Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 I met her over a month ago, she is studying in an accelerated program to be a registered nurse. We texted each other for 2 weeks before we went on our first date and she seemed great in communication. She even made sure that she's not standing me up when she's almost late coming to see me. The date went amazing I thought. We barely ate and didn't realize we just talked for almost 4 hours. The next day she texted me saying she thought a lot about me. She reached out to me first! wow. I felt that she and I were in the same wave length and I really like her. I asked her out again for the following weekend, but she said that she has tests, state exams and projects and told me that she'll make it up. She also said that "she's overwhelmed with school" . So for 2 weeks, we couldn't meet but we've been texting each other and I was sending her texts every 2-3 days just to let her know I think about her and I am supporting her. Now here's where it starts to be a little weird for me. The day after her exams are over, I asked her out again. NO REPLY. So I waited 10 days and just called her to see if she's doing ok. She txt me in the morning the next day apologizing saying she's been very busy and distracted and asked me if she could call me the next day. I said yes in a very nice way. She never called me. ======================= 1. Is she starting to reject me even after all the consistent highs and attractions we show each other? (Attraction has an expiracy date)? 2. I don't know how busy and difficult a nursing school can be, but wouldn't a person still find the time to at least meet for coffee no matter how busy they are, specially after almost a month? I work a lot, but I always find time for that 1 person I care for. 3. I don't know what to do at this point. Move on? Wait for her? If she's not interested in me, I'd rather hear it straight so I don't wonder and I can just move on.
HappyLove Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 She's not starting to reject you... She is rejecting you. Sorry, some people are spineless and can't just say thanks but I'm not interested. She's showing by her ACTIONS that she's not interested. Move on.
doeblin Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 I work a lot, but I always find time for that 1 person I care for. Exactly. Do you think if Ryan Gosling called her she would have said she is too busy for the next few weeks? Wait a week, send her another text, but nothing needy or clingy! Just something funny or random, and see how she responds. But I think you should move on or at least date other girls. If she's not interested in me, I'd rather hear it straight Not likely to happen, unless you force her in a corner. You don't want to do that. No response communicates enough for you to move on. 1
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 So a woman can go from 100% attracted to you and then all of a sudden, just drops and rejects you?
doeblin Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 So a woman can go from 100% attracted to you and then all of a sudden, just drops and rejects you? Or she was 60% attracted to you, then she found someone she's 80% attracted to. You'll probably never know. I'm not saying to give up yet.. but PROBABLY she isn't interested anymore. 1
Jules Dash Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 She is rejecting you. Don't get thrown off by the hot periods and the excitement she displayed on 1 or 2 dates. It does not mean much. Some women seem to want the connection to happen and seem to convince themselves that it is happening but when they think about it a little bit more, they realize that it wasn't really happening for them. Form what I learned, the only thing you can count on is time. If she is dating you 3 months or so later, that is a good sign.
Mike B. Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Or she was 60% attracted to you, then she found someone she's 80% attracted to. You'll probably never know. I'm not saying to give up yet.. but PROBABLY she isn't interested anymore. I didn't know that attraction came with numerical values but I want to trust you on this one.
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 I think I remember now why I didn't trust women and I didn't like opening up. She didn't seem to be the type to do such thing and I wanted to believe it too, since my female friends told me to wait and not worry because she seems solid
Mike B. Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 I think I remember now why I didn't trust women and I didn't like opening up. This could be your problem. 1
doeblin Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 I think I remember now why I didn't trust women and I didn't like opening up. Now, now... this kind of stuff happens to everyone. It's not like she cheated you out of money, right? You went on date, and she is not that into you. So what? Onto the next one. BTW, that's why you should date multiple women until you find someone to be exclusive with, so you don't get hung up on rejection. 1
mightycpa Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Too bad. Nurses are among the best. They see all that pain and misery and death every day, and they compensate for that in their relationships. Sex especially, because they know where to touch. Oh well.
