The "It's not you it's me"

[Kid_Charlemange]

"It's not you, it's me" is a cop out.

 

I agree. I just had a woman split with me after two months, and she was brutally honest about why were done. Sure, it hurt, but it also left no room for doubt and gave me that most elusive of breakup gifts: Closure.

[Gaeta]

You can turn it around any way you want. If you were REALLY into a woman nothing would keep you from being with her, not an extra 20-lbs, no financial problems, no career problems, no nothing, no heartbreaks. Those are excuses.

 

I met a man and 3 weeks later my daughter's dad died. I was an emotional wreck, it did not keep me from nourishing my relationship with him.

[Darren2013]

You can turn it around any way you want. If you were REALLY into a woman nothing would keep you from being with her, not an extra 20-lbs, no financial problems, no career problems, no nothing, no heartbreaks. Those are excuses.

 

I met a man and 3 weeks later my daughter's dad died. I was an emotional wreck, it did not keep me from nourishing my relationship with him.

 

 

But everyone has different priorities in life. You just consider a relationship the highest priority and that's why you entered into it despite being an emotional wreck.

 

Not everyone considers a relationship a high priority in their lives at all times. When I was diagnosed with cancer 2 years ago it wouldn't matter what kind of woman came into my life (I had options). A relationship wasn't a high priority while battling a disease that had and still has the potential to take my life early.

[Gaeta]

But everyone has different priorities in life. You just consider a relationship the highest priority and that's why you entered into it despite being an emotional wreck.

 

Not everyone considers a relationship a high priority in their lives at all times. When I was diagnosed with cancer 2 years ago it wouldn't matter what kind of woman came into my life (I had options). A relationship wasn't a high priority while battling a disease that had and still has the potential to take my life early.

 

 

It's not about relationships, it's about coming across an individual that captures your heart so much that everything else feels secondary, therefore you make being with that person a priority. Maybe it never happened to you that is why it's a concept hard to understand.

 

Of course you did not want to go look for a woman while going through cancer treatment BUT maybe, without even looking, an amazing woman would have come across your path, someone so unique that your heart would have overruled your head.

 

When you meet someone you're really into your heart will overrule your head.

 

Right now your head overrules your heart.

[Darren2013]

It's not about relationships, it's about coming across an individual that captures your heart so much that everything else feels secondary, therefore you make being with that person a priority. Maybe it never happened to you that is why it's a concept hard to understand.

 

Of course you did not want to go look for a woman while going through cancer treatment BUT maybe, without even looking, an amazing woman would have come across your path, someone so unique that your heart would have overruled your head.

 

When you meet someone you're really into your heart will overrule your head.

 

Right now your head overrules your heart.

 

 

 

Heart overruling the head can be very dangerous. If people think with their heads than their hearts more it would keep them out of alot of trouble.

[Darren2013]

I think the wisest thing is to think with my heart and think with my head. But if I had to make a choice then thinking with the head is more important than thinking with the heart. Thinking with the head involves practical thinking and rationality.