Oh lord! A former co-worker brought her baby in for show and tell...

[veggirl]

ugh at my old job, the owners daughter had custody of her toddler nephew and he was in the office ALL.THE.TIME. yes we were expected to fawn over him, what else are you gonna do when she's all like "omg isn't he SO cute!!!" and "sing for them!!" and all that s.hit? god it was sooo annoying, half the time she'd disappear and we'd be babysitting a 3 yr old and trying to keep him from drawing on the walls.

 

personal life needs to stay at home, idk if I'm just a meany but I really don't care at all about my co-workers kids. i also find it annoying when they bust out their cell phones to show you a pic of the kid like with spaghetti sauce on his face or something.

 

although, tbh, if i liked the co-worker i might have been more okay with the whole thing.

[WrinkledForehead]

Don't you hate when people show off their baby and it's ugly? And instead of lying you just say "look at the baby!"?

 

Me too.

 

In the past once, in an ugly baby scenario, I said, "she looks just like you!" Which she did, the poor thing. :/

[WrinkledForehead]

Just say 'ah it is so cute I could eat it'. Than eat it since you were about to go for lunch anyway. Babies are super fresh and full of protein so very healthy. And you can totally get away with it pleading insanity.

 

This reply made me extremely happy.

[SJS]

I never minded when others brought their baby(ies) in. It broke up the day. What annoyed the **** out of me is when they want you to hold it, and push and push and push. I don't want to hold it, I'm fine looking at it from a distance!

 

 

And then when the tables turned and I brought MY baby in, I didn't want anyone to hold her and just wanted them to look from a distance. lol

[preraph]

^ I have found that if you just honestly tell them you always feel like you're going to drop them, they stop bugging you to hold them. And wisely, not all mothers even want people touching their babies these days -- but the ones who do are just awfully presumptuous assuming you'd want to.

[Maleficent]

I don't. I recognise that some people like it and some people dislike it. It's the expectation that you should like what a lot of the others do. Why? Just because we share the same breathing space at work? What else? Discuss their marriage problems too? People have the right to be left alone at work and not pretend to be all matey.

 

And I wish not to share it, I don't care the slightest about babies and children in general. The mothers' desires don't come above mine just because they are mothers. Some mothers I work with never bring their kids in and don't expect current or former co-workers pretend they care. That's because they don't expect every single person around to share their pride and joy. People have their lives, they don't have to give a damn about yours. When you have children one day I can assure you most people will not care the slightest about them.

 

You don't have to sympathise, people can choose to agree or disagree, but to call that emotionally unhealthy just because you don't sympathise seems like you overestimate the value of your own opinion. The same way some mothers overestimate how much others care about their children.

 

Just because you don't give a damn about other people's babies doesn't mean everyone else does/should.

 

Also, your co-workers are the people you spend the most time with outside of your partner/immediate family. They are practically there for the entire time of the pregnancy so I think it's normal they'd want to see the baby once it's born.

 

The issue here is that OP seems overly affected by this visit. I agree with OwMyEyeball. This doesn't seem like an emotionally healthy way to be upset about this sort of thing.

 

It's ok to not care about other people's babies, but it's not necessary to make a big case out of it either.

Or idk, maybe some people should get jobs that allow them to work in a dark, lonely corner of the office or from home?

lol

[Maleficent]

I never minded when others brought their baby(ies) in. It broke up the day. What annoyed the **** out of me is when they want you to hold it, and push and push and push. I don't want to hold it, I'm fine looking at it from a distance!

 

 

And then when the tables turned and I brought MY baby in, I didn't want anyone to hold her and just wanted them to look from a distance. lol

 

I have honestly never seen a mother insist on having me (or anyone else for that matter) hold their baby. It usually goes

her: do you want to hold her/him?

Me: oh, no thanks.

 

end of story.

[Emilia]

Just because you don't give a damn about other people's babies doesn't mean everyone else does/should.

 

Also, your co-workers are the people you spend the most time with outside of your partner/immediate family. They are practically there for the entire time of the pregnancy so I think it's normal they'd want to see the baby once it's born.

 

The issue here is that OP seems overly affected by this visit. I agree with OwMyEyeball. This doesn't seem like an emotionally healthy way to be upset about this sort of thing.

 

It's ok to not care about other people's babies, but it's not necessary to make a big case out of it either.

