Itspointless Posted October 26, 2014 Share Posted October 26, 2014 I don't think he will end up with me. I have come to that awareness. I do think he has self esteem issues though many people would disagree with that. If you met him, you would not think he had self esteem issues but deep down I think (and he would admit) he is very insecure. In our relationship, he wasn't codependent. I believe because he never committed to our relationship. In his previous two long term relationships I believe he was codependent from what I have read here. Between him and me, I would probably be the one that appeared codependent. I would do anything to make him happy. You could be right I don't know the guy You know - definitely not saying he is - but deep down also narcissistic people are very very insecure. That leaves us with the insight about you. I hope you will take that insight to a further level. It is easy said, I am still struggling getting rid of the images that my ex - who I met last year - was everything I ever hoped for. And in all honesty with al her weaknesses she was, but only after a short time it became clear that she couldn't be who she wanted to be herself. In part this was because she got ill and more importantly because of the way she deals with fear and stress. She told me it was normal for her to do it that way. That last insight taught me that we never will be in a mentally healthy way. I don't know why some people never encounter these sort of things, but we have to live and deal with it and try to learn what we can from these events. heartbreaking isn't it? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jet Lag Posted October 26, 2014 Author Share Posted October 26, 2014 You could be right I don't know the guy You know - definitely not saying he is - but deep down also narcissistic people are very very insecure. That leaves us with the insight about you. I hope you will take that insight to a further level. It is easy said, I am still struggling getting rid of the images that my ex - who I met last year - was everything I ever hoped for. And in all honesty with al her weaknesses she was, but only after a short time it became clear that she couldn't be who she wanted to be herself. In part this was because she got ill and more importantly because of the way she deals with fear and stress. She told me it was normal for her to do it that way. That last insight taught me that we never will be in a mentally healthy way. I don't know why some people never encounter these sort of things, but we have to live and deal with it and try to learn what we can from these events. heartbreaking isn't it? I know I was totally different in this relationship than I ever have been before...but I also loved him much more. I guess I took away his ability to love me because he shows love by "doing" yet I never allowed him to do anything for me because I was so busy doing stuff from him, making his life easier, taking away any stress. Doh. Link to post Share on other sites
Itspointless Posted October 26, 2014 Share Posted October 26, 2014 I guess I took away his ability to love me because he shows love by "doing" yet I never allowed him to do anything for me because I was so busy doing stuff from him, making his life easier, taking away any stress. Doh. I am not so sure that is the case, as he is still letting you do things for him. Link to post Share on other sites
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