40 Fonzarelli Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 If I ask her out and she gives me some lame excuse without offering an alternative time, then I definitely move on. I might just text her "Ok, let me know when you are free." But after watching this clip below, it seems to have worked out. How common is this? I am just wondering if I am giving up too soon. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 If I ask her out and she gives me some lame excuse without offering an alternative time, then I definitely move on. I might just text her "Ok, let me know when you are free." But after watching this clip below, it seems to have worked out. How common is this? I am just wondering if I am giving up too soon. I do not play games. If I am interested, they know it. If you are interested enough in this woman, date others until it becomes clear to you that she is interested. Any maybe by that time, you will be more interested in someone else anyway. If not and she re-surfaces, go out with her. Nothing to lose. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Some people do play games. They want you to chase them. I never did that. I would play games with myself if I was interested . . . like waiting some period of time before calling back if I missed a call so as not to seem overly eager / clingy. But I never pretended to be aloof just to see if I could get attention. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 The video is about playing games. If she is mature, she will say she is not interested in a date with you. If she is mature, she will accept the date with you to give/get the opportunity to know whether or not she is really interested. It doesn't matter if there's another guy she's really interested in and "waiting for" . . . she's in a holding pattern for him or he's got her on hold in some way! Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGypsy Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 If I'm interested in a man , he is not going to have any doubts about how I feel. That's how I expect to be treated in return . 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Let me be perfectly straight up about a situation I was in at one time . . . there was a man who asked me for a date. I didn't accept. It was at a time when I was feeling low and hadn't had many offers for dates but had one man I was hoping would ask me. That didn't happen. I called the first guy about two weeks later only because I was lonely. He didn't return my call. After that, I looked deeper and realized "where I was" and I really had no business dating anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 I don't play games. Mostly because I don't see how it would benefit me, seems really complicated and like hard work, and really I don't even know how. I like things to be simple. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
soph-walker Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Some people do play games. They want you to chase them. I never did that. I would play games with myself if I was interested . . . like waiting some period of time before calling back if I missed a call so as not to seem overly eager / clingy. But I never pretended to be aloof just to see if I could get attention. Ha, yes! I have kept my keenness in check before, but not because I wanted to make him wait, just to have some self respect and not be hanging on the phone. If I like a guy, I won't play games. I'll be open (within reason) and receptive to invitation. Hope this helps? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Underthebodhitree Posted October 29, 2014 Share Posted October 29, 2014 Another non-game player. I know pretty much after 1-2 dates if it's going to work. If I know it won't work, I let him know. If I think it will work - I'm an adult. If I want to hang out, I hang out. I'm 36 with kids I have 95% of the time and a job, so my limited schedule is legit lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mister Zen Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 I've never met a woman who doesn't play games. The degree of participation in games varies from woman to woman, but they all play them (or have played them). The people who claim to not play games play them the most. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
green_tea Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 I've never met a woman who doesn't play games. The degree of participation in games varies from woman to woman, but they all play them (or have played them). The people who claim to not play games play them the most. What do you define as 'games'? I think you're probably mistaking women being confused by male behaviour with game playing. Right now I'm very interested in a guy, but having trouble gauging his interest and so I've kind of retreated a bit back into my shell after giving him what I thought were quite obvious signs that I was interested. I'm not playing games and never do when I like someone. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 If I'm interested in a man , he is not going to have any doubts about how I feel. That's how I expect to be treated in return . Thank you... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 Ha, yes! I have kept my keenness in check before, but not because I wanted to make him wait, just to have some self respect and not be hanging on the phone. If I like a guy, I won't play games. I'll be open (within reason) and receptive to invitation. Hope this helps? Exactly.... If it relates to the OP's situation, I turned down a hook-up with a crush, but I returned with a date and time. I also asked him if that day would work for him. No "maybes" here. No game playing. Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 There are times I have been tempted to play games, but never have. I have other things to do with my time. Plus I wouldn't want it done to me. OTOH, it is pretty much a given that lots of guys will try to play games... PUA behavior being all the rage in some circles. That, and men generally having few consequences for being a liar and womanizer. There always seems to be some poor woman with low self esteem letting a guy play games with her... Link to post Share on other sites