Or idk, maybe some people should get jobs that allow them to work in a dark, lonely corner of the office or from home?

lol

So you are making the case that you are so much more emotionally healthy because you care about your coworkers' kids yet you stoop to personal attacks towards people who don't agree with you.

 

No-one that agreed with the OP resorted to offensive comments about their fellow posters, yet you and two others on this thread think it's perfectly acceptable to offend strangers over different views.

 

But that's fine because you love babies, right? Just who is emotionally unhealthy here, hm?

[Emilia]

I have honestly never seen a mother insist on having me (or anyone else for that matter) hold their baby. It usually goes

her: do you want to hold her/him?

Me: oh, no thanks.

 

end of story.

Yes, it's perfectly clear that other people aren't allowed to have different experiences and views from yours. Got that, thanks.

[Maleficent]

So you are making the case that you are so much more emotionally healthy because you care about your coworkers' kids yet you stoop to personal attacks towards people who don't agree with you.

 

No-one that agreed with the OP resorted to offensive comments about their fellow posters, yet you and two others on this thread think it's perfectly acceptable to offend strangers over different views.

 

But that's fine because you love babies, right? Just who is emotionally unhealthy here, hm?

 

 

I did not say I was more emotionally healthy than anyone. I said I agreed with OwMyEye's opinion that it didn't seem like an emotionally healthy way to deal with the situation. I didn't even imply OP was emotionally unhealthy.

 

As far as personal attack, I changed the end of my post to make sure there was no 'you' so it didn't come off as a personal attack, because it wasn't. Some people really are better off not working in open environments, for various reasons.

 

I also never said I loved babies.

 

I hope you can at least appreciate the irony of your last two posts...

[SJS]

I have honestly never seen a mother insist on having me (or anyone else for that matter) hold their baby. It usually goes

her: do you want to hold her/him?

Me: oh, no thanks.

 

end of story.

I wish it had been that easy! I worked with some pushy women who thought I'd want 10 of my own after holding their precious baby....

lol

[Maleficent]

I wish it had been that easy! I worked with some pushy women who thought I'd want 10 of my own after holding their precious baby....

lol

 

Yeah I imagine those are annoying as f*ck. lol

[Almond_Joy]

Babies make me really nervous....I just dont have experience with them and everyone makes such a big deal out of them.

 

I get really uncomfortable when people bring their children to work.....I give the happy welcom the old college try but it feels and probably looks very put on lol.

 

I agree with the poster that mentioned folks bringing em to the office. That's the worst! Cuz like they said, nowhere to go. Or you basically have to find somewhere to hide until they leave. :-/

[stillafool]

I don't have kids but actually seeing a new baby kinda brightens my day.

[xxoo]

This thread cracks me up.

 

I currently have a gift on my desk for a coworker who we expect to drop by with her new baby any day now everyone is bugging her to come in already. Well, probably not everyone, but plenty of us!

[Elias33]

.... or maybe people wrongly assume that everyone likes what they like

 

It's not about assumptions. A person is willing to share something joyful with others. Of course, not everyone would consider this joyful, as we all have our opinions. I get it. But it's how you act upon whatever comes in your mind that makes the difference. If babies bother you, if you let that bother you, rather, then it may be time to do some self examination.

 

To dislike an event is a different thing than to let it bother you, especially if we're talking babies here. I hate weddings, I dislike them, but I don't let it bother me. Why should I? Consideration towards others should always trump ones inability to practice self-discipline. It's called being nice, its very healthy.

[almond]

People are getting quite riled up...lol. It's nice to see a lively thread

 

This former co-worker who is good friends with a current co-worker brought her baby in for show and tell. She doesn't even work here anymore and I've never even talked to her/not even friends with her, so as soon as I saw her in the another row, I immediately got up and went to lunch. Geez...what is the deal here?

 

What is the deal here? Well OP, it's quite simple. As you state, this woman is good friends with people in your workplace. She was likely invited and encouraged to bring the baby for a visit, as lots of people like this - a birth is a happy occasion, and many women love a visit from a baby and a happy new mum, especially when they are good friends.

 

You've never even talked to this woman. She was visiting people in a different "row." No one even approached you or spoke to you, and it doesn't seem like they were going to.

 

Why were you so bothered by this? You had to stand up and leave the premises? You seem disgusted by this...and felt the need to start a thread about it - it really didn't have anything to do with you though? Why did this impact you so much?

 

In my opinion, your reaction seems to be quite extreme and negative.

