty good. the other day she was talking about the times where she had sex outdoors and she mentioned that she had sex with her ex in a cab on the way back from a club.

 

she told me that she had gotten rid of her undergarments and sat on her ex's lap. i joked around and said that the cab driver must have gotten an eye full of her lady bits and she flipped out.

 

she said that i was being immature. and then i was told to apologize for saying that. i dont understand why i have to say im sorry. i didnt say anything wrong. she says that its disrespectful towards her that i would say that, but i told her that it was most likely true since she did have sex inside the car. she still believes that there was no way she could have flashed the driver.

 

so now i have to apologize before she talks to me again.

 

so what are your thoughts?

 

 

Are you serious? How immature.

Wtf. She tells you about her previous sexual escapades, (not that it's disrespectful to you to say that, but I'd still be a little miffed) and then gets mad at YOU for making a simple and innocent comment in response?

Having sex in the backseat of a taxi, and she flips out because you point out that the driver could've seen it?

Sounds like she's a girl, not a woman.

You don't need to apologize. She put that over your head? You need to apologize before she talks to you again? Again, wtf.

[Purepony]

Jump that ship! She's nuts

[Redhead14]

hello all, this is my first post and i was hoping to hear your thoughts

 

i have been dating this 27 year old woman for about 8 months and things are pretty good. the other day she was talking about the times where she had sex outdoors and she mentioned that she had sex with her ex in a cab on the way back from a club.

 

she told me that she had gotten rid of her undergarments and sat on her ex's lap. i joked around and said that the cab driver must have gotten an eye full of her lady bits and she flipped out.

 

she said that i was being immature. and then i was told to apologize for saying that. i dont understand why i have to say im sorry. i didnt say anything wrong. she says that its disrespectful towards her that i would say that, but i told her that it was most likely true since she did have sex inside the car. she still believes that there was no way she could have flashed the driver.

 

so now i have to apologize before she talks to me again.

 

so what are your thoughts?

 

Seriously, she's calling you out for that comment when she is telling you about taking her underwear off and basically lapdancing her ex in a cab! I don't care how long or what kind of relationship she had with him, that's inappropriate.

 

Whether you should apologize is not the question here, the question is what kind of woman are you dating? I would simply tell her that she was describing an explicit scene and similar remarks fit the situation. If she doesn't speak to you again over it, then dump her.

[preraph]

Well, she's got the nerve to bring up something like that and then get mad at your little comment? She's a bit defensive. Don't apologize. Just tell her she's who brought it up (as long as that is truly the case -- if you brought up the subject that ended up her telling you that, then follow your conscience.)

[Ruby Slippers]

She called you immature?

 

You called the situation for what it was, and she didn't like that. You suggested she was behaving carelessly by having sex in a car a few feet from a stranger. IMO, you were correct that this was careless behavior. Obviously she expected you to be impressed with this story in some way, and when you weren't, she got mad. You don't accept her careless, exhibitionist sexual past as charming, cute, sexy, fun, or whatever she considers it to be, and that ticks her off. The irony is that if she really felt at peace with her actions, if she didn't agree with you on some level that what she did was careless, she wouldn't be offended by what you said.

 

Apologizing would be pandering to her read of the situation as harmless fun. But that's not how you view it, so it would be lying.

 

She wants a guy who won't judge or criticize her past exhibitionist behavior, and that isn't you. And I don't blame you. I would be pretty turned off by this, too.

 

Hold your ground and don't apologize for what was a fair comment. I suspect this will be the beginning of the end, as I don't think you're going to change your mind and neither is she.