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 Its hard to believe that after a great date and 2 weeks of communication that shows attraction , that she's not interested. Even my female friends all agree with the above.
mightycpa Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Its hard to believe that after a great date and 2 weeks of communication that shows attraction , that she's not interested. Even my female friends all agree with the above. Ah, Denial. More than just a river in Egypt. Or is that Ego? I can't recall. Would it be any more believable to you if you knew she was also out with another guy on separate nights, and had an even better time with him, and then decided? If you were writing a book, and you were the main character, I'd bet you could come up with dozens of scenarios that would be believable. You just have to believe what your ears and eyes tell you, that's all.
Jules Dash Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 [Too bad. Nurses are among the best. They see all that pain and misery and death every day, and they compensate for that in their relationships. Sex especially, because they know where to touch. Really? Female cop comes to mind. Its hard to believe that after a great date and 2 weeks of communication that shows attraction , that she's not interested. Even my female friends all agree with the above. I don't know you or your female friends but would tell you all that if you have not seen this before then stick around.
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 Or she was 60% attracted to you, then she found someone she's 80% attracted to. You'll probably never know. I'm not saying to give up yet.. but PROBABLY she isn't interested anymore. Is that flakiness or that's just how women are?
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 Really? Female cop comes to mind. I don't know you or your female friends but would tell you all that if you have not seen this before then stick around. What are you trying to tell me? I don't get it... this happens all the time?
doeblin Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Is that flakiness or that's just how women are? Men approach women, therefore women usually have multiple choices. It's quite likely she has found a guy she's more attracted to. She's elusive with you either because: - she wants you to be her B choice (not that likely) or - she doesn't like awkward conversations (who does?) Now, you can send another 10000 texts, and call her 20 times a day and then she WILL tell you to sod off, so you can have the closure you so crave. But don't worry, man! Plenty of fish! Date other women.
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 I don't go for just any woman... this makes it tough. When I like someone, I give it my all
doeblin Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 I don't go for just any woman... this makes it tough. WHAT? You think I'm a slag?! (I am though ) Listen, you don't know until you approach them. So approach & date a few woman at the same time, then you will have multiple choices.
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 That's not the same as using them?
Jules Dash Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 What are you trying to tell me? I don't get it... this happens all the time? Absolutely. It's a common feature of dating. Guy get a response on a dating site, great first date or kiss at the end of the night on the first date and start to fantasize about marrying the woman and getting her pregnant. The woman drives home at the end of the night wondering what Jimmy is up to. The problem is, the guy she just had a date with is not Jimmy.
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 So most women are like this you are saying?
OwMyEyeball Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 Alternate theories: - She performed poorly on an important exam and is struggling with the fallout - She began doing floor work and has been overwhelmed with the emotional drain that nursing can have when first (and later) dealing with the often grim demands of hospital work - She did not gain admission to her hospitals of choice and may now be scrambling to get work in a place that is at least close to home. Maybe she has to move? The frustration of uncertainty is compounded by the 6 figures in debt she has accumulated to get through nursing school in the first place - Her sleep schedule and diet have been turned on their head by the 26-hour shifts she's had to put in for her nursing residency Life can sometimes be effing tough out there. Sometimes a wonderful date can take the back seat to much more pressing immediate and personal issues. A lot on here are writing her off as a flake. Maybe she was, but I doubt a person who's chosen a career in compassion would be so callous. Christ, she's in an accelerated program. OP - You're better off not dating her if you can't relate to her job experience. It'll make things very frustrating for the both of you later on down the road.
Author Saijinkai Posted September 11, 2014 Author Posted September 11, 2014 ownmyeyeball, I have to admit, I do NOT understand how her life is and I desperately DO want to understand. I don't know how tough or busy an accelerated RN-BSN program is. I like her and I care for her. I'm not going to blow up her phone or push her away. I know better. It's the insecurity in me and the sudden changes I see from her that makes me worried. Her program is 11 weeks, then 2 weeks vacation. And her 11th week is next week. She was texting me for 1 month and we saw each other for 4 hours. Can things change that drastically at school?
Jules Dash Posted September 11, 2014 Posted September 11, 2014 So most women are like this you are saying? Sigh* What I am saying is most men are like this.
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