[preraph]

In a related story, though I'm not saying all children visitors to offices are "running wild" and/or "disruptive," though in my experience they have been:

 

 

from Fox:

"A recent Harris Poll that surveyed 2,000 adults has revealed the No. 1 pet peeve of Americans: parents who let their disruptive children run wild."

 

"In one of the most decisive responses of the poll, a vast majority of Americans say they're most annoyed by parents letting their children run wild or be disruptive in public places (86%)."

 

http://www.myfoxdc.com/story/25448232/americas-pet-peeves-what-annoys-you

[MissBee]

Based on other threads, it seems you really have a problem with babies and marriages, like it REALLY bothers you when your coworkers discuss their upcoming nuptials or bring in their kids to meet other coworkers. Perhaps you should explore why this perturbs you so much.

 

If she didn't bring the baby to you but perhaps to meet other coworkers who are friends of hers, then I don't see why it bothers you so much. You of course had every right to choose not to be around but it's kind of weird that you are so bothered by this. Was the child misbehaving or disrupting the office?

 

I worked in an office once where this woman brought in a puppy for show and tell and it was the strangest thing to me. Mainly because there was an assumption that everyone likes dogs so she had this puppy running wild around the office and I had my purse on the floor and the dog was rummaging through it and she didn't say a thing...I felt it was totally inappropriate. Also it was a culture shock to me because where I'm from it is unheard of that people would bring any kind of animal to their place of work. So that was my own bias, where I understand bringing a baby in more so than a puppy.

[stillafool]

In a related story, though I'm not saying all children visitors to offices are "running wild" and/or "disruptive," though in my experience they have been:

 

 

from Fox:

"A recent Harris Poll that surveyed 2,000 adults has revealed the No. 1 pet peeve of Americans: parents who let their disruptive children run wild."

 

"In one of the most decisive responses of the poll, a vast majority of Americans say they're most annoyed by parents letting their children run wild or be disruptive in public places (86%)."

 

America's pet peeves: what annoys you? - DC News FOX 5 DC WTTG

 

Okay, but a newborn isn't going to run amuck in the office.

[preraph]

^No, but they usually cry and carry on. People in an office are on the phone and stuff. My office isn't like a retail establishment. You need to be able to hear and work.

[xxoo]

In a related story, though I'm not saying all children visitors to offices are "running wild" and/or "disruptive," though in my experience they have been:

 

 

from Fox:

"A recent Harris Poll that surveyed 2,000 adults has revealed the No. 1 pet peeve of Americans: parents who let their disruptive children run wild."

 

"In one of the most decisive responses of the poll, a vast majority of Americans say they're most annoyed by parents letting their children run wild or be disruptive in public places (86%)."

 

America's pet peeves: what annoys you? - DC News FOX 5 DC WTTG

 

Ironically, these adults are likely former children who ran far more wild than modern kids. We were a feral pack of neighborhood kids (I can still remember the old guy complaining about his rose bushes ). My young kids never left their own yard without supervision.

[preraph]

My generation kids weren't allowed to be loud in public or they didn't go in public where it would bother people. Maitre d's at restaurants would offer to take any crying child or baby "to the lounge," which was a hint for the mother to do it herself, but mostly kids didn't go to nice restaurants at all. People hired a sitter. Kids went to burger places mostly. Kids were waaaay better behaved the farther back you go in generations, plus they had more freedom as far as playing outside.

[Maleficent]

^No, but they usually cry and carry on. People in an office are on the phone and stuff. My office isn't like a retail establishment. You need to be able to hear and work.

 

When they cry it's usually a matter of changing their diaper or feeding them. They don't throw anger tantrum just cause.

The rest of the time, they sleep.

 

It's not like these visits last long enough to actually keep you from working for a long period of time anyway...

[Quiet Storm]

I think our culture may also influence this. "Americans love babies" is commonly mentioned when people describe the differences between the British and Americans. Visitors often say us Americans fawn over babies in public, and appreciate babies more, in general.

 

My son is taking a trip to UK and we were reading up on the cultural differences.

 

For example, see #7

10 Things Londoners Can Learn From New Yorkers | Mind The Gap | BBC America

 

Americans Love Children

 

8 Reasons to Raise British Children in America | Mind The Gap | BBC America

 

http://www.bbcamerica.com/mind-the-gap/2013/01/17/love-me-love-my-child/

 

I love babies and having them around makes me smile.

Edited September 23, 2014 by Quiet Storm