she left me

[alexwood]

i made this thread

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/500784-my-girlfriend-going-out-state-see-her-guy-friend

 

well tonight she left me

 

said she loves the guy and they planned on being together after he got done with the service 4 years from now

 

and she decided she just wants to wait for him

 

sooo yea

 

i got dumped for a guy who will be overseas for 4 years

[acrosstheuniverse]

Really sorry to hear this OP. I was one of the posters in your other thread defending her right to go see a friend without it being assumed she'd cheat. I still think that you ought to trust people until they give you a reason to distrust them and hope that this won't make you more paranoid and worried in future about girlfriends with guy friends. Unfortunately it sounds like your ex was going to go after this guy whether she had to visit him to do it or he was in the same town.

 

 

To be honest, it all seems like a bit of a pipe dream of theirs. I remember when I got with an ex he'd just gone to join the Navy. He ended up dropping out a few months later when my Mother died as he didn't want to leave me (and he didn't enjoy the military life as much as he thought he would either). I remember when I got with him I was on board with the Navy thing, accepted it as part of the relationship and worth it to get to be with him. Looking back now, if he hadn't have left quickly, I know I'd have ended up ending it. During the first flush of infatuation it's easy to think it's worth it, it's easy to persuade yourself you can handle it, but as time progresses the realities of being in a relationship with somebody who is never there and who could be up to anything at any time sets in. For me it would have been essentially living a single life without the benefits of being able to meet someone else, and once life got hard and sht hit the fan, like losing my Mom, I know I'd have wanted a partner who could hold me through the night as I grieved, not somebody a phone call away or stuck under the ocean.

 

If it makes you feel any better I wouldn't be surprised if it crashes and burns and this is just infatuation, but you're better off without her. She obviously wasn't that into you anymore and you can do better. Leave her to it, block her on social media, delete her from your life and start to heal and move on. You'll look back when you're happy again and see that this is one of the best things that ever happened to you (I know it's impossible to believe right now, but from someone who's been there, I know it's coming for you). And in the meantime look after yourself, see your friends and family for support and make very sure not to have any contact with her or him.

[alexwood]

Really sorry to hear this OP. I was one of the posters in your other thread defending her right to go see a friend without it being assumed she'd cheat. I still think that you ought to trust people until they give you a reason to distrust them and hope that this won't make you more paranoid and worried in future about girlfriends with guy friends. Unfortunately it sounds like your ex was going to go after this guy whether she had to visit him to do it or he was in the same town.

 

 

To be honest, it all seems like a bit of a pipe dream of theirs. I remember when I got with an ex he'd just gone to join the Navy. He ended up dropping out a few months later when my Mother died as he didn't want to leave me (and he didn't enjoy the military life as much as he thought he would either). I remember when I got with him I was on board with the Navy thing, accepted it as part of the relationship and worth it to get to be with him. Looking back now, if he hadn't have left quickly, I know I'd have ended up ending it. During the first flush of infatuation it's easy to think it's worth it, it's easy to persuade yourself you can handle it, but as time progresses the realities of being in a relationship with somebody who is never there and who could be up to anything at any time sets in. For me it would have been essentially living a single life without the benefits of being able to meet someone else, and once life got hard and sht hit the fan, like losing my Mom, I know I'd have wanted a partner who could hold me through the night as I grieved, not somebody a phone call away or stuck under the ocean.

 

If it makes you feel any better I wouldn't be surprised if it crashes and burns and this is just infatuation, but you're better off without her. She obviously wasn't that into you anymore and you can do better. Leave her to it, block her on social media, delete her from your life and start to heal and move on. You'll look back when you're happy again and see that this is one of the best things that ever happened to you (I know it's impossible to believe right now, but from someone who's been there, I know it's coming for you). And in the meantime look after yourself, see your friends and family for support and make very sure not to have any contact with her or him.

 

supposedly they have been friends for awhile and have always wanted todate but it never worked out

[alexwood]

no replies?

[Zahara]

You were trying to cheat on her a couple of months ago so this works out for both of you. Now you can pursue other interests.

[lemonsugar]

You were trying to cheat on her a couple of months ago so this works out for both of you. Now you can pursue other interests.

Think the saying is what comes around goes around! Iif you wanted to cheat on her why do you care shes gone!

[WhatIsLove2014]

You were trying to cheat on her a couple of months ago so this works out for both of you. Now you can pursue other interests.

 

Yes, I agree. I have no sympathy for you.

[ExpatInItaly]

You were trying to cheat on her a couple of months ago so this works out for both of you. Now you can pursue other interests.

 

Exactly. This relationship wasn't going to work out, anyway.