BITW Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 I'm 29. My wife's 18. We got married 3 months ago and three days later we were separated by 4,000 miles because we're in different countries. It'll be a year before I can even start the process of trying to bring her over here. In those 3 months, we've been on the phone every day and we've been missing each other but there's a constant feeling in my gut about whether it's going to work out or not; worried about when she'll be able to come over here and when we'll be able to actually start our life together. The feeling is all-consuming right now and I'm terrified it's going to ruin my relationship with her because all I can talk about is how she's not here with me and I wish she was. I'm asking myself, 'was she even ready to get married?'; 'she says she loves me and misses me' but whenever I don't get a message from her, I get worried about whether she's missing me or thinking of me because I know I am. I don't know what to do. I'm scared as hell my sadness is going to mess this up. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 You need to be talking to lawyers so you can over come the immigration issues. Then you can be together. Since you are already married, it's a bit late to worry if she is mature enough for this. You took vows. Focus on how to make it work. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author BITW Posted July 29, 2014 Author Share Posted July 29, 2014 True, we have taken those vows. It's dealing with the waiting game that's getting to me - in the meantime, all these thoughts are creeping into my head. How do you stop yourself from going nuts thinking about this stuff? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 Plan your next vacations when you can see each other. Link to post Share on other sites
Tbisb74 Posted July 29, 2014 Share Posted July 29, 2014 What culture/religion are we talking about here? And where are you both (Just countries, not post/zip codes....) Link to post Share on other sites
Author BITW Posted July 30, 2014 Author Share Posted July 30, 2014 I'm in England, she's in Pakistan. Both Pakistani. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 Find an immigration consultant or lawyer to advise you. There is not much we can offer in terms of the when/how she'll be able to migrate to England. As for being ready...18 is awfully young. Who she is as a person is bound to change over the coming years and she has plenty of growing and exploring to do. Why did you marry? I don't mean to be presumptuous, but was it an arranged union? Link to post Share on other sites
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