Cristo Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 Well then at least I will never have to clean baby asses. That's the spirit. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 By being persistent, you are only telling her you don't respect her opinion and that she knows what she wants or doesn't want. She has already sensed that you are obsessed, and any woman with any common sense runs from that because you do not know this girl and she knows you do not really know her because you have no relationship and yet you are obsessed, so she knows you are delusional and obsessed with an image you have of her in your head which you have idealized by imaging that she IS the ideal woman in your head. She's not. No one is. Just because you want someone doesn't mean you're entitled to them. You are in love with love and that is all. The less you know about her, the more in love you'll be until you realize it's all in your head. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hawx79 Posted November 1, 2014 Author Share Posted November 1, 2014 By being persistent, you are only telling her you don't respect her opinion and that she knows what she wants or doesn't want. She has already sensed that you are obsessed, and any woman with any common sense runs from that because you do not know this girl and she knows you do not really know her because you have no relationship and yet you are obsessed, so she knows you are delusional and obsessed with an image you have of her in your head which you have idealized by imaging that she IS the ideal woman in your head. She's not. No one is. Just because you want someone doesn't mean you're entitled to them. You are in love with love and that is all. The less you know about her, the more in love you'll be until you realize it's all in your head. She is not an perfect image I am well aware, in fact, she smokes and her breath stinks a little and I noticed sometimes she lacks manners. But she makes me happy just by talking to me. I am willing to sacrifice a lot for being with her and I am willing to try all I can to make her happy. I want to help whenever she is in need and im saddened by the fact she lives in such a small apartment. I am also worried if she will manage to get a decent job and not struggle to be a single mom one day. I want to tell her if she ever makes up her mind she can contact me even if its in 5 years from now in whatever circumstances, I'll still be single then so I wont go anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
GG3 Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 How do you know this person? Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 She is not an perfect image I am well aware, in fact, she smokes and her breath stinks a little and I noticed sometimes she lacks manners. But she makes me happy just by talking to me. I am willing to sacrifice a lot for being with her and I am willing to try all I can to make her happy. I want to help whenever she is in need and im saddened by the fact she lives in such a small apartment. I am also worried if she will manage to get a decent job and not struggle to be a single mom one day. I want to tell her if she ever makes up her mind she can contact me even if its in 5 years from now in whatever circumstances, I'll still be single then so I wont go anyway. So you're waiting for her to have bad luck and get desperate enough that you hope she'll want you then? Meanwhile, she's going to get a boyfriend and then a husband and probably lead a happy life. The least attractive thing you can do is tell her you will be there no matter what. It's groveling, it's obsessive, it's delusional, and it's unwanted. If you cared about her in any real sense, you'd respect her wishes and leave her alone! Link to post Share on other sites
mortensorchid Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 Yes I can relate and feel sad for the man you were talking about. It's a real torment loving someone while not receiving it back. I'd like to share everything with her that I have and overload her with presents everyday. But the reason I cannot just forget her is that I have a past with her that no other woman can replace. Not only in my eyes is she the most beautiful woman in the world but she had been so kind to me and lifted me up whenever I needed it and I wish I could be with her more. I don't want to be considered a stalker, so Ill just say it to her if she doesn't want to see me again, then I won't. Guy, I have some news for you: That man who I referenced in the story said the same thing you are/did. He also said (after dumping me, I would like to add, because he was a born again Christian and said that my and his having sex was wrong and then when I said alright then we don't have to have sex if you truly feel it's wrong then he decided that we were just friends, I would like to add) that he would never marry. Barely a year later, he met and married another woman and they have been married for nearly 15 years last I heard. And I am here to tell you that you will also be in said position. I am not calling you a sniveling, cowardly hypocrite who hides behind his situational ethics like I would call him, please understand that. The point is that you too can move on from this and you WILL move on from this. Life GOES ON WITH OR WITHOUT THIS WOMAN IN THE PICTURE. AND IF YOU CHOOSE TO LAY DOWN AND DIE OVER SOMEONE WHO NO LONGER WISHES TO HAVE CONTACT WITH YOU FOR WHATEVER REASON, you are a fool. And you look like a fool to others. Fact. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GG3 Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 I'm concerned that this is someone at work. If so, you could get in trouble for harrassment. Link to post Share on other sites
