He doesn't buy me flowers...why?

[Adam]

Well, do you buy him flowers? Most girls who complain "he never buys me flowers" don't do anything similar for the guy. Why is that?

[Adam]

Hmm, looks like my previous post didn't appear...

 

How come women frequently accuse their boyfriends of being cheap, and yet, never buy anything for their boyfriends? How come women never buy men flowers, and then complain that men never buy them flowers? It is clearly hypocritical... doesn't the man's feelings matter also?

[moimeme]

I think women actually don't think men have feelings. No really. I even asked someone I work with and she said she never thought her husband did. Oh, sure, anger maybe, but a need for appreciation - no way.

[GirlDown]

i think things like flowers (maybe not necessarily flowers) are important because it lets you know that the person was thinking of you when you weren't around.

 

i know when my boyfriend says to my face "i thought about you all day and i couldn't wait to see you" i melt. i really do. and it's nice to hear.

 

sometimes he'll bring me flowers, or he'll put them in a vase on his table so i see them when i come over. most of the time, it seems like he's more excited to give them to me than i am to get them...he sits there expectantly and if they aren't the first thing i see he points shyly and says "look..." like he just can't wait. it's the cutest thing.

 

but it doesn't have to be flowers to do that...he'll send me text messages if he can't talk at work that say nice things, sometimes goofy things, or inside jokes, anything.

 

and both are equally as nice to receive because, as i said, it feels really good to know you are on his mind even if you're not right in front of his face.

 

 

i think it's a healthy thing to do...for both of you. no one enjoys the mundane, and life is still short to dwell only in boredom and the "why should i because everything dies" attitude.

[GirlDown]

Originally posted by Adam

Hmm, looks like my previous post didn't appear...

 

How come women frequently accuse their boyfriends of being cheap, and yet, never buy anything for their boyfriends? How come women never buy men flowers, and then complain that men never buy them flowers? It is clearly hypocritical... doesn't the man's feelings matter also?

 

 

well...i buy my boyfriend stuff...

 

if i know there's a video game, or a dvd, or something cool for his computer that i know he wants or whatever i surprise him with it. i love doing that kind of stuff...

 

but i think he might be like "um, thanks for the flowers...but i'm not a girl."

 

well, okay, he wouldn't be a jerk about it, but i know he would maybe think..."hmmm, why flowers? i'm a guy"

[Anais]

Originally posted by Moka_maverick

Why don't some guys buy flowers for their girlfriend?

 

I have been dating this guy for over a year and he has yet to buy me flowers. I have mentioned it to him, but he hasn't done it. It is lame. Just makes me wonder if he is too lazy to show gratitude. And yes, there are other ways to show appreciation, and I don't expect him to buy them for me all the time, but surprise me for christ's sake. And they could be picked off the side of the road - it isn't like I expect a $80 bouquet - the amt he spends isn't the issue; it is the fact that the gesture has never occurred to him.

 

He is generous with other things, like his time, and he always makes me great dinners, and plans on taking me on a hiking trip for my upcoming bday, so maybe he shows gratitude in other ways, but if he wanted me to do something for him, I would.

 

What do you guys think? Is he just frickin' lazy, or honestly clueless?

Did he ever explain you why he doesn’t buy you flowers? Like you asked: Honey I am just curios why you never buy me flowers?

 

You will get a strait forward answer I think. Men are more simple than we think.

 

Like I asked hubbie:

 

Honey when we met you still had ex's photo in you valet, but you never have mine with you: why is it so? (One of my PMS days when I am out of my mind I asked him this )

 

Here is what he told me:

 

You know you are in my heart and mind every second so I don’t need you in my valet. And I had ex’s pic when we met because she put it there when we were still married and it was just left there because I didn’t give it any importance to remember about it and take it out.

 

 

It was kind of cute when I saw him cutting my pics recently and putting it in his valet by his own.

 

I also asked him once:

 

Honey, you buy me flowers so often but you told me you never bought ex any single time during 10 years of marriage, why? (I know, I know it is bad to ask but sometimes I am too curios and out of my mind. )

 

He said he never felt she loved to get flowers as she mentioned once that she is sad when the flowers die.

 

So yes men are simple and strait forward.

[Podna]

Flowers make me sneeze.

 

If a girl asked me for flowers then I would get them for her… I would be doing it because it was expected, which carries no feelings except obligation. Some guys (like me) would rather use the money for something more practical than flowers, but from time to time I still buy them just for surprise.

[clynn]

podna, you still buy them from time to time for a surprise, taht's nice.

 

I bought my boyfriend flowers on occasion. I did it and other out of the blue nice little things because I was thinking about him.

 

So, it was kind of about the flowers. However, it was also about other things. The fact that he never really did ANYTHING nice and out of the blue or spontaneous for me. For christmas and bday, yes. But I always thought of nice stuff to do day to day, little things, gifts or just, oh i cut this article out of the paper for you, that sort of thing.

 

He wasn't that way. Ever.