maysj18 Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 Nope. If I'm interested, I will tell him. If I want to text him, I'll text him. If I want to call, I'll call. I just don't see the point in not being direct and honest. I won't chase anyone though nor would I ever want someone to feel like they need to chase after me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 I've never met a woman who doesn't play games. The degree of participation in games varies from woman to woman, but they all play them (or have played them). The people who claim to not play games play them the most. Then you have not met a real woman. You are meeting girls in women's bodies maybe. There are tons of them for sure. I promise you, when you meet a real woman, there will be no games, no guessing, no assuming about anything. If you meet "the" woman, you will know it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
IronZ Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 I don't play games. Mostly because I don't see how it would benefit me, seems really complicated and like hard work, and really I don't even know how. I like things to be simple. Too bad there aren't more girls like you. A lot of girls like to be complicated. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted October 30, 2014 Share Posted October 30, 2014 Too bad there aren't more girls like you. A lot of girls like to be complicated. Complicated is tiring. Makes my head hurt lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint Posted October 31, 2014 Share Posted October 31, 2014 I watched the entire video. Wow was that girl a game-playing flake. I commend the guy for having such patience. I also enjoyed hearing how direct the guy was. I wouldn't call that "alpha male" quality, just a confident man that knows what he wants. He stuck to his objective, which was to have a date with the woman. I personally would of passed on the chick after her immature response and avoiding answering the question for a date. That's a clear indicator that she is immature, a flake, and plays games. The funny thing about the story, the guy just wanted a date. The woman wanted to have sex. She gave it up on the first date. I would love to know the aftermath and how much he really respects her overall between the bullsh*it and her giving in to lust so quickly. Link to post Share on other sites
most_distant_galaxy Posted October 31, 2014 Share Posted October 31, 2014 No I don't play games. The only way to know if someone genuinely likes me for me, is to be my usual self. If he loses respect for me (even in the slightest) because I show I'm into him, then it's not working for me. It's a fast way to sort out the men who like the idea of me from the men who like me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tayken Posted October 31, 2014 Share Posted October 31, 2014 If he loses respect for me (even in the slightest) because I show I'm into him, then it's not working for me. Are we talking giving it up on first date here? You can see how a guy can lose respect for a woman by doing this though can't you? We are all humans, and one has to think perhaps this is standard procedure for the woman with all her dates. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted October 31, 2014 Share Posted October 31, 2014 There is only 1 game I play when I am interested... ...its called strip poker ... I suspect that is not the sort of game you are talking about though and it is certainly not playing in public! Link to post Share on other sites
most_distant_galaxy Posted October 31, 2014 Share Posted October 31, 2014 Are we talking giving it up on first date here? You can see how a guy can lose respect for a woman by doing this though can't you? We are all humans, and one has to think perhaps this is standard procedure for the woman with all her dates. Who says that? Mom? Or the chauvinist encyclopedia? I personally disrespect people when they are rude, or devious, or when they don't think for their selves and according to circumstances. I don't disrespect people because they have sex when they feel like it. That's messed up! If someone disrespects me because of this, then they disrespect people too easily and I don't want them. edit: I haven't "gave it up" on the first date, even though I could see that happen with certain really attractive people. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayken Posted October 31, 2014 Share Posted October 31, 2014 Who says that? Mom? Or the chauvinist encyclopedia? I personally disrespect people when they are rude, or devious, or when they don't think for their selves and according to circumstances. I don't disrespect people because they have sex when they feel like it. That's messed up! If someone disrespects me because of this, then they disrespect people too easily and I don't want them. edit: I haven't "gave it up" on the first date, even though I could see that happen with certain really attractive people. Bold 1: Am sure that didn't come out the way you meant it? Bold 2: You are proud to admit this on a public forum, even if the person is an ex con, abuser, drug user, child molester? Looks will make the pants drop on a first date. Hmmmm 1 Link to post Share on other sites
most_distant_galaxy Posted October 31, 2014 Share Posted October 31, 2014 Bold 2: You are proud to admit this on a public forum, even if the person is an ex con, abuser, drug user, child molester? Looks will make the pants drop on a first date. Hmmmm I don't go on dates with strangers. I date people who I know beforehand (or my friends know beforehand). The person who came to mind first is someone I used to interact with almost daily, but I never went on a date with. Yes, I would sleep with him on the first date because he is wonderful. Link to post Share on other sites
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