Cristo Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 She is not an perfect image I am well aware, in fact, she smokes and her breath stinks a little and I noticed sometimes she lacks manners. But she makes me happy just by talking to me. I am willing to sacrifice a lot for being with her and I am willing to try all I can to make her happy. I want to help whenever she is in need and im saddened by the fact she lives in such a small apartment. I am also worried if she will manage to get a decent job and not struggle to be a single mom one day. I want to tell her if she ever makes up her mind she can contact me even if its in 5 years from now in whatever circumstances, I'll still be single then so I wont go anyway. Seriously? I really hope this is a joke. So you're saying she's rude, smokes, is a single mom, and doesn't have a job? Stop chasing this girl, man. She doesn't even sound like she's remotely high quality. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hawx79 Posted November 1, 2014 Author Share Posted November 1, 2014 So you're waiting for her to have bad luck and get desperate enough that you hope she'll want you then? Meanwhile, she's going to get a boyfriend and then a husband and probably lead a happy life. The least attractive thing you can do is tell her you will be there no matter what. It's groveling, it's obsessive, it's delusional, and it's unwanted. If you cared about her in any real sense, you'd respect her wishes and leave her alone! I do hope she gets lucky and marries someone good, but for me, I got nothing else in store. No other woman can ever love me nor am I attracted to anyone else. And if that makes me sound like a stalker, then so be it! Its not like im going to chase after her. I DO RESPECT HER, but I need my say as well because she will remain in my heart always! Guy, I have some news for you: That man who I referenced in the story said the same thing you are/did. He also said (after dumping me, I would like to add, because he was a born again Christian and said that my and his having sex was wrong and then when I said alright then we don't have to have sex if you truly feel it's wrong then he decided that we were just friends, I would like to add) that he would never marry. Barely a year later, he met and married another woman and they have been married for nearly 15 years last I heard. And I am here to tell you that you will also be in said position. I am not calling you a sniveling, cowardly hypocrite who hides behind his situational ethics like I would call him, please understand that. The point is that you too can move on from this and you WILL move on from this. Life GOES ON WITH OR WITHOUT THIS WOMAN IN THE PICTURE. AND IF YOU CHOOSE TO LAY DOWN AND DIE OVER SOMEONE WHO NO LONGER WISHES TO HAVE CONTACT WITH YOU FOR WHATEVER REASON, you are a fool. And you look like a fool to others. Fact. Im happy for him and I wish I could have shared the same faith as him, but I know for a fact Ill remain single forever if she rejects me. As I said above, no other woman can ever love me nor am I attracted to anyone else, so I got no choice. It is a act of desperation, but she will probably lead a better life then me anyways. And if I had a chance to be happier with her even if its a slight of chance Ill grab it in a heartbeat! You may think im a fool but I have no more doubt doing this. I will try to tell her gently and respectfully as I can, so I don't see any harm in it. If anyone is about to get harmed it will be me in more then heartaches. I could not live with myself if I didn't take the opportunity to tell her these things I want to, I'd always look over my shoulders back my whole life if I don't. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hawx79 Posted November 1, 2014 Author Share Posted November 1, 2014 Seriously? I really hope this is a joke. So you're saying she's rude, smokes, is a single mom, and doesn't have a job? Stop chasing this girl, man. She doesn't even sound like she's remotely high quality. No she is not a mom nor has children. She is nice and polite most of the time, but sometimes she forgets due to her living style. She is student of 24 in her last year living with several students under a roof. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 So what's so wrong with you that you are sure no woman can ever love you? And if that's true, why do you think she's the exception when she's told you no? Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted November 1, 2014 Share Posted November 1, 2014 I understand but its I really need to tell her couple few things I feel for her, if she still sais no after this, I'd accept it. She means the world to me. She said no the first time in a polite way but I didn't really had the chance yet to connect with her. I'm afraid this time she might throw me to the ground instead of laying gently me like she did first time. I feel I just wont be able to continue if I don't try one more time. do not pin all your hopes on the breast of another, not able to continue after no is a problem my brother, keep your hopes for you and for now, undercover, life isnt about having all yeses which you have to discover, life happens when you bounce back and recover.......best wishes....deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author hawx79 Posted November 1, 2014 Author Share Posted November 1, 2014 So what's so wrong with you that you are sure no woman can ever love you? And if that's true, why do you think she's the exception when she's told you no? No girl and as beautiful as her ever treated and talked to me so nicely as she did while I was feeling down, she touched my soul. I believe she can be like that again if she knows how much I care and love about her. Link to post Share on other sites
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